Between 2 loves
by pagetbabe
Summary: Derek loves Emily who loves Aaron. So: how this is going to be? Will Derek be able to change her feelings? Will Aaron even notice her feelings? A Morgan/Prentiss/Hotch triangle.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi people, well, I am trying to correct this story. I'm going to do it chapter by chapter, so I know that most of you already read it.**

**I feel sorry that I lost the comments here on the site, because I deleted the original story, so, even if you already read, please, comment again, even because I will change some things during the corrections.**

**Also, I changed the name, the original version was called: "Choices and Consequences", but I decided to change because then I can change the end if I want to.**

** I own nothing**

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><p>It was a Saturday night. Emily was at home, finally a weekend off, after working during months in row including weekends. She never complained for having to work on weekends because her life had been so empty lately of other things than work that that she was preferring to work than staying at home, because then she could see him and be with him, at least.<p>

She was very comfortable at home in her kitty pajamas, watching some old series on TV, drinking some wine, totally closed in her very secret and private world with her feelings under locked and key inside some very big box that she was trying to send to Neptune, the most distant planet from Earth, especially now that things with Beth were becoming serious.

She was brought back from reality by her cell phone that was ringing. She picked it up and saw Morgan's face on the screen.

"Hey, Morgan..."

"Hey, Princess… what's up?" He asked.

"Ahhh…What's up what?" She asked.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

"Ohh… I'm having fun with the Golden Girls, in my pajamas and drinking some wine…"

"Ahh… are they asking for me?"

"Who?"

"The Golden Girls…" He said, laughing.

"Oh, Morgan… stop… what's the joke… you calling me... on the Saturday night?" She said smiling.

"Well, actually, there is no joke…. I was driving and I ended up in your neighborhood…. and I was wondering if you are at home and that maybe we could talk or something…and..."

Actually he was already in front of her condo.

"Yeah… Morgan, it looks like today is your lucky day, I am at home…. You can come…"

Morgan was not sure what he would to say to her. He didn't have any specific plans. He had no idea what would happen. He just knew that he wanted to spend some time with her.

She quickly changed her clothes. She dressed in a comfortable gym pants and a comfortable t-shirt. She opened the door for him to enter, smiling at him. He smiled back, and while he was stepping inside he said:

"Ohh… you changed your clothes… I was so hoping for the day I would see Emily Prentiss in her pajamas…"

"Ahh… you want to see me in my pajamas… Mhm…"

"Well… what I really want is to see you without it… but…"

"Mhm… keep dreaming… ...will you keep me company... do you want some wine?"

"Sure…"

While Emily was serving some wine for him, he sat on the couch. She handed the wine for him and sat on the other sofa, turning off the TV. She said:

"So, what brings you here on a Saturday night? Where are your girls?" she asked in a tone of joking.

Morgan then looked at her and she could see in his eyes that he was not there to make jokes. That he really was in need to talk to someone. She then said:

"What's going on Morgan? You are acting strange…. where is the biggest smile in the world?"

He was determined to open his heart now. He was there with all his heart and he would not come back and give up at least let her know how he feels. He said:

"I have a problem ..." He said.

"Oh... Morgan...Everyone has problems..." She said, trying to comfort him.

"Emily….I'm in love with someone…" He said, looking at her.

Her first reaction was to laugh immediately but when she looked at him, she could see a little bit of pain in his eyes, she changed her behavior and she could really see that he was there trying to find some support and someone that he could talk to and he could count on. So, she would try to comfort him. She said:

"Oh, and that sounds like a territory totally new for you, uh?"

"Actually, the 'new territory' is to assume it for myself as I've been denying it for a long lime now…"

"Morgan… sometimes we are so comfortable in our safe place that we fear to take risk and everything… ...but the only way to gain is risking... maybe you should just give it a try… talk to her… open your heart… maybe it can work… and if don't… at least you tried and you will be able to move on and turn that page…"

"It's not that simple…"

"It's never easy to leave our safe place and come clean… especially when it comes to feelings…but, Morgan… it is the only way that you can know if she feels the same way about you or not..."

"I kind of already know it…" Morgan said, without looking at her.

"Who's the lucky girl?"

Still without looking at her, he smiled remembering the woman who he was in love with, and said:

"She is the most amazing woman in the world…. she is funny…. she is absolutely gorgeous, she is incredibly hot… she can smile with her eyes…. she is smart, sensible, her presence makes me happy... and I could stay here during all night talking about her and it would not be enough…"

"Wow…. Buddy….I'm sorry… but, man…you are really in love…"

Morgan said nothing. She said:

"Tell me about her… let's profile her and see if I can help you in this…. what does she do?"

Morgan looked at her now and said:

"…She works for the FBI…"

She was really surprised now. She said:

"Wow… FBI here… here in DC?"

"Yes…"

"Aw… Erm…"

The talk seemed to have a life of its own now. And all the cool and relaxed environment now was giving place to a dense and apprehensive place. Emily said:

"Do I know her?"

Morgan let out a smile and without looking at her, he answered:

"Yeah… You definitely know her…"

"Oh… So… if I know her… she works at the BAU…." It had a question implicit.

"Yeah… she works for the BAU…"

"Morgan… if it is who I'm thinking it is… I'm sure she loves you too… I mean… she has Kevin… but I'm pretty sure that she is totally in love with you…"

Morgan then let another super bitter smile out and said:

"Penelope is like a little sister for me, Emily…"

"Aw…Erm…"

The talk was really dense now. All the smiles that Emily was giving to him had given place to a worried and an apprehensive expression on her face. She was really confused now because then, it left her and JJ, and JJ was married! And that would be a problem for him. She needed to be sure, so she asked:

"Is she...married...?"

Emily's heart was almost coming out of her mouth just waiting for the answer. But she was trying to keep calm and control her emotions and her breathings, although she was really anxious for his answer.

He thought for a little while before answering, but he was there for that, he needed to tell her. He was a lot of things, but coward was a thing that he was not. He looked at her in the eyes and said:

"No, she is not married..."

They were looking at each other in the eyes now, and she could see, she could see all the love inside his eyes, it meant more than zillion words that he could say now. It was something totally new for her. In the middle of all jokes and flirtation that they shared for the last six years, she could never dream that it had become in something not even near of love. But she still needed to be sure. Maybe it could be the young intern, or the cleaning woman, or some busty secretary. She said, then:

"What is preventing you from telling her?"

Looking down, he took a deep breath and he said, looking at her again:

"…Only because she is in love with someone else…"

She immediately broke the eye contact. She didn't want to take that risk of Morgan seeing something in her eyes. She thought: does he know about my super, hyper, ultra, mega hidden feelings? How come?'. She needed to be sure about it as well, she asked:

"How can you be so sure?"

"Come on, we are profilers…we see things even when we don't want to…"

"…But you hide very well your feelings"... Emily said sarcastically.

"Yeah… it is a defense mechanism…But…you must know when we are in love with someone we only pay attention in that person….. I'm pretty sure that this person who I am in love with, knows everything about this man she is in love with...all the mannerisms, all the details, the tells, everything...just the way I have my eyes on her all the time and it is because of this that I know that she is in love with someone else..."

Emily broke the eyes contact again thinking to herself that there was no way that she could disagree with him about what he just said.

She was feeling extremely uncomfortable now and he Derek could feel it. He knew that he had invaded her secret and private world.

No words were necessary. Emily now knew that she was the person that he was in love with, and Derek knew that she knew, and also that she was in love with Hotch. But they didn't say anything because all that would become real. Realizing how dense the environment had became, he said:

"I think I should go..."

She could feel the sadness in his voice but she simply could not do anything. She could not put anything into words. It would be unbearable the situation then: her best friend in love with her, her best friend knowing that she was in love with their boss. She then said:

"Yeah... you should probably go…"

She also had some sadness in her voice. But she needed to think, she needed to be alone now.

As she said that, they got up from the couch and walked to the door. She opened the door for him and he stepped out of her apartment, giving her only a little smile. He pressed the button of the elevator and waited and she stayed there at the door. Before he could enter the elevator, she called him:

"Hey, Derek?"

He looked at her. She said:

"Maybe you have a chance with her..."

He smiled at her just a little, and it was a bitter smile, because deep down he knew that task was almost impossible to achieve.

As soon as she closed the door, she said out loud to herself: 'oh Emily, who are you trying to fool?'

Now she had a new mission: to buy hundreds of new imaginary boxes to put each piece of information that she had just received, lock them up and put them on the roof, on the highest floor of her mind and forget.

'Well at least I have the whole Sunday to do it'. She definitely did not want to deal with it now.

Morgan drove back to his place. He was feeling a little better, he could not stand it anymore, hold that feeling only for himself, he was about to explode, even if he had no idea what was going to happen from now on, he had absolutely no regrets about what he had just done.

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading...<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

**I own nothing**

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><p>On the next Monday, in the morning, Emily arrived at the BAU trying to keep in mind that she had to forget all the talk that she did have with Morgan on Saturday night. It should stay very well sealed in her mental boxes. It could not be brought in here, not at the BAU, and certainly Morgan would not want to bring it up as well.<p>

Compartmentalization was the word, like always.

She took a deep breath when the door of the elevator opened on BAU floor. First thing, she went to get some coffee for her. From the small kitchen in the BAU, she, furtively, looked at Hotch's office and show could see that he already was there. 'Of course…' She thought.

While looking at his office, she dropped the plastic cup that she was holding to get the coffee. She, immediately, thought to herself: 'Don't look at him, Emily… not here, not anymore, Emily… you have to stop it, stop doing it!'

Trying to kick Aaron Hotchner out of her mind, she turned to go back to her desk just to see Derek, leaning on his desk, staring at her. Obviously that he had seen that she was looking at Hotch's office and that she had dropped the coffee which made all that mess. She walked towards her desk, passing by Morgan, dropping a 'Morning', without even looking at him.

She was a little concerned about 'how things would be from now on: 'Will I be able to handle with it? Will I be able to pretend that nothing happened? She was only thinking.

"Morning…" Morgan said back.

He was strangely feeling relieved: at least now she knew about his real feelings now, and he would only wait. He knew that the journey would be long. So, for now, he only said:

"How was your Sunday?"

Without looking at him, and looking for some document on the drawer of her desk, she only said:

"Ah… it was pretty normal… Yours?"

"It was… cool..."

Meanwhile, Reid joined them saying a 'Good Morning' to them and he went straight to his desk.

After not more than three minutes, JJ appeared on the top of the stairs and said:

"We got a case… a bad one…"

Emily, Morgan and Reid looked at her while she was going to call Rossi in his office. Reid added, more to himself:

"As if the others weren't…"

Emily and Morgan remained in silence, while the three agents were climbing the stairs toward the meeting room.

At the same time, Hotch was leaving his office. He said his usual cold "Morning" to them, but Emily did not bother to answer, not today, not now. She was only thinking to herself: 'don't look at him, don't even look at him, don't look at him' ... when suddenly she heard:

"Prentiss?" Hotch called her.

Contrary her mind, she looked at him.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"Oh…Yes..."

She thought to herself: 'Calm down, Emily, things will settle down, calm down, you are going to do well, you will be able to cope with the fact that your best friend ever is in love with you, and watching your steps, looks, gestures ... everything Oh! Not now….. a headache… the last thing that I need…'

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><p>In the plane returning from a really difficult case that had forced the team to be away from home for five days in a row, they were all closed in their own world.<p>

Emily was looking at her friends, one by one. JJ was, peacefully, sleeping on the couch. She had whom to come back for: Henry and Will, her family. She had a family.

Reid was also sleeping. He was in an armchair in front of her, with some book on his chest. Reid had his own particular way of living. And he always looked like he was being light years ahead of the rest of the world.

Rossi was reading something. He always read something to be able to continue with his writings. He did not have anyone waiting for him at home, but in his case, it had been his choice, because during all his life, he always had someone to come back to.

Hotch was reviewing some files of the last case, or the next one, she was not sure, he seemed focused on that paper, he was kind of married with his duty. But he had someone waiting for him: Jack, his precious baby boy, and put him to sleep, and he had her: Beth. Someone to massage his backs, someone to keep him warmed at night on the cold nights, someone to give him sweet Good Morning kisses, well, she stopped thinking about him, because she could break in tears right there, and no, it was not an option.

When she looked at Morgan, he had his usual headphones on his ears and he was looking out of the window of the plane. She thought to herself: 'Dear God, why couldn't I fall in love with him... to make things easier for me, even though that we would have to break the BAU rules, and face the bosses, at least it would be easy to deal with it. At least, I would have a chance to be happy, to have someone in my life. Why do I have to, once again, deal with feelings? Why Morgan had to make me access this part of my life which I spent so much effort to send my heart and my feelings to Jupiter. Oh, God, what am I gonna do now?'

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><p><strong>Back to Quantico:<strong>

It was around 11 PM of a Friday. Everyone was tired, exhausted. Emily was saving some work papers in her drawer. Then she took her purse to go home when she heard:

"Hi, my hot chocolate" ... Garcia played with Morgan.

"Hi, baby girl, what's up?"

"I was wondering if you have plans for tomorrow night and if you were not maybe we could repeat that night, huh?" Garcia said.

"Oh, I don't have any plans, Garcia, but I'm pretty sure we can not repeat that night… I'm not in the mood lately, sorry…"

"Ok…something that I can help you with?"

"No, baby girl… it's something that only I can deal with… thanks anyways…"

Morgan said that while he entered the elevator with his go-bag on his back to go home.

Garcia only watched him going then she said to herself:

"This definitely is not the Derek Morgan that I know…."

Then, she looked at Emily and asked:

"Do you know what is happening to him?"

"Me? Why would I know something?" Emily asked, frowning.

"Hmm…. Answering a question with another question…" Garcia teased Emily.

"….I don't think that there is something wrong with him...…. we all are just too tired…" Emily said.

"Okay…" Garcia said, and she was going to her office to pick up her things.

Before she could leave, Emily asked:

"Hey Pen, what did you two do in the other night?"

"I'm sure you do not want to know…" Garcia said.

Emily did a stray dog face, but she was not going to hand it. She asked nothing more. But, Garcia, seeing her face, she said:

"Okay… okay… for you I can tell… But it is nothing special….it is that about two weeks ago…. I was at my place… he arrived with a bottle of wine, it was a Saturday night, we talked a lot and we watched some movie and ... when I awoke in the morning he was gone…" Garcia said with a sad face.

"Oh, Pen… you and Morgan are always playing with each other and saying hot things all the time, but really, do you feel something real for him, I mean romantically?"

Garcia was startled by the question that was too directly for her. She took a deep breath and said:

"Well, I'm trying to delay of having to deal with this issue…. I prefer to continue like this… like friends that love each other instead of trying to move on and risk losing what I already have that is his friendship…. I was not supposed to be here until this time today…but I wanted to wait for him to arrive just to invite him… and you saw how he reacted…"

Emily felt a knot forming in her stomach, she thought: 'My God, she's in love with him!'

"Besides, I think he's in love with someone else ..." Garcia dropped.

Emily swallowed, thinking: 'Wow…Garcia is not even a profiler? Did he tell her? '

She said:

"What makes you think that?"

"On the same day that he went to my place… I'm pretty sure that he actually wanted to go to see someone else, but he did not have the courage and came to spend time with me… he dropped a few things… that made me realize that…. but when we were talking about the romantic comedy movie that we had just watched, he blurted out that living a "all the girls possible style boy" wasn't no longer a choice for him, because there was only one girl that he wanted… I was right there in front of him… So: this lucky one is obviously not me…"

"Pen, do you think it is….what you feel…you know...what you feel for him ….do you think…it is really love?"

Garcia stopped to think, and Emily added:

"It's ok if you do not want to say..."

"Actually, I do not know… I know that I love him in some way, not sure what way, and that's exactly what I don't want to find out..."

Emily smiled at her and then they went out.

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><p>That same night, while Emily was driving home, she started to think. She was feeling so sad. She really did not want to have to access the department of "feelings" inside her, but since Morgan started with that, she could no longer shut it down.<p>

And now, even if, by the divine work of the Holy Spirit, one day, in her life, she would be interested in Derek Morgan, then this would hurt Garcia so bad, that was one of the most precious person in the world.

'How could things become worse? Could I just continue with my unrequited love under lock and key? I was trained for this, to not show my feelings, to hide, to live alone, but dealing with the feelings of hurt with someone who you love is totally new to her. What am I going to do?' She thought, dropping a few tears.

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading...<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**I own nothing**

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><p>It had been almost one month since that Saturday night that Morgan had implicitly declared his love for Emily. Since then, both of them were acting as if nothing had happened. Emily had managed to avoid looking at Hotch and Morgan also had been avoiding looking at her all the time, to not embarrass her.<p>

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><p>It was a beautiful Saturday night and the whole team had been invited to a dinner at Rossi's mansion to celebrate his birthday. Morgan offered to give Emily a ride and for his surprise she had accepted it.<p>

Parked in front of her condo, he called her by cell:

"Hey, Emily, are you ready? Do you want me to go up?

"… It is not necessary…. I'll just pick up my purse…"

Emily was wearing a strapless black dress at the knee, black sandals, high heels, some jewelry, and a small black bag. Her beautiful face had only a light makeup, and her hair was pulled back. She looked beautiful.

From inside the car, he could see her making her path to his car. He was paralyzed by her beauty, he thought to himself: 'Dear God, help me… help me…'

His heart was pounding fast. He took a deep breath before she could get into the car.

"Hi..." She said, smiling, while she was getting into the car.

"Hi..." He said looking at her while she was putting the seatbelt on.

"…You look stunning…." He added.

She smiled a little, without looking at him. Then she looked at him to say:

"…You look pretty yourself, as well..."

Morgan was wearing a nice gray suit and a nice perfume that Emily could smell as soon as she had got into the car.

And then, Morgan drove towards Rossi's house. They were talking about everything minus what they really should have been talking about.

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><p>Rossi's garden was decorated with flowers and suspended lanterns. It had a romantic and familiar air to it. He also had hired some musicians to play violin, and the buffet was all ready as well, everything was ready.<p>

Hotch, Beth and Jack were sitting at a table and Rossi was also sitting with them. At another table, they were Garcia, JJ, Will and Henry. It had other tables with other guests, but not too many people since it was a very intimate celebration.

Emily was holding her purse in one hand and in the other hand she had a gift for Rossi. She had seen that Rossi was sitting at the same table as Hotch and Beth, so, she immediately thought to herself: 'Jesus, could he not be sitting at another table with other people?'

Then both Morgan and Emily approached the table to greet Rossi for his birthday and also the other people.

"Congratulations, Dave… I hope that you like this…it took me a while to find something that I think you would like…" Emily said and handed the gift for him.

Rossi took her hands on his and said:

"Oh, Emily, your presence is embellishing my party which is the main gift for me already..."

"Aw stop… you embarrass me…" She said, smiling.

Emily and Morgan then reached to greet the other people that were at the table. Emily was using her better 'poker face'. She had been avoiding looking at Hotch, especially now that Morgan knew her very well kept secret. But when she reached to greet Hotch, there was no way that she could not look at him. And of course that Hotch was staring at her with that intense look that could kill her and make her melt entirely right there in front of everyone. She felt a heat through all her body when she touched his hands. Especially because she had an impression that while he was staring at her, he was also holding her hand during a little more time that people use to hold a hand to greet someone: 'is there a statistic for how much time people usually hold each other hands for a normal greet? I wish Reid was here now for me to ask him… or… hmm… better not…', she thought.

Then, Morgan and Emily went to sit at another table, only the two of them. Realizing that she was a little quiet, more than normal, Morgan asked:

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good…"

He knew that she wasn't and she knew that he knew.

During the most part of the party, they stayed there sitting without speaking for a while just watching other people having fun, dancing, chatting, kids that were running around the beautiful garden.

Emily was thinking to herself, 'why do I feel so alone, why I can not just live my feelings, where in this world is written that I was born to be alone and unhappy... okay, Morgan is right here beside me, I can not complain, he is a perfect man that every woman in this planet could be with, but why I can not just fall in love with him, then? Why things have to be like this...'

At this point, she could feel a big lump forming in her throat, she was fighting back tears already seeing Hotch with Beth, sometimes they were talking, sometimes dancing, sometimes kissing, as they seemed so happy together, along with Jack, she concluded her thoughts with: 'Yeah, definitely there is no chance for me in love…'

She then looked at Morgan and thought: 'Wow, Morgan used to be so happy and now, look at him, he look so sad…. Did I cause this?' She was just wondering. She said to him:

"Morgan, you gave me a ride….it does not mean that you have to stay with me all the time…"

"…Am I bothering you? He asked her.

Wow, it was kind of rude. She opened her mouth a little in her typical "O". She said:

"Oh… no…Of course not..."

"Okay…. I'd rather stay here with you…" He said looking at her now.

"Thank you…"

"…You don't need to thank me, Emily…"

After another moment of silence, Morgan dropped:

"…You know, you should tell him…"

Emily froze. After a little while, she said:

"What?" She pretended that she didn't know what he was talking about.

"Hotch…" Morgan added and he didn't need to say anything else. She said:

"…No, Derek…please, just don't…"

"Emily, you have to tell him how you feel… after I told to you about my feelings... I felt better…. I felt stronger… because when we hide ourselves behind our feelings…. it is like if we are not living and only existing…we all have our sealed boxes full of issues that we just wished that we do not have to deal with... but in the end of the day….. they are still there…. and they will stay until the day we decide to deal with them…"

Emily was listening to him and staring at a fixed point in the table. He then put his hand over hers, making her looking at him now, and continued speaking:

"…The love that I feel for you is so big… it's so pure and sublime… that I rather bear the pain of seeing you with him just to see you happy ... ...than see you this way that I am seeing now...… but you have to try…. and I'm here for you, and I'll always be…. just in case you need…."

Feeling comforted by his words, she opened up herself a little to him:

"I can't, Derek, look at them….he is with her…. Look how he looks happy with her… besides, he's my boss…it could completely compromise my job and our friendship… There are a lot of obstacles…"

"…Our friendship has not changed after I told you… although you've been trying to get away a little, but from my part, it's still the same thing… I'll always respect you…"

She smiled at him. He said:

"It's better you tell him… and even if he does not feel the same about you… at least you tried… it's better than you never try…"

She smiled at him and said:

"Thank you…Derek…. you know…. in a certain way, I love you…"

Morgan was looking at her and immediately thought: 'For God's sake, Emily, do not give me this thing that 'you love me as a brother', for God's sake, don't ...'

It was exactly what she meant to say, but she remained quiet.

Except for the broken hearts, the party was very good, nice talks and everything.

At the end of the party, Emily entered the mansion to go to the bathroom, to check her make-up, etc.

When she tried to open the door of the toilet, she realized that it was locked, which made her wait outside. While she was waiting, she was observing the beautiful paintings on the hall wall, Rossi really had a refined taste for renowned paintings and millions of dollars to buy them, she thought.

Seeing the paintings, she did not notice when the bathroom door opened. Hotch was the one who was in the bathroom. He opened the door and he saw Emily from afar just looking at the pictures on the wall. He stood there for a few seconds staring at her in her little black dress, marking the curves of her perfect body.

Realizing that she had not noticed that the bathroom was now free, he walked up to her, saying while he was passing behind her backs.

"You look gorgeous". He said it and left without looking back.

Emily's mouth opened a little at the same time that it seemed that all the air in world had been stolen. She blushed as she felt her face getting warm, burning in desire. She mentally thanked God that she still had her backs to him while he said that. She quickly entered the bathroom and locked herself in there, leaning her body against the back of the door. 'Emily… since a long time ago you are not a teen anymore…...don't behave yourself like a teenager with her first love… …' She thought to herself. 'There were only three little words, three words from HIM, Aaron Hotchner, cold, controlled, committed with another person, my boss, he noticed me, he noticed me as a woman, God, I do not know what to think…'

And with a thousand thoughts in her mind, she tried to calm down. She tried to control her breath. She then looked at her in the mirror and started to redo her make-up. After this, she gave a last look in the mirror and said to herself:

"You really look gorgeous, Emily Prentiss! The most gorgeous woman in the world… So go outside and show that man how to lose his mind…. In the most spicy way…"

Leaving the bathroom, she thought: 'I wished myself could believe in this'.

Returning to the party, the most of the people had left already. From afar, she saw Hotch talking to Rossi, they were standing a little away from the dance floor. She walked by them, and passing behind Hotch's backs, she said:

"Thanks..."

And she made her path back to the empty table because Morgan was dancing cheek to cheek with Garcia and Reid had already left.

Rossi was 'the man', absolutely nothing go unnoticed by him. He could not miss the opportunity now, and said:

"…She looks really beautiful today…"

Both men were still looking at Emily and her perfect silhouette swaying her hips while she was walking to the table. Hotch answered only:

"Yes…"

Realizing that Hotch was looking down now, Rossi said:

"C'mon, Aaron, allow yourself to enjoy life a little bit…. looking at her will not take a chunk from you or her…. The beautiful things in life are there to be enjoyed…"

"…She is not a 'thing', Dave ...''

"Well… that I agree… I know she is not a 'thing'…. but a really beautiful woman…. You know… we are all lucky for working with such beautiful women…and I will still say… I'd like to be on the shoes of the man that she is so in love with ... lucky man…"

Of course that Rossi knew about Emily's secret passion for Hotch. Not that Rossi had some kind of romantic interest in her, but was the teacher of all the profilers. He noticed things even when he did not want to.

"…I just hope that this man is not from the team…" Hotch said, staring at nothing.

"Aaron, it does not matter… there is a woman in love… and life is too short and we should allow ourselves to be happy when we get the chances as they become very few the older we get..."

"I'm very happy with Beth…." Hotch said, looking at his drink.

Rossi thought for a while and said:

"…Sometimes we choose to love a person that we think that best suits us and we just fool ourselves for a long time... sometimes for the whole life… trying to escape and deny the love that really will make us happy for the rest of our lives… only because we are afraid to risk… Think about it…"

Morgan and Emily were on the dance floor. It was playing a very romantic song. Emily closed her eyes and thought: 'I feel so safe with him, dear God, if I just could choose, I'd fall for him in a second, I do not know how long I'll bear to be so lonely, look what he did for me, he went after Ian Doyle, a dangerous criminal, for seven months and he succeeded, he found him and he did it for me, and yet he was able to forgive me…'

And Morgan, well, the world could end now and he would be happy for having her in his arms, feeling her body, her perfume, and he almost could feel her heart beating inside her chest so close they were.

* * *

><p>After the party, Morgan was driving her home. They were almost at Emily's place. Emily was thinking about Morgan's words, she was really flattered. She had never thought that someone could fall in love with her for real, especially Derek Morgan that was such a special person. Especially considering that her last serious relationship had been with nobody less than Ian Doyle.<p>

On the other hand, Hotch's three words were hammering into her mind.

Parking in front of her condo, he just looked at her for a while and said:

"Okay… the princess is back to her castle…"

Emily looked at him, smiled at him. Then she reached the handle of the car, but before she could open it, she looked at him again and said:

"Do you want to come up for a coffee?"

Morgan was not expecting this at all. He was pleasantly surprised. He said:

"…Are you sure?"

Loneliness, doubts, sadness, hormones were all screaming inside that woman. She said:

"…Pretty sure, Derek…"

* * *

><p><strong>So, what will happen inside that apartment? Haha… Stay tuned to find out!<strong>

**Thanks for reading…**


	4. Chapter 4

**I own nothing**

* * *

><p>They entered Emily's place talking about how good the party had been and how Rossi knew how to please people,etc. When Emily was making her path to the kitchen to prepare the coffee, Morgan said:<p>

"Emily, I think I prefer a drink…"

"Oh, okay, I have some good wines, whiskey, beer, what do you prefer?"

"We could drink a wine…"

"Okay... As long as you open it…"

'Dear God, this woman bringing this man all the time to home now and I cannot take my nap on the couch. Didn't she know that the couch is my favorite place?' Sergio thought while he quickly went to his second favorite place in the house: her bed.

While she handed the bottle for him to open it, she said:

"Derek, do you mind if I go upstairs to change my clothes and remove my makeup?"

"Oh…Of course not, Emily…"

While she was climbing the stairs, he said, smiling at her:

"If you need some help…"

Emily smiled back and went upstairs.

Once in her bedroom, in her world, in her safe place, for a moment, she gave herself the luxury of imagining Derek Morgan removing her dress, helping her undo the zipper of her dress. She closed her eyes, and imagined his body, wow, his delicious body, his muscles, oh my God, help me to control my emotions.

Getting dressed in her comfortable clothes, she said:

"Hey, buddy, you know that you have to be polite with the visits, huh, Serg? You just vanished from the place… it is not that way that Mom taught you…"

'Oh, no… I'll have to find a third favorite place in this house…' The cat thought, but before he could vanished from Emily's room too, she got out from there first.

Morgan was already sitting on the sofa waiting for her, savoring every drop of his wine. He was totally controlling his mind to not think about what might be going on upstairs, a Saturday night, alcohol, and Emily Prentiss changing clothes in the same few squares meters away from him and he almost could not control his instincts with these stuff all together, so he decided to think only about the worst UNSUBS that he had hunted.

Dressed in a comfortable sweatpants and a red top, and without any make-up, she went downstairs. As soon as Morgan saw her, he said:

"…You look even more beautiful than before…"

"…Stop it Derek…" She said, while she picked up the glass of wine that he had prepared for her.

For his surprise, she sat on the same sofa as him.

"…No, Emily, you're absolutely beautiful the way you are…. your skin, your eyes, your sweet way, you know, I just love everything about you…"

"Derek, you keep spoiling me….. it can cost you…."

"I paid…. I pay everything…"

Emily just smiled. She was very comfortable on the couch with her legs on it.

Derek then put his drink on the coffee table, and looked at Emily. After a while without saying anything, he started to stroke her hair. She knew that it was not right, not in those circumstances. She wanted to ask him to stop it, but, damn, it felt so good.

So she let herself to be caressed by his strong hands for a little time. She closed her eyes and simply surrendered to the sensations that he was providing for her.

Suddenly, he started to massage her shoulders around her neck with his strong hands. Emily, of course, that she was enjoying it, much, much, more than she wanted to.

Her heart was starting to pound fast, her breathing was getting difficult. 'God, Emily, make him stop it…', she thought but she just could not help herself. He was very good at it.

While she still had her eyes closed, he took the glass of wine from her hand and put id on the coffee table. By this act of him, she opened her eyes and looked at him. He was just a few inches away from her. She was only studying his expressions, and she could not control her mouth with a little "o". Morgan looked straight at her slightly opened mouth, like a magnet.

Her breathing was heavy, her mouth was very dry. He could not help himself, he could see that her mouth was dry, then, he gently held her face with both hands, and he slowly passed his tongue on her lips, as if to wet them. She felt an warmth and a shiver of desire throughout all her body. As she could not even think anymore, she, instinctively, opened her mouth a little more as an invitation for him to deepen the kiss.

And he kissed her. He kissed her passionately and deeply. And she kissed him back. She kissed him as if the world would end. As they were kissing, they let their bodies being guide by the sensations and started to move almost automatically on the sofa, never breaking the kiss, only guided by the emotions and desires of their bodies.

Emily was now totally lying on the couch and Morgan was over her, lightly resting his body on the couch to not choke her with his weight over her thin body.

After about twenty minutes only kissing each other on the mouth, Morgan started to kiss the curve of her neck, she gently held his head as if to guide him, and eyes were closed all the time.

While kissing her on the neck, he started to caress her waist under the blouse that she was wearing. That was too damn good. His strong and muscled and warm body, and his hands were all over the place on her body.

But, as our mind sometimes, most of times, trick us, three little words started to pop up in her mind. They were "… you look gorgeous…", "… you look gorgeous…","… you look gorgeous…","… you look gorgeous…","… you look gorgeous…","… you look gorgeous…", and with this hammering into her brain, she was totally brought to her unfair fate: being in love with someone that was not that person who was there, even though, the sensations that she was feeling now were too damn good and wonderful, she could not avoid but remember of that look, that look that he always gave to her, and that she knew that there were a lot behind that intense look, and she would find this out.

Remembering this other man, she was brought from this wonderful dream to a real world. She opened her eyes and started to move as if for Derek to get up. She said:

"No, no, no, no, stop it, stop it... Derek..."

Very, very quickly, she was standing and walking around the living room, her right hand was rubbing her forehead as if she wanted to erase something.

Morgan just took a deep breath still sitting on the couch, looking down. He was totally disappointed. Then he finally looked at her and said:

"I'm sorry… I shouldn't have…"

Still standing, she cut him off:

"No, that's okay, it just ... It's me… I just can't ... Derek... I mean…We can not do this ... not when just one part is in love..."

"…You do not need to remind me that my love for you is a one-way thing…"

Then he got up from the couch and picked up his coat, and walking towards the door, he said:

"…Thanks for the drink..."

"Derek, please, you can not just leave, we need to talk…"

Her voice was trembling as she really cared about him.

"…I'm done with talking, Emily…. I could feel right now how much you wanted me….how much you desire me… I could feel that every inch of your body was enjoying, why deny it to us? We are adults here! Why do not try? Why do not just enjoy? Just let it happen and see how it goes…. why do not just give us a chance? I would not be asking if I had not felt it in your kiss... in your body… these kinds of things just cannot be faked…. or was it?"

She thought for a while and said:

"Derek… you are my best friend… I love you so much… I love being with you… but hurting you is the last thing that I want to … you have to understand… we can not risk going to a place to which we both know there is no point of return…"

"Were you not enjoying?" Morgan asked, nonconformistly.

"Of course I was….. Derek… you're beautiful…. you have an incredible delicious body, you are perfect… any woman in the universe would like to be in my shoes right now….. I bet it, and of course that I would like to be with you right now in my bed, feeling each part your body, fucking my brains out….. but then… and tomorrow? …And after tomorrow? I can not just use you…I cannot do this to you… not when you are in love with me ... try to understand..."

"So you're telling me that if I was not in love with you, we would be probably fucking right now?"

She thought for a while and as if trying to break the talk, she said:

"…I don't know, Derek, I don't know…."

"Emily, I am an adult… I know how to take care of myself… you don't have to worry about my feelings… I can make my own choices…"

"I'm sorry, Derek…"

He replied with a hug and a kiss on the top of her head. And he left. She was there in her bed reliving all the facts of that night, needless to say how much she cried, and how much she cursed herself for not having any space in her imaginary boxes to store all these new happenings, 'those damn boxes were overflowing'.

* * *

><p>At that same night, at that same moment, Hotch was driving Beth to her place. Along the way, they talked about the party. Once they arrived at her house, she said to him:<p>

"Do you wanna come inside?

"Oh, no, thank you Beth, but it's too late now…."

"C'mon... tomorrow is Sunday, we could stay in bed till late… then I make your breakfast and we could just stay in bed for the rest of the night…."

"…tonight, I'm just not in the mood…"

Hotch was kind of lost in his own words so he stopped talking. He did not want to give all of his secrets to her.

"Aaron, it has been a long time since the last time…what is going on?"

"Beth, look, I really do not want to have this conversation with my son sleeping in the back seat" ... He looked at her.

"Okay…We'll talk at another time then…. Good night..."

"Good night, Beth…"

* * *

><p>At his home, Hotch put Jack to sleep, and even though it was almost two in the morning, he could not sleep. He put a whiskey for himself, and he sat on a small sofa on the balcony to appreciate the full moon and the stars that were lighting up the beautiful night.<p>

After a little while, when he was staring at the most beautiful and bright star, someone popped up in his mind: she was beautiful, dressed in a black dress, graceful, smiling at him ... Emily... he closed his eyes and he stayed for a few minutes more to remember all the smiles that she gave to him, there were just a few, but there was just something about that smile that he could not stop thinking about it.

Once Hotch realized that Emily had totally invaded his thoughts, he opened his eyes, and freaked out.

He had no idea from where did she appear in his mind. Deep, deep down, he knew very well, but he had never fed these kinds of thoughts, especially towards Emily Prentiss.

He immediately turned his thoughts to think about Beth, leaving Emily there, somewhere very hidden in his brain, that to not mention the word "heart" or "feelings". He also spent sometime fighting to himself to not to think about Rossi's wise words to him.

* * *

><p>Morgan went back to his place with a bitter taste in his mouth, happy that he had kissed her and sad by the way the night had ended, and repeating to himself: 'I can not blame her for not loving me back…'<p>

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks for reading…<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**I own nothing**

* * *

><p>After that kiss, Emily and Derek managed to disguise the small change that their relationship had suffered to the rest of the team. They were able to deal with what had happened, but their friendship certainly was not the same. Emily closed herself in her own little world even more.<p>

* * *

><p>The team was now in Florida working on another case of a serial killer that was attacking in nightclubs. They were now in front of the nightclub when Hotch ordered Emily to go in the club to see if she saw someone that looked like the UNSUB, more like a bait.<p>

"Sure..." She said with no hesitation.

And she started to take off the vest.

"Hotch, it is too dangerous for her… we know that he does not hesitate to kill… the last time he killed right there in the middle of the club and managed to escape…." Morgan said to his boss.

Emily waited for Hotch's answer. He said to her, placing his hand on her shoulder:

"Are you okay with that?"

"I'll do whatever you think is necessary…." She replied.

"Okay, you go in there… and we'll be watching you all the time… Just give us a sign when you realize that you found the right guy…"

"Okay…"

They entered the club. The place was dark and the flashing lights were not helping. Emily walked around the club, she covertly watched the guys hoping to recognize the UNSUB. Morgan was in a strategic point, well hidden and so was Hotch, both keeping their eyes on her all the time.

Emily was now leaning on the counter facing the front of the dance floor, watching the guys who were dancing. After about twenty minutes, Emily felt something on her backs. She immediately realized that it was a weapon. She made the typical "O", and the guy said in her ear:

"You bitch, I know who you are and we'll go out for a ride and you'll be nice and quiet or I'll shoot you r.i.g.h.t n.o.w…"

Emily was leaving the club with him while he was saying in her ear:

"I knew your team was looking for me… I can go to jail but I'm gonna kill one of your team and you got the lucky, you bitch…does your team always use you as a bait?... huh…. Like a little whore?"

Tears were forming in her eyes, but she managed to hold them. She was breathing heavily and swallowing hard. Morgan and Hotch realized immediately what was going on. They went out of the club without being noticed by the UNSUB.

Arriving into the parking lot, the UNSUB was putting Emily in the trunk of the car, both Hotch and Morgan stopped him:

"FBI. Don't move!" Hotch said, pointing a gun to him.

The UNSUB moved to point the gun at Emily's head, but he had no time: Hotch gave him the fatal shot. Morgan went to her:

"Did he hurt you?"

"No, I'm ok…"

She lied. In fact, she was not ok. Emily always felt good to be able to help in cases and she felt a personal satisfaction when the case ended with the UNSUB behind bars, but lately she was feeling that it was always her to be on the front line, it made her questioned herself about how her colleagues saw her: 'Did they think that I was the one that had less to lose? …Only because she did not have any family or boyfriend, or kids, or husband, just a cat'.

* * *

><p>After that case, in the flight back to Quantico, they were all very tired, exhausted even, nobody wanted to talk.<p>

Hotch could see that Emily was sitting alone in a chair in the back part of the plane. He went there and he sat on in front of her. He asked:

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good." She lied.

"I'm sorry for what happened..." Hotch said almost whispering.

"It's okay, Hotch… I'm more than used to it…." She said, looking out the window.

In some way, it made him think that she did not have anyone waiting for her at home, okay, it could be her choice, and she was a strong woman, but seeing her there, hugging herself under the blanket, curled on herself, on that airplane chair, made him wonder with whom she would be able to recover from these terrible things that she used to face in the field?' And with these thoughts, he said to her:

"Prentiss…."

She looked at him. He said:

"…I need you to know that I'm here whenever you need to talk..."

She looked at him for a while, but: 'damn it!' nobody could read that man properly. She thought: 'Me? Open up myself to you? Just for you to send me to the BAU's psychologist? No thanks!' but obviously she did not say any of this, instead, she said:

"Thank you…"

He noticed a cold and distant tone in her voice, so he said:

"…I'm not talking only as your boss but….. (…he stopped for two seconds) as your friend...as someone that…. That you can count on…"

He said these words looking straight into those dark eyes of hers. She just smiled in response, trying to mask the sweet surprise.

Since the others were all asleep and the flight was far from over, Emily could not waste the opportunity. She was at a point where she felt that she had nothing to lose, so she took a risk:

"So, how are the things with Beth?"

Hotch was not expecting that question at all, he was completely surprised. He froze for a minute to process the question and formulate the answer. Typical Aaron Hotcher! Of course that he showed nothing, no emotion, unintelligible expression, as much as Emily was an excellent profiler, she could not read anything in him at that moment.

"She is nice…." He said.

Emily thought: 'Well, that does not answer my question. I asked how things were going and not whether she was a good person. It is clear that she was a good person, but it is also clear that he does not want to talk about it'.

She gently turned her face to look out the window as if she had realized that he did not want to talk about it.

Hotch really did not want to talk about it at first. He did not want to open himself to anyone, especially to a subordinate, even more especially because this subordinate was a beautiful woman with whom he could not give him the luxury of even looking at. But, after about a minute, he said:

"…It was a good experience..."

Emily's thought flew, while her face turned to look at him. She was not expecting this confession. She thought: 'Was? How come? Did they break up? They are no longer together? And he is here, right in front of me, confiding this to me? Dear God, pinch me, Emily, organize your thoughts so you can make things clear, and fast…'

So, she only pretended that she had not understood what he had just said and she said:

"I'm sorry?"

He gave her that intense look that could kill someone by melting in love, and he added:

"Beth is an excellent person… Jack likes her… she was very important to me in this process of proving to my myself that… I'm not dead for relationships…now I know that somewhere in the future… I can live a real love again...I could realize by this relationship with her that… in the past… I really loved Haley, but things stayed in the past… In this relationship with Beth… I could see that I'm ready to love again… but somehow I know that she is not the one… I know that somewhere there is a new love waiting for me…"

Emily could not help herself: it was just unbelievable. She was struggling with herself to not to show the storm of emotions that she felt growing inside her now. She thought: 'Somewhere? No! Here, right here, I'm right here!' But she only said:

"So, did you break up?"

Looking at the files on his lap, he said:

"No…"

Looking at her now, he added:

"Not yet…"

'Poker face, Poker face, Poker face, Poker face', Emily was mentally reminding herself.

He continued, still looking at her:

"…But I would say that our relationship has not passed the stage of "…we are just knowing each other better…", but I still need to talk to her… We are no longer playing the same tune... And I have to be honest with her… she might be expecting something I cannot give to her…"

Emily thought: 'Dear God hold me back because I am capable of throwing myself into his arms right now... if I understood well they are not serious, and he told this to me. He opened himself to me before telling her... …Emily calm down, breathe, that's just a conversation, you're a grown woman, completely able to handle with guns, with the most dangerous kinds of criminal, you have a great high esteem, so calm down, breathe and you will do this very well'.

She was trying to control her emotions and thoughts when she heard:

"What about you? …Still dating Sergio"? He asked her with a very charming smile on his face, almost making her blush as he knew that Sergio was just a cat.

Emily smiled a little embarrassed while she was thinking: 'does he know how miserable my love life is, oh no…!? Come on, Emily, get out of this now …'

She looked at him, and he seemed to have a big interrogation point on his face, showing that he was really waiting for her answer, staring at her all the time.

She opened her mouth in the typical "o" a little bit, and she mentally repeated to herself: 'don't blush, don't blush, don't blush', then, she blushed, just a little. She said:

"I'm in the same place as you… hoping that… somewhere… there is some special person for me… but I think I'm not too sure about it as you are… so I try not to think about it..."

* * *

><p>A few days later, the whole team was working on a case in New York. The UNSUB was abducting teenagers, raping, torturing and killing them. The team had been there for three days already and the investigation was progressing well. So, in a few hours more, they were able to solve the case.<p>

* * *

><p>The team could not fly back home that night, because of some storms, so they returned to the hotel to rest.<p>

At night, the whole team was gathered in the restaurant of the Hotel to have dinner together, except Morgan. He was sitting at the counter of the restaurant talking to a blonde woman.

The woman was wearing a very short dress, and her huge boobs were almost jumping out of the dress.

They were talking very animatedly. Rossi said:

"Oh… seeing Morgan… I miss my old times of a player…"

"Yeah… and apparently she does not need even airbags in the car…" Reid said.

"I bet that he is not listening to one single word that she is saying…" JJ said.

Emily was just listening to the comments and she could not help herself: she was jealous to death. Even she did not know why she was feeling like that.

Without even finishing her dinner, she said to the team:

"Guys… I have a terrible headache… so I'm going to the room…"

"Oh, do you need something?" JJ asked.

"No, thanks, JJ… I think I have some aspirin in my go-bag…"

Emily then walked fast by Morgan without looking at him, and went towards to the elevator on the hall of the Hotel.

But, of course, that he noticed her. Then, immediately, he dropped the blonde woman and went after Emily. He managed to reach her before the elevator doors close, so he entered the elevator. She looked very pissed off.

"Hey… Prentiss… what happened?" He asked.

She looked at him as if shooting arrows from her eyes, opening her mouth in a big "O". She said:

"…Prentiss?" She asked, frowning. She could not believe it. They almost had sex, 'he almost swallowed me with that kiss on the mouth, and now calls me by last name?"

Morgan was a little confused. He really did not know why she was behaving like that. He asked:

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing..." She answered without looking at him, of course that she would not tell.

The elevator door opened and they came out, she walked fast to her room. He went behind her.

She took her card and opened the room, but when she was trying to close the door on his face, he placed his foot in the doorway so she could not close the door.

"Excuse me?" She asked, politely but pissed still.

"No…" He said.

"Morgan…" She insisted.

"Emily, no, until you tell me what is going on…"

"Whatever... I'll leave the door opened…"

She entered the room leaving the door opened. Of course that he entered after her and locked the door. She went straight to the bathroom, to brush her teeth, and change her clothes, etc.

When she returned to the bedroom in her beige satin pajamas, she said to him:

"…You still here?

Of course that she knew that he was there.

"I am and I'll stay until you tell me what is going on." He said.

"…Morgan…I'm tired…."

"Emily, look, I do not deserve this… As far I remember I did not do anything wrong… did I do or say something that hurt you?"

Realizing that he was right, she only said:

"Look… I'm tired… that's it… I'm sorry…."

He could realize by her voice that the anger had given place to sadness, and he wanted to fix this now.

"Emily… just tell me … did I do something wrong?"

"No…. I have a headache … I just want to be alone…"

Of course that Morgan was talking to the blonde woman only to make Emily jealous, but needed to know if it had worked, that's why he was insisting so much. He knew that if he irritated her, she would drop everything. He said:

"I will not leave here if you don't tell me why you left the dinner so fast and pissed…"

"I already said… I'm not pissed … I have a headache…"

"You know Emily… when we have a headache we just take some pills and that's it…"

"Derek… do me a favor…Why don't you go fuck that busty blonde and leave me alone…"

Morgan was celebrating inside his mind right now. He said:

"Oh….Are you jealous?"

She opened her mouth wide now, and said:

"…Of course not!"

At this point, Morgan approached her and grabbed her by the waist, strongly because he knew she would try to escape, to literally show her that she had no reason to be jealous. They were face to face now, but she was avoiding looking at him. She held both his arms with her hands as if she was really trying to escape from the hug. Of course that deep down she did not want this, she wanted to stay right there, in his hug, so she did not make much effort.

He then said:

"I don't (he kissed her on the forehead) ... go ... (he kissed her on the tip of her nose) ... back ... (he kissed her on the right cheek) ... to that ... (he kissed her on the left cheek) ... blonde ... (he kissed her on the forehead) ... because ... (he kissed her on the chin) ... who ... (he kissed her on the tip of her nose)….I want ... ... (he kissed her on the right cheek) ….is ... (he kissed her on the left cheek) ... right here ... (he kissed her on the forehead) ... in front of… (he kissed her on the chin)…. me... (he kissed her now on the lips)…"

She pretended to be trying to get away from little kisses that he was placing everywhere on her face, but, of course that she was loving that. At first, she kept her mouth closed. But it did not last too long, his tongue was struggling to get inside her mouth and it was making her very horny, so very soon she opened her mouth and he invaded to deepen the kiss.

He was holding her by the waist, very strongly. Yes, Derek Morgan knew how to conquer and tame a woman.

After about twenty minutes, they were rolling over the big bed. Of course, they were still dressed, but things were really hot, hands everywhere.

But when Morgan tried to put his right hand inside her pajama toward the breast, she stopped him, she was totally breathless:

"No, no, no, no… stop it, stop it…"

And she ran away from the bed. Leaving Morgan there, sighing in disappointment again, and reflecting about that he needed to start buying larger jeans, because the current ones were beginning to get too much tight for certain situations.

Obvious that she wanted to have sex with Derek! Who in this planet wouldn't want? But the fact that he was in love with her, adding the fact that they worked together, she just could not do it.

And Morgan knew that she wanted to have sex with him, she had confessed it already, and although he thought the sex was not the best way to win a love of a woman, at the time, it was his only chance, so he wanted so bad at least to try.

Thus, he got up from the bed and hugged her again. She tried to get rid of the hug, without success, because he was too strong for her, and he was really holding her. He said:

"Emily, please, you have to give us a chance, I know you want me too..."

She only thought, 'Damn, I want you, I want you bad, but I can not just open my legs for you and then pretend nothing happened; I wish I could.'

And then, with her wet panties and with a wild desire, she looked deeply into his eyes. She held gently his face and said:

"Derek, you can not imagine the love I feel for you… you have no idea how much you mean to me…. how much I feel safe with you ..."

Then, she started to walk around the room, and kept saying:

"…even in the field… you always go in front for me…. as if always trying to protect me…. nobody does it for me… and that means a lot... Every night, when I go to sleep, I feel so alone and…I keep thinking how I could be happy with you…. I would be able to leave my job for you…. to have a family with you…. if I could just…choose….. if I just had a… choice….. but ... guess what… love is not a choice…. and you know that…. Don't you think that I did not want to be in love with you? …to make things easier for me? … to make you happy?... But I feel like I'm already failed…. and you are just here to save me from my miserable love life…. and I just can not hold your hand and I can not let myself be saved for you…because I cannot just use you…. Do you have any idea how much this hurts?" Emily said and she was almost in tears.

Morgan leaned against the dresser with his arms crossed, digesting every word and gesture that she was making. And she kept talking:

"Yes….I was jealous of you with that blonde woman…. but it was pure selfishness…. I want you just for me, you are MY Derek Morgan….but… I ... I ... just can not give you what you want ... I can not give you my body, when what is inside… my heart… does not…. belong to you..." Her voice was cracking.

Morgan looked down and took a deep breath. He said:

"Emily… I now how you feel when we are kissing… I can feel it? What about it?"

"I'm sorry…. But I do care for you and I feel … I … it's only about sex and physical attraction…."

"…If only you would give us a chance ..." Morgan said.

"I do not want to risk our friendship…"

"Okay… Emily, I got it..."

He then approached her and gently held her head and placed a kiss on her forehead, while she whispered:

"I'm sorry…"

He left the room.

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks for reading…<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**I own nothing**

* * *

><p>It was Saturday morning when the team was in the plane coming back to Quantico from the last case. They would have the entire weekend off. Hotch saw that Emily was taking a coffee for herself and he took the opportunity to go talk to her:<p>

"…You okay…?"

She was adding an envelope of Splenda in her coffee. She looked at him, and said, smiling:

"Yes… Thanks…"

Without hesitation, he asked:

"…Jack traveled with Jessica to visit his grandparents… and… I was wondering if maybe, tonight, you want to go out… so we could just talk without the BAU walls around..."

Emily took a few seconds to process this in her mind, she thought to herself: 'Dear God, as far as I remember I'm wide awake, then, so, I could not be dreaming…. is he really asking me out for a date?'

She felt her legs going limp. Trying to control her emotions, she said:

"…Sure…"

She tried to act natural as much as possible, because inside her she was in a huge storm of emotions.

"I'll give you a call..." He said staring at her while he was leaving the small kitchen of the jet.

"Okay..."

She locked herself in the toilet to gather herself together.

* * *

><p>The team arrived at BAU. It was a Saturday, near lunch time. They just had to put away the documents of the last case.. They could wait until Monday. Garcia was there as she knew that the team would arrive soon, she was waiting for Morgan.<p>

When the elevator door opened and they walked in, Morgan could already see that she was there leaning on his desk. He said:

"Hey, baby girl, what are you still doing here?"

"Waiting for my dessert, chocolate, hot thing to take me to go out for a lunch…, you are not going to escape from me today… I'm waiting for you…" She said smiling at him.

Morgan's feelings for Garcia were like a brother and sister thing. At first, he thought that he felt for Garcia was the same thing that Emily felt for him. But he could not see himself kissing Garcia, for example, in the same way Emily kissed him. Then he stopped thinking about it.

Realizing that he would not escape from the lunch with Garcia, he agreed:

"…Sure baby girl, give me a minute… I just have to take care of some files… then we can go…"

And he really enjoyed Garcia's company.

Climbing the stairs to go to the file's room, Emily walked by Hotch, who was leaving his office to go home and she heard from him:

"I'll call you later…"

She just smiled at him as an 'okay'. Her heart was pounding fast and her legs were trembling, she thought to herself: 'C'mon, Emily… control your own body! Don't act like a stupid insecure teen, you're a grown woman…'

Luckily for them, it passed unnoticed by everybody, because Reid, JJ and Rossi had already gone home. Garcia was at Morgan's desk waiting for him, and Morgan was in the file's room.

Emily entered the file's room and Morgan was standing in front of an opened drawer, dealing with files and documents, etc.

Emily was so focused on Hotch when they arrived at BAU, that she had not realized that Morgan had gone to the file's room before her.

They stayed there for a few minutes, without talking to each other, dealing with papers. Morgan, then, broke the silence, when he was ready to leave the place:

"…Good luck tonight..." The tone of his voice was sad.

He was really sad, and he did not make any effort to hide it.

Emily's heart broke in two. She wanted to deliver a half to Morgan right there, and save the other half to give to Hotch later.

'God, how does he know?' She wondered in silence. She said:

"Derek, please…"

"That's okay, Emily… You deserve to be happy…"

"So do you…"

"…I know…. But… right now I cannot be happy… watching the woman I love (he emphasized the 'love')….. going out with another man…. Don't get me wrong… I want you to be happy... I really want... and I know that you love him… and it is your chance… but I'm sorry, I just cannot help myself…"

Morgan really had an explosive temper.

When Morgan said it all, Garcia was standing in the doorway, but neither Emily nor Morgan saw her.

'Oh ….my… GOD' ... Garcia thought. She never imagined that 'her' Chocolate God was in love with someone, especially with Emily Prentiss.

Inside the file's room, Emily's heart was really aching for Derek and for the situation. But she just did not have anything to say that could help. Before Morgan left the place, he still said to her:

"… but don't worry… I'll be able to handle this…"

Morgan said it and left the file's room, leaving Emily there completely in pieces.

Garcia was already far away from there. In fact, she wanted to vanish from there, but Morgan could reach her in time in the elevator. He said:

"…Hey, baby girl… what about our lunch?"

He had no idea that Garcia had heard part of his conversation with Emily. She said:

"No… I…You were taking too long and I... I thought that… maybe…. you were too busy… so I decided to leave ..."

"…You still want to go out for a lunch?" He asked.

"Sure..." She agreed as she could not resist his company.

* * *

><p>Emily left BAU on that Saturday. She was a little sad because of her last talk with Morgan. She was worried about his feelings. She thought: 'God, I was supposed to be so happy today… but why every time that it seems that things will start to get better for me… that I'll have a bit of happiness in my life… something bad has to happen?'<p>

She was driving home now, in her car, but shaking out the bad feelings and bad thoughts, she decided to go to the mall. She wanted a new dress and new sandals for that special night with her boss. She did not know what to expect for this night, but she wanted to do her best, for herself.

Emily was there walking through the corridors of the mall. She had never saw much sense in it: people thronging through malls, buying wildly. She could never understand that, perhaps because during her childhood her mother never had taken her to these crowded places. She never had to go to these popular places.

When she was a child and even a teenager, the clothes were the ones that were brought to Emily: dressmakers of most famous and expensive brands going to Ambassador's house. Only when she started working, she started to buy her own clothes, but yet she was always very basic.

Once that she was in the mall, she also fixed her hair: smooth, slightly curled at the tips, basic, but beautiful, soft and fragrant, and nails. She had already bought a burgundy dress, basic but very beautiful too. And she had decided not to buy new sandals. She had some good ones already for the occasion.

She was almost leaving the mall when she walked by a lingerie store. She quickly remembered that Ian always used to bring the most expensive and extravagant lingerie for her to use for him. It brought a smile to her face. Ian had his few good moments, especially in bed. He knew how to satisfy her and she missed that part.

She stopped in front of a lingerie store, looking at the models in the vitrine. She decided to enter the store, and soon, she heard:

"Hi, Can I help you?"

"Oh, no… I… I… I don't know… I'm not looking for anything specific…"

In fact, she had been dreaming of a hot night with Aaron Hotchner since a long time ago. She had really dirty thoughts with the man, but she knew that, even in her best dream, it would not happen, not tonight. Still, she wanted to buy something, just in case if a miracle happens.

"Well if you want something for daily basis, it is in that section right there...but if you want something to surprise your boyfriend, or husband, it is in this section right there..." Said the lovely girl, trying to sell something.

"Thank you…" Emily replied.

Emily stood there looking at the models of lingerie for about half an hour. She chose one finally for her to wear at night. She was holding the very small panties, red satin trimmed with black lace, extremely sexy, and the matching bra, when she felt her phone vibrating.

"Hey…." She answered the phone and he could swear that she was smiling.

Hotch could realize that she was not home since he could hear the noise of a crowded place, so he, calmly, asked:

"Where are you? Can you talk?"

Of course that she would never tell where she was: Nowhere in the planet she would tell him that she was buying lingerie for their date! She only said:

"Yeah, yeah… I can talk…I… I... I just had to stop at a place to buy food for Sergio..."

"Oh… Okay… so ... what time do I pick you up?"

She immediately thought: 'Well, for me, you can catch me right now and never let me go again'.

In fact, she said:

"…Eight is good for you?"

"Perfect…"

Then they hung up and Emily went to the cashier to pay for her little gifts.

In line to pay, Emily was holding her 'dirty little things' too damn sexy, when a young man, in his twenties, wearing his old jeans, unshaven, unkempt brown hair, and green eyes, was also standing in line in front her to pay for his things.

He turned back to look at Emily, he smiled at her, which made her a little embarrassed but she smiled back. He then looked at the content of her hands, the pieces that she was buying, and looked at her, up to down on her body, then he said, smiling at her:

"…Lucky Man…"

Emily blushed, just a little. She pretended that she had not understood what he had said. She said:

"I'm sorry?"

"…Your man... lucky man…." He said, smiling at her.

She just smiled back to him. She would not talk about her life to a stranger. No. Prentiss' would never do this.

Emily could not help but furtively look to see the things that he was buying in his hands. She saw some huge knickers, skin color. The boy said:

"…They're for my grandmother… I live with her… I take care of her… she can not come and buy, so..."

Emily just smiled and thought to herself: 'how sweet'.

The boy paid for his purchases and said goodbye to Emily, by saying:

"Have fun tonight…" and he winked at her, leaving the store.

'Injection of self esteem, it was all I needed today.' She thought to herself, almost out loud thanking him.

* * *

><p>Garcia and Morgan were at a Chinese restaurant. Both of them were acting strange. They tried to talk as if nothing was happening inside their minds, but both of them knew that something was strange and both felt their stomachs were churning and they both had bitter tastes in their mouths.<p>

Morgan, because of Emily, and Garcia because of what she had heard at the BAU.

As a profiler, Morgan could realize that something was wrong with Garcia, since that she was so happy there at BAU waiting for him and now, she looked totally devastated and sad. Then he said to her:

"Baby girl, what's wrong with you?"

Garcia had strong feelings for Morgan, but she never wanted to get in touch with what kind of feeling those were. She always totally avoided to think romantically about him, because she never thought she would have a chance. But we just could not help the way we feel.

Earlier, when she had heard, with all the letters, that Derek was in love with Emily, that hurt her a lot, much more than she would even imagine, even because she also had a special caring for Emily as well. But even though she barely was able to hide her feelings, she would not give him that. Then she replied:

"... I. .. I... just... do not like to see you this way…"

Morgan stopped eating now, he just lift up his eyes to look at her. He said:

"What way?"

"…You seem… sad ... and it saddens me too ..."

Resting cutlery on the plate, and supporting his elbows on the table, he said:

"This last case ...it was…"

"My sweet chocolate… do not lie to me…"

Garcia said that, but she was not sure if she wanted him to tell him the truth.

"Alright ... There is something…. but I do not wanna talk about it…."

"I never saw you so sad ... it breaks my heart…" She said.

"I know but...I can not help…" He said.

"Sometimes it helps to talk… to vent…... tell me, who is this evil girl that is doing this to you?"

He smiled in defeat and said:

"She is not ... Just ..." He stopped talking. He really did not want to talk about it.

"Okay... Okay… You do not wanna talk about it… but then you'll have to buy me an ice cream and we'll walking through the park and we'll play catch-up, and hide and seek, and we'll laugh during all the day ... or you can tell me who this crazy woman is that is making you so sad... and I'm going to kill her..."

Morgan opened a beautiful smile and they went to the park after the lunch. She knew how cheer him up.

* * *

><p>Once in the park, they had already taken an ice cream, played, etc. They were lying on the grass now. It was a beautiful late afternoon.<p>

Morgan was thinking: 'She (Emily) must be getting ready now ... for him…'

Garcia was thinking: 'My God make it not be what my heart is showing me as I can not fall in love with him...'

* * *

><p>Sergio was on Emily's bed, trying to sleep while she was finishing getting ready. She looked at him and said:<p>

"Serg, Am I pretty? What you think buddy?

Sergio was sleeping, so he did not make any movement.

"Come on Serg… talk to me… I need your male opinion...Will Hotch think that I'm pretty?" Emily wandered with the cat.

The cat did not understand anything, he only thought: 'this crazy woman… just let me sleep'. Cats are temperamental.

"Serg, do you think I should tell Hotch how I feel about him?"

Emily was talking to the cat while she was getting ready: dressing her clothes, sandals, jewelry, makeup, etc.

"Come on, what do you think? Should I tell him or not ..."

"Serg… Hotch is really important to me, this night can be very special to to me… it can change my future… my miserable love life… I can see if I'll take a chance or not…"

Emily always used to talk to Sergio, her cat, her faithful companion. And he was always there for her, but he didn't like to interact too much, and especially that night, Emily was talking too much, and he wanted to sleep. He then stood up on the bed and started to stretch out. And lay down again. But she kept talking:

"Serg...perhaps somewhere in the world, where it is written that I can not be happy in love...if I can figure out where it is…. I can go there and delete it… then maybe I have a chance ..."

The cat could not stand Emily talking anymore, then, he meowed. He just jumped off the bed towards the door of the bedroom. Emily frightened a little, and then she looked at him and said:

"Serg…. Ohh…. Are you jealous, sweetie… I love you…. I'll never leave you…"

The cat looked at her and thought: 'Wow, she's crazy, I don't wanna know about her love life…'

And then he left the bedroom to sleep on the couch, downstairs, in the living room, very far away from her where it was also quieter there for him.

And then, without the cat to talk to, she started talking to her thoughts, saying out loud:

'Okay, Emily, I need you to focus on Hotch tonight... Only on him… Leave Morgan to deal with on Monday, or tomorrow, he'll be fine. I need you to think only about Hotch tonight, and try to act natural and do not be to anxious with him, or act like a teenager… You're an adult and an experienced profiler, then behave yourself, control your impulses to throw yourself in his arms, and not blush if he says something more touching or kind or nice, and also try not to talk about your rotten love life...'

She, deep down, knew that none of this would work. But she always tried to make her mind.

A few time later:

Promptly at 8 in the evening, the doorbell of Emily's apartment rang. She was ready, but she still gave a last look at the mirror, just to give a last check.

She said to herself before going to open the door:

'Emily… you're an adult… self-assured… you look beautiful, wonderful, have no need for your legs to shake or to stutter...… just be yourself, okay?'

Okay. She went downstairs and opened the door wide for him. Before stepping in, he looked at her in the eyes. He had a discrete and charming smile on his mouth.

After staring into her eyes for almost one minute, he looked up and down at her body, stopping at her eyes again. She felt her face burning but she was mentally praying that her make-up would mask that she had blushed.

When he looked back at her eyes, she could not look back to him, his eyes were so wow paralyzing that she could not handle. She looked down and smiled.

He was also very well dressed in a nice suit, impeccable hair and very nice perfume. And he seemed that he had borrowed some brightness from the moon, because his eyes were so radiant that Emily just could not keep looking at them.

She could not even face him. She was sure that the moment she faced those eyes, he would be able to read her all inside, her most innermost secrets.

Realizing the effect that he just had caused in her, he said:

"Are you ready to go?"

"Ah… yes!...I'll go get my purse..."

She went to her bedroom to grab her purse, leaving him there in the living room waiting for her, totally lushed by her perfume.

In her bedroom, she took her purse and still said to herself: 'Emily, I just talked to you… please work with yourself today… you're a grown woman! It is your big chance! Don't ruin things!'

* * *

><p>On their way to the restaurant, Hotch put his pen-drive with his favorite romantic songs. Emily was discretely observing everything, every little gesture of him, and falling in love even more, as if it were possible.<p>

He had opened the door of the car for her to enter, the he closed the door. He had chosen only romantics music to play in the car. He reached out to help her to get out of the car.

Walking to the restaurant, he gently touched her backs as if guiding her. He was a perfect gentleman, much more than she could imagine in her best dreams.

Hotch had taken Emily to a restaurant on the top floor of the most fancy Hotel in town. One part of the restaurant had an outdoor space. It was a really nice evening, very starry sky and a beautiful full moon. The chair was made by quilted red velvet. Of course that he pulled the chair for her to sit

Emily was feeling like if it were not her that was there, or like if she could just wake anytime, being everything just a dream. But it was real, it was real!

"It's ... very ... beautiful here!" She said, while she was sitting.

"You deserve much more ..." He said, while he was also sitting, on a chair, in front of her.

She could not believe she was listening to that, she wanted to open her mouth, but she had made an intensive training to prevent this habit, not today! She thought. And then she just smiled and said:

"Thank you ..."

Emily could see the full moon but not Hotch as had turned his neck to get to see it. They sat facing each other. Emily, then, said:

"Wow… look at this full moon… I never see it so beautiful… just give a look ..."

She realized that Hotch did not turn to look at the moon and continued staring at her in the eyes, slightly smiling. She insisted:

"Look at the moon ..." She said softly.

He continued staring at her in the eyes without saying anything, then he said:

"Why I would look at the moon when I have a stunning beautiful woman right here in front of me…" He said, mostly whispering.

Now Emily could not help herself, and her mouth opened wide:

"Oooooooo" ... "Hotch" ... she said, a little embarrassed.

"Aaron..." He corrected her, smiling.

He could not take his eyes off of hers as she was really getting a little embarrassed. She did not want him to 'read' her so soon. Hotch realized what he was causing her, and decided that she deserved a bit of the sincerity from his part. Then his right hand touched hers on the table. He said:

"Look at me..."

She took courage and she looked at him in the eyes. He said:

"I really waited too long for a moment like this... with you…"

Now it was her that was trying to 'read' him in the eyes and seeing that he was really opening his heart. He kept saying:

"When you first opened my office's door and said, smiling: 'Agent Hotchner?', I said to myself: 'wow'…you instantly got me hypnotized..."

"Good evening, you're welcome, Can I write down the order?"

Emily wanted to kill the waiter at this time. She sighed. If she could, she would throw him from the top of that building.

Hotch, then, chose the beverages, he asked Emily what she wanted to drink, and they opted for red wine. They also accepted the suggestion offered by the waiter for dinner. Though, they were not there to eat, so anything was good. Emily prayed in silence for the waiter to move away soon. She wanted to return to that same point in the conversation where he left off.

The waiter finally walked away. Hotch said:

"…You'll like this wine… it is one of the best that I've ever tasted ..."

She got frustrated. How so? Wines? She did not want to talk about wines, but she smiled back to him.

The waiter came with the wine and walked away again. They toasted. Hotch said:

"…To us…"

She smiled back, saying:

"It's really good…"

For Emily's frustration, Hotch took too long to regain the conversation. During dinner, they talked about music, art, films, very little about the BAU in general, a little more about Jack.

The night was really nice. Hotch wanted so much to talk to Emily about his feelings. He was in love with her. But it took too long for him to assume it for himself. And of course, he would not just drop it to her so easily. Especially that she had not spoken a word about how she felt about him, even though he knew.

He finally said:

"…Emily, as I was saying before ..."

Emily was no longer expecting him to return to that subject, so she was totally blindsided. Her heart was paced all over her body and seemed not be able to find its way back to place.

"... The first time I saw you… my heart recognized you as its owner ... and ... since then ... I've lived a life apart from it ... I tried ... I tried to convince my heart otherwise ... but it looks like it has its own life ... I've been struggling to control it, to control my feelings….but it is getting difficult and difficult ... I'm pretty sure this is called love..." He concluded with a smile forming dimples.

Emily was trying to assimilate everything that Hotch was saying to her. Love had always been a very complicated issue for her. She had been in love before, with Ian, but Ian was unlike anything, he could not be compared, so it was a new situation for her here.

The situation that she just had to allow herself to be happy: But things had never been easy like this for her, so she was kind of lost. Although Emily knew that he knew about her love for him, she wanted to tell him, and she had just decided to do that today since he was being so honest with her.

She also wanted to ask if he'd broken up with Beth, but she was not sure how to do it because a strong woman never brings other women for the subject. But, however, she did not want to bring the subject called 'Beth', it came by itself.

When Emily was ready to open her mouth to declare her love for him, she that saw Hotch was reaching his cell phone that was in his pocket, so she waited for him to answer the call.

Hotch looked at the phone and frowned. He wanted turn it off but he could not. So he decided to not answer it, putting the cell phone back in his pocket. He could not turn it off because Jack could call him anytime. He looked at Emily and she said:

"…Something wrong?"

"No…"

Then, Emily decided to open her heart:

"Aaron… I…"

She saw that he was reaching his cell phone again in the pocket. It was Beth again! He looked at Emily and he thought to himself, 'I can not answer it in front of her.' Then he put the phone back on his pocket, he looked at her and said:

"I'm sorry…"

"…That's okay..."

But the magic of the moment had been completely broken.

Emily wasn't sure about who was calling, but she had an idea, then she said:

"If you need to go ..."

Of course that she was dying of hatred inside.

And the phone was still vibrating like crazy again in his pocket. Hotch then had no choice. He answered it without even thinking, because if he stopped one second to think, he would throw the cell phone to the moon. He heard a crying voice on the other side of the line.

"Aaron? Pl. .. please .. it's my mother ..."

"What happened?" He asked, dryly.

"She fell down the stairs… I'm here in the hospital with her… I think she is going to die… they just told me that the surgery is a big risk for her and that she might not make it alive, please, I'm alone here ... come here .. .. p .. please ..." Beth's voice was fading.

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading! And now? Will Hotch leave Emily there alone in the restaurant? I wouldn't!<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

** I own nothing**

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><p>In the middle of their romantic dinner, Hotchner got a call from a desperate woman on the other side of the line:<p>

"My mother! She fell down the stairs… I'm here in the hospital with her… I think she is going to die… they just told me that the surgery is a big risk for her and that she might not make it alive, please, I'm alone here ... come here .. .. p .. please ..." Beth's voice was fading.

"Where are you?" He asked.

She said the address and Hotch said:

"I'm on my way…"

Hearing this, Emily's heart broke, not in two pieces, but in thousand. She was hoping that it was for Jack that he would leave Emily there in the restaurant, but deep down, she knew it was not, because if it was, Hotch would had attended at the first time.

He then hung up the phone, and he looked at Emily and said:

"I'm sorry…"

To escape from having to look at her breaking into a thousand pieces in front of him, because of him, he turned to wave to the waiter to ask for the bill.

Emily said nothing, but she thought: 'No! He will not leave me here in the middle of the dinner and run to her, MY GOD, it can not be happening'. Her thoughts were running in her mind, and she wanted to cry, but of course, not in front of him, then she stopped short of thinking.

He paid the bill and they left the restaurant. She wanted to run away from there, disappear actually, she was feeling humiliated. Hotch was hating having to do it, but Beth, she had no one, she lived with her mother and she had only her mother in her life. He knew how much she would be suffering. When they reached Hotch's car, Emily said:

"If you want… I can get a cab." She was desperate to disappear.

"No, Emily, of course not...I'll take you home…" He replied.

She was dying to vanish. In front of the hotel, there were dozens of taxis parked available for the clients of the Hotel and the restaurant, so she said:

"No, Hotch, I prefer…"

And even before saying this, she ran towards the taxi and entered it. She never said goodbye, anything, not even looking back at him.

Hotch punched in his own car in protest, he was also frustrated and sad and angry. He went to the damn hospital.

* * *

><p>At the hospital, Hotch was still nervous, upset, he walked towards to the emergency room. Beth was there and she said to him as soon as she saw him:<p>

"I am so sorry that I called you... but ... I just have nobody ..."

She was crying, she threw herself in his arms.

"How is she?" Hotch said referring to her mother.

"She's still in surgery, she fell down the stairs and hit her head, it's a brain surgery ..."

After a little while when she was calmer, she said to him:

"Aaron ... I can not lose her ..."

Hotch did not know what to say as he did not want even to be there, but the poor girl, he worked hard to try to put himself in her place, so he just hugged her.

Seeing that he was all tidy and smelling his perfume, he asked:

"Where were you?"

"It does not matter…Let's focus on your mother okay?" He said coldly.

She did not insist as she was really worried about her mother, but of course that she would take advantage of the situation.

* * *

><p>Morgan relaxing at home, watching MMA fights on TV, there were several cans of beer all over the TV room, also some peanuts scattered on the floor, even his dog was already sick of eating peanuts now. That was the scenario when the doorbell rang.<p>

He was a little surprised that someone was there at the door because of the hour, it was almost midnight. He looked through the peephole, then he sighed and he opened the door, wide, as if, deep down, he was already waiting for it to happen.

He looked at her. Her eyes were swollen and red, just like her cheeks. He just opened her arms for her and he brought her to a big and strong hug, at the same time, he locked the door.

They stood there for a few minutes, only hugging each other. Emily had her head stuck in his chest, she allowed herself to cry a little.

She broke the hug, and walked around the room. Then she sat on the couch, leaning her elbows on her legs, covering her face with both of her hands. He sat on the couch, very close to her. He brought her to his chest again, making circles with the palm of his hand all over her backs, trying to calm her down.

And she allowed herself to cry again, until she was calmer.

After about ten minutes this way, Derek broke the silence, asking:

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

After a few seconds, she answered:

"No…"

Then, she said:

"I'm sorry that I came here…"

Emily knew she it was not right she run to Morgan whenever she needed. Not with him being in love with her. She could not use him like this. She knew that she had been irresponsible going there that night, but she just could not help herself, she needed to feel loved, desired from someone in this fucking Earth, and in Morgan's warm arms, she felt totally loved.

With both hands, he held her face very gently, and he looked into her eyes, very close, and said:

"You can always count on me...Always!"

They stayed there for a while. Morgan was comforting her and she managed to calm herself down.

They were just like the old days of friendship. He wanted to take a step forward with her, but he would not take advantage of her weaknesses, not today, so he only played the 'helpful friend' line.

After hours, they were watching a very funny old and stupid movie on TV. They both were very comfortable on the same couch, as he was massaging her feet.

Suddenly, her cell phone beeped with a text, she swallowed and looked at Morgan, he looked at her, too, and then she took the cell phone in hands to read the message.

_{Again I'm sorry, I promise to make it up to you, if you give me a chance… Aaron.}_

Emily did not answer the message. She did not even have an answer to him right now. She was very deeply hurt. She looked at Morgan and said:

"Derek… it's getting too late… I need to go home…."

Emily was really in love with Aaron, but, at the same time, she felt so right that she was there, in that moment, with Morgan. She felt so safe with him that when Hotch sent that message, she had been automatically brought back to her cruel reality, and for that person that would suppose to make her feel loved.

Morgan looked at her and said nothing.

"Can you call a cab for me?" She said, softly.

"Emily, you can stay here… Tomorrow is Sunday and I can drive you home..."

"Derek… is not necessary at all ..."

"Okay… but then I'll drive you ..."

"No, I will not get you out of your home at this time of night…"

"So you stay here ..."

"Okay...then…"

Then, Morgan took Emily to the guest room, which also had a private bathroom. Emily was in the bathroom now. She was looking at her own image in the mirror and recording the events of that night, the beautiful things that Hotch had told to her. She was calmer now and serene, and no more tears in her eyes.

She was trying to compartmentalizing. She took her mental boxes and kept all the bad happenings inside them, including the doubts that she still had and that was hammering in her head: 'Did he had broke up with Beth? What had happened that made him left me in the middle of dinner? Why did not he tell me the reason or gave me a explanation?' So she boxed everything and tried to relax.

When she left the bathroom, she saw a white shirt on the bed, it was Morgan's. He had left there for her to sleep in. She smiled at his gesture. She changed her clothes and lay down, but she took a long time to get to sleep.

After about a half an hour that she was still trying to sleep, she heard two light taps on the door:

"I am awake, come in" ... She said.

Then Morgan opened the door and put just his face in and say:

"Just wanted to say good night…"

"Come here…" She asked softly and sexy voice

O-b-v-i-o-u-s-l-y that he went.

Morgan then tried hard to control his mind and his male instincts and his thoughts to not keep remembering that she was wearing his T-shirt and that she was only in her panties, and he sat on the edge of the bed near her.

She looked him in his eyes and said:

"Thank you ..."

"For what?"

"For being my friend, for understanding me, for taking care of me, for saving my life, for… and I could spend a lifetime listing things... and it would not be enough…"

"I do all of this because I love you…"

She smiled at him, preferring to think that he was referring to friendship only. And he did not want to prolong the subject because he did not want make her feel bad about not loving him back. Not today. She had already had her quota of suffering for the night.

Then he just stayed there quietly, just holding her hand. The room was dark, there was only the moonlight coming through the crack of the window pane.

It was full moon night and the sky was lit. After a few minutes Emily said:

"I was so focused on me that I did not ask… how was your lunch with Garcia?"

Morgan was a little surprised with the question. He replied:

"Garcia is great ... She always makes me laugh, she always makes me feel better..."

"Unlike me…" Emily said, bitterly.

"I won't even answer to this…" Morgan said.

"Garcia is the best ...You know…. she likes you" ... Emily said.

"I know ... I like her too ..." Morgan said.

"Yeah….but…. I think she likes you in a different way"...

"What do you mean?"... Morgan looked at her curiously.

Emily did not want to deliver Garcia's secrets to Morgan. Garcia had not confirmed that she was in love with Morgan, so she could not do it with her friend. So she just played:

"I think she likes you…romantically speaking…"

"Oh….no… no… of course not, we're like brothers and sisters…" Morgan said.

Emily thought for a moment and decided to stay quiet. She did not want to give the impression that she was throwing him in Garcia's arms. He was being so nice to her and she did not want to hurt him even more.

Then Morgan started to caress her on the hair, putting some strands of her hair behind her ear and he said:

"I think I'm going to let you sleep…"

Emily was feeling so good and comforted by him that she did not let go of his hand and she asked:

"Derek… I know this is too much to ask, but… can you stay with me all night… just to hold me in your big strong arms… nothing more… I know this is unfair for you but I need that just for tonight…"

He only smiled at her as a big yes, but he knew nothing else would happen. He joined her under the duvets, hugging her from behind. She made herself very comfortable in his arms, trying hard to not think about Hotch.

Emily then closed her eyes, holding his hand that was around her waist. Feeling his body so close to hers, feeling his breathing, she could almost feel his heart beating so close they were.

She started to caress him on the arm, very gently, almost not touching him, under the duvet. Morgan could not resist, as he was holding her from behind, he started to kiss her on the neck, ear, etc. At the same time that he was trying to make the rest of his body to keep a certain distance from her ass to not scare her as he was getting really horny.

Feeling the good sensations that his tongue was giving to her, touching her on the ear lobe, from behind, she wondered: 'oh, God, the things he could to with his soft tongue on the rest of my body… please, God… help me…'

She then could not resist. She turned to face him. She could see the light of the moon reflecting on his face. He was staring at her into her eyes. She could see all the desire and the lust in his eyes. And she did not care if she could not see love. She did not want to stop to think about 'love' right now. They knew it! They knew everything: They knew that it was wrong and that maybe it would not have a turn back point, but they just could not help themselves! The sensations for both of them were too damn good for them to stop.

Emily held gently his face and approached him, in a way she could feel his breathing and see every pore of his face. Her lips touched his, her heart started to pound fast and she waited and waited not more than one second for Derek to kiss her like crazy on the mouth.

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks for reading… well… where this 'innocent' kiss will lead? <strong>


	8. Chapter 8

**I own nothing**

* * *

><p>In the heat of the moment, after being deprecated by Hotch, in which it was supposed to be the best night of her life, Emily found herself in a warm and strong arms, as she could not resist but surrender to his kisses and caresses. They knew that this was wrong and that things between them could not go too far. But how far did they have already went?<p>

They were kissing each other in the mouth, but the crazy kiss of the beginning had given place to a soft and wet kiss, as if savoring each other's taste by the tongue. It was too fucking good!

While kissing her, Derek gently ran his hand inside the T-shirt that she was wearing, very slowly, from her waist, belly, towards to her breast, very gently and slowly, as if feeling each inch of her body. Morgan could realize that her skin was shivering by his soft touch. He could feel it in her skin. They didn't break the kiss at any moment. He, then, still under the T-shirt, reached the place that made him feel like he was in heaven: her soft breasts at the same time that her nipples were hard.

It was getting really hard for him to control himself anymore and his male instincts. He knew that he had to do his best with her. He knew that that woman was not anything like the zillion other women that he did had in his life being a player. No. That was Emily Prentiss: The badass that use to chase bad guys in a very efficient way, sometimes even better than him. That was the strong and powerful woman that had inhabited his most spicy and dirty daydreams, and his most crazy dreams as well, yes, because he had already dreamed about putting a ring in her finger of a left hand.

But as the male mind does not work like the females ones, and it comes a time when men just cannot think anymore with their brain, especially having an Emily Prentiss in his arms. After a long time kissing her on the mouth, he wanted more, he wanted her, he wanted to taste her entire body, not only the mouth. So he motioned to get rid of her T-shirt because he was dying to prove her magic perfect boobs.

It was enough for her to break the kiss, letting go a small moan, as if 'no'.

Morgan then stopped all his movements to look at her in the eyes. He was over her in the bed as she almost could not move. Almost holding her there with the weight of his body, he thought to himself:

'No, not today, Emily…'

It would be the third time that she would stop them from making love.

They shared an intense look and he could see in her eyes that she was freaking out. He could almost read in her dark eyes under the reflection of the moon light: it was not going to happen.. Then before she could ask him to get out, he said:

"Emily, I know you do not love me… but I love you so much… please… let it be enough for tonight…lets just live in the moment… I can feel that you want it as much as me... There is nothing wrong with both of us expressing our desires for each other… Please… no guilt tonight… just pure enjoyment and pleasure… we both are free as we are not committed to anybody else… I know you had a date tonight and the things did not go as planned and that something happened to hurt you and that is why you are here… I am not taking advantage of anything… I just want to show how much I care and love you… Let me show you…"

"Derek… I want you so badly too… but if we do this, we are going to ruin what we have which is the most precious thing that is our friendship as you know my true feelings... and I don't want to hurt you… If we take this step, we will not be able to regain our friendship ever again…I cannot just use you… I think you're hot and sexy and … of course that I want you… of course that I want to feel you… and feel loved by someone…I'm only human… but as much I want to make love to you… I don't want to risk losing you as my dear and best friend…"

"You're never going to lose me… I promise, Emily… please…Let me love you…"

"You really think that we are going to act as if nothing had happened after making love? Are you really saying that you can make love to me and still pretend that nothing happened the next day and for the rest of our lives?"

Derek then broke the eyes contact. She insisted, asking gently:

"Answer me…"

He looked at her and said:

"No… I could never do that…" He said and it was more a whisper in defeat.

Derek then rolled off her, laying next to her now, taking both of his hands on his face for a moment. He knew, from that point he knew that it would not happen. Not tonight.

Seeing how much devastated and frustrated he was, she sat on the bed to look at him and said:

"I'm sorry… I should never have come here tonight…"

He took his hands off his face and still lying down, he looked at her. Then he quickly sat on the bed too, and gently held her face to say:

"Yes, you should… I'll always be here for you…"

He then, kissed her on the forehead and hugged her, saying:

"Let's go back to the initial plan, then? …Sleeping hugging each other, like siblings?"

Still with her head between his hands, she smiled: it was so good to have a person like him in her life. She said:

"Are you sure?"

He looked at her and said:

"More than sure…"

Derek then had a very hard time to control his feelings and his body, as he wanted to have her so badly that his and desire for her was overwhelming that he could explode in insanity, anytime soon. He just wanted a chance. But he knew that it would not happen, and for the worst, he still had her in his arms.

Emily fell asleep soon as all her problems were all very well boxed in her mind.

Morgan took a little longer to sleep. He wanted to enjoy the feeling of sleeping with her in his arms. He was afraid to sleep and waste this precious moment.

* * *

><p>On the next morning, he woke up earlier than usual that he used to for a Sunday. He went to the kitchen to prepare a nice breakfast for her.<p>

Emily opened her eyes and looked around and well it was not her bedroom. Soon, she remembered the happenings of the night before. She was not sad as she was thinking she would be. Or contrary: she had a smile on her face, and strangely she was feeling happy. She stretched on the bed. Then she got up and went to the bathroom for her personal hygiene.

When she was leaving the bathroom, she saw that her cell phone was ringing. She thought for a moment and then she decided to answer to it. She had seen that it was Hotch and his smile on the screen by even so she answered with a cold and distant:

"Prentiss…"

"Emily… good morning…" He said.

"Hey…"

"Emily… again… I'm so sorry for yesterday… please… I will explain everything… and for now… I ask you to only think about what I said to you during our dinner… it was all true … I'm your boss and I've been struggling and denying this feeling for myself as a boss I know that it's wrong… but I want to try… so all I ask you is that you keep in your mind and in your heart all the things that I said to you…"

She was only listening while she was biting her lips, typical!

When she realized that he had stopped talking, she only said:

"I… I don't even know what to think…"

"I know… just keep in mind that… that… I love you…"

She thanked the heavens now that he was not there to see her reaction to this: she opened her mouth and frowned and her breathing became fast, in short: she was paralyzed! Hotch then said:

"Emily?"

She still took a few seconds to gather herself together again and come back to the Earth planet. She said:

"I… I'm here…"

"Okay… well… I have to go now… I just came home now in the morning and I still have to go to pick Jack up… Take care…"

"Okay…"

Of course that this 'I love you' that she had just heard brought a lot of new information to her. But she decided to deal with it later. Now, she was starving as she had eaten practically nothing during the fateful dinner.

She went downstairs. Entering the kitchen, she saw Morgan dealing with some oranges to make juice. She said:

''Good morning…''

"Good morning princess… did you sleep well?''

''Yes…'' She said, stretching again.

"The smell is delicious ...''

They had breakfast and they didn't talk about anything that had happened the night before, much less about the almost 'lovemaking'.

* * *

><p>About an hour later, she was in the bathroom to change her clothes. She took off Morgan's T-shirt, and dressed her bra that she had bought especially for last night. She knew that Hotch would not see it, but it was for him. She thought to herself: 'Well, I think this satin red with black lace did not give me luck', and she drafted a smile.<p>

She was in her bra and panties now, hyper-super sexy, in the bathroom, but the dress was on a chair in the bedroom, so she left the bathroom. But when she stepped in the bedroom she could see Morgan there. He almost fell down his legs seeing her like that. He froze as he was paralyzed. Then he gathered himself together, well, he tried, but he was still in shock. Yes, he had touched her, but it was dark and he almost could not see her, it was a very different situation now, under the sun light. He said:

"I... I… I'm sorry ... I just ... I. .. I. .. I'm sorry ..."

He just vanished quickly from there otherwise he would not be responsible for his actions as he could grab her right there. He had seen more than ten hundred women in their underwear, but he never felt like that.

Emily was a little embarrassed, just a little. She put on her dress and left the bedroom. Morgan was there sitting on the couch waiting for her as he would go to drive her home. He said:

"Emily, I'm sorry again ... I was there to say that if you wanted to keep my clothes… that you could... I did not ..."

"Relax, Derek everything is okay...…as far as I remember you were touching my entire body just a few hours ago… so it is not an unknown territory for you…"

Morgan just looked down. She said:

"Sorry… I should not be mentioning this…"

* * *

><p>Morgan was driving her home, when the cell phone of both of them beeped with a message: 'BAU, urgent!' It was JJ.<p>

Morgan, then, took Emily to her place and went back to his place to get his go bag.

* * *

><p>While Emily was packing and taking a shower and changing clothes, she was talking to Sergio, who was lying in her bed:<p>

"Serge, my date with Hotch ... well ... I did not work out the way I wanted... I'm so sad buddy…but I'll tell you later about it, okay ... now ... we have a case… it's Sunday!... Aghh! ... I hope it's nothing too horrific…"

The cat only opened his eyes, just a little, to look at her. He did not make any movement.

"Serg, buddy, I do not know if I want to see Hotch today…I mean… well… we have a case and I will have to see him… but so soon, after yesterday night… oh… this sucks…"

She was talking to the cat all the time as she was in an urge to vent, and there were things that she could not talk about everything that she wanted with Morgan. So, the cat was the only one in the planet that really knew how she really felt. Soon, she went out towards the BAU, and the cat thanked the heavens.

* * *

><p>As a good or bad luck of fate, Morgan and Emily arrived at the same time at the BAU, and entered the elevator together. On the BAU's floor, they left the elevator and came face to face with Garcia, who was walking on the hall with some papers in her hands.<p>

"Morning… baby girl…'' Morgan said.

'"Morning, Pen…" Emily said smiling at her friend.

Garcia looked at Morgan and smiled at him, then, she looked at Emily and left the place without answering going towards to her office after handing some files to them.

Emily was a little sadly surprised that Garcia had not greeted her, and Morgan did not notice anything.

They team was now in the meeting room, while JJ started presenting the case. Emily's heart was restless because Hotch was not there. She mentally prayed that someone would ask why he was not there. She would not do that, never! Finally, after the case had been presented, Reid asked to JJ:

"Where is Hotch?"

Emily did not look at them as she was writing something, but she opened her ears wide to listen.

"He had a personal problem… he won't come…" JJ merely said.

Trying to disguise her thinking that was on Hotch, still about the case, Emily said:

"If children are just disappearing for some months after their bodies are found… they must have been used for something specific..."

"…Some people think that is normal to use other people…" Garcia said looking straight at Emily in the eyes.

Emily then looked at Penelope, she understood nothing and remained quiet. That was a little weird for all of them as Garcia never used to palpitate about cases as she was not even a profiler. But they were all so focused now on the next case, especially because it involved children, that they did not value that too much.

"Wheels up in 30..." Rossi said, leaving the meeting room.

The rest of the team was leaving the place, Emily called Garcia:

"Hey Pen, is everything okay?" Emily said softly.

"…With me? Yes! …What about you?"

"Yeah..." Emily gave a bitter smile. Definitely that was not the Garcia that she used to be.

* * *

><p>The team traveled without Hotch, but he was trying to coordinate the actions of the team from distance. He was always in contact with Morgan and Rossi, or JJ.<p>

Emily was interviewing one of victim's parents, when she felt her cell phone vibrate with a message, she immediately grabbed the phone: it could be something related to the case. She saw it was a message from Hotch, well, it could be related to the case too. The message was:

_'I have not stopped thinking about you, even for a minute. I'll explain everything, I promise. Aaron.'_

She sighed and quickly got back to her activities. She had no time for this right now. Not with so many children to be saved. She did not even return the message.

The next day, they were all gathered at the police station. They were close to catching the UNSUB. Emily's cell phone rang. She looked at the display to see who it was. She was very surprised with the face that she saw on the screen: Clyde's face. She was very surprised but she did not answer to it.

It had been almost a year that they had met again for the last time, because of the Ian's episode. But, since then, they had not spoken to each other anymore. Clyde kept insisting on the phone call, but she did not answer. He kept insisting as he knew that she was stubborn, and he knew he had to insist until she answers. He knew that she could be working, but he also wanted to talk to her. And he was also very temperamental, he wanted the things and he wanted for yesterday!

Emily was getting nervous. She could be too damn stubborn, but he was much, much more, so she walked to get a little far away from the team and answered to it:

"I'm working on a case… what do you want?"

He could realize that she was pissed off. He loved it! He said:

"Aw… I missed your sweet way…" He knew she could get even more pissed, he loved!

"Clyde… it's serious… I'm working… what do you want?"

"I'm sorry that I missed your funeral ..." He said sarcastically.

"So, you are not surprised..." She said.

"Of course not… keeping both eyes on my best agents is a skill of mine… especially in a hot one like you..."

"I can not talk too much now… what do you want?"

"I'm in D.C… I need to talk with you."

"Well I'm not… I'll call you when I get there… Bye."

Then she hung up.

Clyde smiled and hung up. Emily was definitely a tough cookie, but he always like the challenge of taming her.

The team took two days more to solve that case and save the kids that were still missing. They then went back to Quantico.

* * *

><p>It was a Wednesday, at night.<p>

Emily was in the comfort of her home, on the couch, locked in her own world, relaxing, watching old stuff on TV, trying not to access her mental boxes. Luckily for Sergio, she was quiet and in silence now.

It was about eight o'clock at night when she heard the doorbell ringing. She was almost falling asleep as she was startled a little by the sound of the door bell. She then got up and looked through the peephole: Hotch!

She was not expecting this at all. She was wearing an old t-shirt and gym shorts.

She thought for a little while, biting her lip, and she finally opened the door, with a not 'very welcome' face. He said:

"Hi, Can I come in?"... He said, and he was holding a bouquet of red roses.

She just opened the door wide now, in a sign for him to enter.

He entered and went straight to the living room, apace, and certain, typical Aaron Hotcher, still holding the huge bouquet in hands.

She closed the door and went after him, turning off the TV, and crossing her arms, without saying anything but showing how much she was anxious to listen to things from him. He reached the bouquet for her and said:

"This is for you…"

Still with her arms crossed, she looked at those beautiful flowers. She was so pissed that she wanted to step on them, but, poor flowers, it was not their fault, so so she decided to take the flowers to put them in a vase. She said only:

"Thank you…"

She took the flowers to the kitchen to put them in the water. She came back to the living room, saying to him:

"Have a seat ..."

He sat on a couch, and she on another one. At that moment, Sergio got up and went to sleep in the bedroom. He did not want to hear this conversation.

"Emily, look, once again I apologize for what happened on Saturday ... …I want to tell you everything…"

"I'm all ears"... Emily said, sarcastically.

Typical cold and controlled Aaron Hotcher way, he started to talk:

"It was Beth on the phone ..."

Emily smiled bitterly, thinking: 'of course' ... She said nothing and waited for him to continue.

"…Her mother had suffered a domestic accident on Saturday night… she was with her mother at the hospital… her mother was in surgery… and she had no one to run to..."

Emily was listening, but that was hard for her to swallow. It seemed a pretty typical story of love triangles, and so far she was feeling like she was "the other" in history, more like an intruder. And he realized it.

Hotch said that but he realized that this talk would not lead to anything, as he had to take off the focus from Beth and put it on Emily. Then he stopped talking. He sat down on the same couch as her now, and said, staring at her in the eyes:

"Look, Emily, that was supposed to be our night… our special night that I've been waiting for so long… for my lifetime I think…at that moment… she called me… it seemed to be the right thing to do… to support her…"

"Of course, running to rescue your girlfriend ... I think I can understand that ..." She said, ironically, and she did not intend to mask the irony.

"She is not my girlfriend…"

As if this last information had added nothing to the talk, she got up from the couch and walk across the living room, approaching the big window, looking outside, hugging herself. She did not want to look at him for him to see how hurt/pissed she was.

At that moment, Hotch realized the size of the damage that he had done. She was Emily Prentiss! Nobody mess with Emily Prentiss's feelings.

He got up from the couch, walked after her, but not too close and as she had her backs to him now, he asked:

"Emily, look at me…"

She was looking through the large window, with her arms crossed. He waited for her to turn to look at him and continued talking:

"Do you really think I'd invite you for a date…. And had said those things that I told to you… if I was still dating Beth?"

She broke the eye contact and bit her lip, and remained in silence.

"Because if you think this about me… you really do not know me at all..."

"You had told me nothing about it ..." She said, in defense.

"Emily ... do you believe that I could go out with you and tell about my feelings for you and be still dating her?"

"I don't know… ... I don't know what it was about….our date..." She was lost in her words.

"Emily, after the things that I told to you… after I tell you how I feel about you ... you still don't know what this is about?"

He was always calm and controlled but he was getting sad and disappointed.

Of course that she knew what was that about, but her insecurity was screaming inside her so loudly. She said:

"You did leave me in the middle of dinner to go running to her..."

He was trying hard to remain calm, but his tone of voice could show all the disappointment, he said:

"And…about that night…this is the only thing that you remember?"

She did not answer, and somehow she was feeling like she was the wrong in the story. He said:

"I came here to apologize again….to see if we could continue from the point we stopped…..I spent so many years keeping this feeling just for me…..when I met you for the first time, I was still married…..then, came the divorce…. and so many things happened…..we work together….and we know the rules of the BAU on relationships…there are so many impediments...but guess what Emily….I don't want to have a life separate from my own heart anymore ... ..do you have any idea what it is like to live with your own heart outside your chest?... I don't want to live like that anymore…..and I was ready to risk everything….for you..."

"You running to her made me feel rejected…"

"I've already explained the reasons ... and just for you to know… her mother passed away ... and all these days… I was helping with the things for the funeral..."

Emily's eyes widened hearing this, and she opened her mouth a little as if to say something but in fact she was only digesting that information. After a few moments, she said:

"I'm so sorry…"

And now Emily saw that he was being accused by her because of a teen jealousy when he was really trying to help someone. She then said:

"I had no way of knowing what was happening..."

"I know… That's why I'm here telling you everything…"

She was feeling so sad because of the dinner; but after all that Hotch had just said to her, she felt worse. She was thinking that he was still dating Beth.

She was feeling like a complete idiot right now, acting like a teenager with jealousy's crisis.

And now she was standing there in front of him without any reaction and he was so disappointed with her that he thought that it was not a good moment to continue talking. Okay: she had no way to know what was happening, but, indeed: she had to trust him, no matter what. Yeah: that was his thinking.

He broke the silence and said:

"Well….I think I should go..."

And he walked towards the door. Emily was so ashamed of herself that she could not open her mouth to say anything. Her feet seemed glued to the floor.

Hotch was really determined to leave now. He needed to think and his last few days had not been easy. He gave only two steps toward the door and turned to look at Emily again as she was still planted on the ground.

He decided to give them one last chance. It would be the last chance, because he was willing to pretend that none of this had happened, so he said:

"Do you have something to say?"

It seemed that this question had brought her back to the reality, as if it had brought back to her a last chance to breathe. She said:

"Yes..."

Then she took a few steps to approach him, very close, and gently held his face, staring at him in the eyes and said:

"I love you…" It was more a whisper, almost without a sound, but her eyes were screaming all that love that was saved inside her, for him.

Telling him so openly these three little words, she felt completely naked. She was giving him more than everything, she was giving him her heart and soul, and that meant a lot for an Emily Prentiss. It had no point of return.

Listening to these three words, Hotch was in the heaven. He had always been completely sure about Emily's love for him since a long time ago, but he doubted that, one day, he would hear it from her, so directly, so sincere

He could almost feel his heart making its path back to his chest, after long years without feeling it. And it not only returned to his chest: it had paced around all his body first, finally finding the right place.

His eyes were smiling now. He pulled Emily into a big hug, as she still seemed to be without a ground now.

During the hug with her warm body, his heart found the right rhythm, and managed to calm down, as if for the first time in his life it was in the right place.

Incredibly Emily felt exactly the same thing. She looked at him in the eyes again as he was also staring at her in the eyes. Then he looked at her mouth that was slightly open, and he kissed her on the lips, the kiss was soft at the beginning but then it started to get deeper and deeper as if they were starving of each other.

Without breaking the kiss, they walked to the couch. He sat on the couch and she sat over him, in front of him, placing one leg on each side of his body, as of hugging his body with her legs and arms, while they were still kissing.

Their bodies were stuck together, separated only by their clothes. Emily could feel Hotch's body reactions as she was sitting on his lap. Suddenly, she broke the kiss only to get rid of her own t-shirt, and she did it staring straight into his eyes.

She was wearing a basic black bra that was very far from resembling the one she had brought especially for the occasion of the first time with him. Hotch's mouth opened a bit by staring at the flesh of her breast that was showing so close to his face, and she took that his mouth was opened to continue the hot kisses.

Realizing that things were really hot now and both of them were really horny, as a gentleman that he was, he broke the kiss to ask her:

"Are you sure about this?"

"Absolutely sure…" She said, in the most sexy way possible.

Then she whispered into his ear:

"I want you inside me right now…"

Hotch's body reacted to this almost instantly.

Her legs wide open around his body. He had both of his hands on her thighs, and buried his head between her breasts, licking the exposed flesh of her breast, while he reached the clasp of her bra on her backs to opened it.

He took off her bra, letting it fall on the floor.

He took a few seconds only to look at them. Her perfect boobs all there only for him. Those two perfect boobs and her hard nipples only for him. She was staring at him while he was admiring her perfect boobs.

As he could not resist anymore, 'calm and controlled' now had given place to a wild and insane side of him, and he started to lick her nipples while she was moaning and holding gently his head as if to guide him. And he sucked harder, driving Emily completely crazy of pleasure.

They stood there on the couch, delivered to pleasure, red faces, panting, groaning and without air for a few moments more. Recovering his breathing, Hotch got up from the couch with her around his waist, and climbed the stairs towards her room, specifically her bed.

In the bedroom, Serge was there in the middle of the bed, sleeping. When the poor cat saw that scene, he freaked out. He thought:

"Wow, this crazy woman… as if she was enough for me to handle with, and the other guy that is always here… now this!"

And the cat vanished from there because he would not want to see what would happen there.

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading… leave your comment and suggestions please…<strong>


	9. Chapter 9

**Guys, I have read the comments from you, and I know 90% of you want Demily in the end. I was sad when some of you said that you would give up reading and stuff.. But please do not do this because Morgan is a big part of this story too. I'm even considering changing the end, but I'm not promising that. Well, I hope you do not give up. And a very special thanks to all who are reading.**

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><p><strong>I own nothing.<strong>

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><p>Entering Emily's bedroom with her in his arms, without even breaking the kiss, he knew that it was a step to the eternity and that it was not just a junction of bodies, mixed in a momentary desire. No. It was a union of souls and love, love in the purest and at the same time dirtier sense of the word.<p>

The self-controlled and calm and centered Aaron Hotchner would not lose himself now, as if it was his last breathing, as he never used to, no: he would finally find himself, finding his peace, finding his path in the curves of that woman, feeling her entire body as if touching clouds, as if his mouth was tasting all the flavors from that soft and delicious body of hers, as if drinking water from the purest source, so thirsty that that water would spread throughout his face. He would show all the love that he had saved for her since… well, since always. No one could never properly 'read' Aaron Hotchner, even Emily, but now he would show everything to her, his most deep desire and feeling, and she would be able to feel.

Emily was holding him with her fingers on his backs. She was a brave, determined, independent, intelligent woman and everything, but now, she felt like she was again that little girl that she was in a distant past, who once had dared to dream with the perfect man for her, the prince charming of the fairy tales, the man that could make her feel that she didn't have to be all the her mother had taught her, because being a little child, the last thing that you want to listen is that you might spend your whole life being self-sufficient and that you do not need a man to be happy. Yeah: Truth. We don't have to have a man to be happy, but now, she was feeling: it is soooo fucking good be feeling so loved and desired. And he was not only any man, he was the fantasy that had dwelt her dreams for years, along with and all the thoughts that she had about that man, her boss, and she finally felt complete.

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><p>On the next morning, they woke at 6am by the sound of the alarm. For one millisecond, she thought that she had had another dream with that man, but no, he was there, snuggling her in his arms. She made a slight movement as if approaching him even more as if it was possible, as if she didn't want him to go from her arms, from her body, from her soul. Hotch then tightened the hug even more, showing her that he also didn't want to leave her warm body that had fitted perfect with his.<p>

They were still under the duvet, trying to ignore the annoying sound of the alarm.

But, after a few minutes, the centered and controlled side of him spoke louder and he decided that it was time to get up from the bed. He planted a kiss on Emily's forehead, and said:

"…Morning..."

She smiled at him, stretching a little in the bed. She wanted to say that she had loved spending the night in his arms, and thank God that it had not been a dream, but she said only:

"Morning…"

Seeing that he was already up to get dressed, she said:

"I'll make you a coffee…"

"That is not necessary… I need to go to my place before going to the BAU..."

"Okay…" She said.

She got up from the bed and dressed her robe to follow him to the door.

Before leaving, he was like combing her hair with both of his hands as she gently held his head and said:

"The night was amazing… you made me the happiest man in the world… but we still have things to talk about it… and how things will be from now on… but not now…"

She said:

"Okay…"

When he was about to leave and her insecure side was about to scream, he just pulled her into a long and passionate kiss. He broke the kiss and said:

"See you at the office…"

Emily then went to the kitchen to prepare a coffee for herself. She had many questions to think about now like how things would be from now on, if he would open to the team about them, and when it would be, if one of them would have to leave the BAU, and everything. Of course that she wouldn't tell anyone from the team what had happened on that night. Thinking about the team, she remembered Morgan and his feelings. She thought:

'Oh, God…It will hurt him so bad...'

While she was waiting for the coffee machine to get her coffee ready, she was putting food for Sergio as the cat was already there to eat.

She then leaned against the sink, with her arms crossed, wondering with the cat:

"Serg… why life is so complicated? I mean… It's been a while since I've been trying to do the right things, but it's so hard ..."

Sergio stopped eating to look at Emily, as if: '…are you going to let me eat in peace, or not?' Emily kept venting with the cat:

"I was hoping that this night with Hotch… I mean… I love him… I loved our night together…It was like a dream coming truth and I can barely believe that it actually happened… But…"

Sergio was thinking: '…you are going to make me lose my appetite and you know that for me this is a very huge deal… because I am very hungry right now…'

"I don't know, Serg… …Right now… I don't have a good feeling… why do I have this bitter feeling…I'm so insecure…. As if something was wrong… I was not supposed to be feeling that way…"

The cat didn't stop to eat only because he was really starving, but he was thinking:

'…you are making me into a crazy cat that they must have a cat asylum mental institution… I am sure there isn't any but you might be the first person to drive a cat crazy and that is me…'

Emily still said to him, while she was drinking her coffee now:

"Yeah… buddy… hmm… life is not easy… I think your life must be pretty better, huh, Serg… only sleeping and eating, that's it..."

The cat was thinking: '…You think my life is easy? No one would want to live with a crazy woman like you… but seriously I love you anyways…'

As if she could read his thought, she bent down and caressed him on the head, saying:

"Well… I'm going to get ready to work now… I hope I don't have to leave you during long days…"

Sergio thanked heaven she was gone. He wanted to eat in peace.

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><p>Arriving at the BAU in her nice gray suit, and a lump in her throat for an unknown reason, she noticed that Hotch was already there, in his office and Reid was preparing a coffee for himself, she couldn't see Morgan, or JJ, or Rossi, or Garcia. She went straight to her desk and started to deal with papers, etc.<p>

Walking by her, with his coffee in hands, Reid said:

"Morning, Emily…"

Without even looking at him, she said:

"Morning…"

She always, during the whole six years that they were working together, she always used to look at him to say Good Morning to him, but not today, and of course that Reid had noticed that. He then sat on his chair, from where he could see her and asked:

"You okay?"

Mentally she wondered if there was something written on her forehead, she then looked at him and said:

"Yeah…"

At this exact moment, Morgan entered the place. He put his go-bag on his desk and he went to get a coffee for himself. He had a smile on his face, like he always did. He said:

"Morning, pretty boy... Morning, Princess…"

Emily remained involved with the paper work that she was dealing, and Reid remained looking at her, while she said a distant '…Morning…' also for Morgan.

Morgan and Emily were also trying to disguise that they had been a little more than friends lately, so they were just doing their work at their desks. Of course that he had no idea about the big step that she and Hotch had given the night before. Reid was only observing everything in silence.

About 10 AM, Emily's cell phone rang, it was Clyde.

'Hell. I forgot to return his call...' She thought.

She didn't answer the call again. She didn't want to talk to him while she was there, at the BAU. He insisted a little more but she never answered. She then sent a message to him: _'I can't talk now. I call you as soon as I can…'_

Of course that this didn't go unnoticed by Morgan, and especially by Reid.

Around noon, Emily's phone vibrated again, it was message this time. Almost losing her temper because she thought it was Clyde again, she grabbed her cell phone, to read:

_'…I still have your taste in my mouth… but I already miss you…'_

It was from Hotch. She opened her mouth wide while it was forming a smile. She could feel her face getting warm as she was blushing. She was not expecting that from him at all, there at BAU.

Reid was savoring a lollipop as he was observing her all the time this morning. Of course that he noticed that too. He said, then, to Morgan:

"Hey, Morgan, it looks like someone had a very agitated night…"

Morgan was writing something when he heard Reid saying that, so he instantly looked at Reid and he saw that Reid was smirking, looking at Prentiss.

She, then, put the cell phone away and looked at Reid, frowning, closing her smile and she said:

"…and it looks like that someone has nothing to do this morning… ...would you please help me here, Reid… I have lots of stuff to do…"

"…yeah… it must be… statistics say that when someone is too distracted and cannot focus on their own works, it is because they have on their minds in something too bad or too good or in a mix of the two… and also that their work can accumulate for days because of it… and … my work is on schedule, just saying…"

Emily really loved Reid, but she wanted to kill him right now. She again didn't even dare to look at Morgan, who was looking at her, 'reading' all her behavior for sure, she thought. She only said:

"I asked for help, not statistics…"

She then got up and went to get a coffee for her.

A few minutes later, Morgan took that Rossi had called Reid to help him with something in his office and he went to the small kitchen to talk to Emily.

Once there, even before that he could open his mouth, she said:

"…Don't give me the 'is everything okay…' please…"

Morgan stopped as he had his mouth already opened to ask that. But now he only said:

"Wow…"

She had not looked at him yet, but now she did. She said:

"I'm sorry… I… I… I'm sorry…"

"Did something happen?" He asked.

She opened her mouth to say something, but she could only be staring at him, stirring her mouth as if she would say something, but nothing came out. She could not tell him that she had spet the night fucking her brains out with Hotch, but she also did not want to lie to him.

They looked at each other eyes for a while as if reading something. Realizing that Emily was totally lost and uncomfortable, Morgan said:

"That's okay, Emily…"

He walked by her to get a coffee for himself and she could breath again, because she was holding it, and went to her desk.

The rest of the morning was like that: awkward.

Almost by the time of lunch, Rossi invited them to have lunch together somewhere around.

JJ would have lunch with her family at home. Emily, Morgan, Garcia and Reid were there deciding if they would go or not, Hotch was already leaving his office and they could see that he was sending a message. Seconds later, Emily's cell phone beeped with a message. She read: '…I have to go home for Jack… see you later…'

But even before that Hotch could leave, someone appeared there, smiling at them: it was Clyde.

Emily was sitting on her chair. She was the only one that had not seen that he was there. The whole team was looking at Clyde, so she turned to see what the team was looking at.

She first opened her mouth, then, she swallowed. She quickly got up and walked to talk to him:

"What are you doing here?" She was kind of pissed.

"Oh… Emily… it is such a bad mannered way to welcome me ..."

Clyde gave a few steps to greet everyone on the team, reaching to them.

Hotch was a little farther from the team, but he was observing everything, especially because Emily's discomfort was almost touchable.

Around a year ago, when Clyde had helped to profile Ian Doyle, Hotch had suspected that Emily did have some kind of romantic relationship with him in the past as this was only a suspicion so he was not sure of anything.

The team only greeted him politely but it was clear that they didn't like him.

He brought back bad memories from Emily's past. And most importantly, they knew it had been only Clyde that was the only one responsible for throwing Emily to Ian Doyle in the first place.

After greeting everyone, he said to Emily:

"…You don't return my calls… so I had to come here ..."

"We were leaving for lunch..." Emily said.

Before, Clyde could say something, Morgan said:

"Emily, we're leaving…will you come?"

Hotch also stood there waiting for her answer. She said:

"I think I'll solve this first" ... She said pointing to Clyde.

Pretending that he had forgotten something in his office, Hotch went there as the rest of the team went out for lunch.

Seeing that Hotch was not in his office and the rest of the team was not there to watch her, Emily said to Clyde:

"Just give me a minute… I need to hand this file to my boss…"

"Okay, darling..." Clyde said smiling at her.

She opened the door of his office and got inside, closing the door again. He looked at her and approached her for a loving hug, as if smelling her hair. She felt safe in his arms. She was feeling totally lost till now, but now she felt safe. Still hugging him, she said:

"Clyde has been calling me for a few days… I have no idea what he wants…"

He gently held her by the face, saying:

"It is okay, Emily… Just let me know if you need something..."

"Okay… I will…"

They wanted so badly to kiss each other, they could see it through their eyes, but they knew they couldn't, not there.

When she was opening the door to leave, he said:

"Emily, if you want, you can take the rest of the day off… If we have new cases, JJ will call you…"

Emily then looked at him and he was smiling at her, a little smile, and she just could not resist to that charming smile. She approached him, supporting both of her hands on his desk, in a way that he could look at her boobs in her very discrete neckline, and she whispered as their mouths were really close:

"…Replying to your message… depending on me… you won't get my taste out from your mouth ever again…"

She smirked devilishly at him, and she left the office, feeling a little more confident of herself, leaving the man there. He wanted to throw away all the papers that were on his table to catch her right there. But he knew that he could never do that.

Emily left the BAU with Clyde. She didn't want to talk to him there. In the BAU's parking lot, she said:

"Where we're going?"

"Somewhere quiet enough, I was thinking about my Hotel ..."

"Clyde, we don't need to go to a Hotel bedroom to talk ..."

"Oh… Emily… who said bedroom? You must be missing me, darling…"

He knew how to piss her off. They got into the Emily's car. She said:

"Clyde, please stop, if you have something serious to say, then just say it… I do not want any jokes…"

"It's not a joke…"

She sent an angry look at him.

Okay… okay…I'll stop…"

They went to a restaurant, nearby. They asked for something to eat. Then, Emily asked:

"…So what do you have to say?"

"…I've been promoted…"

"Oh, good for you ...and ...What does this have to do with me?"

"We are looking for someone to run our London office…"

"I don't follow…"

"C'mon, Emily…Of course you follow... This is exactly what you're thinking..."

She thought for a while and said:

"Work for INTERPOL again? No way ..."

"Look, Em… it's not only 'work' it's 'run'... There is a big difference ... It's a great and huge opportunity…"

He noticed that she was thinking about it. She was really surprised.

A thousand things were going through her mind now, but the main one was Aaron, and she knew that one of them would have to leave the BAU because of their relationship, but it was so recent as well. Clyde said:

"You can think about it… but we need an answer soon…"

Seeing her lips touching the small cup of coffee that she was drinking after lunch, he could not resist and say:

"Time is your ally ... You look even sexier…"

She almost spat her coffee. He didn't resist and touched her hands, which was on the table. But she immediately pulled it off. He said:

"Come on, you used to like it ..."

He was referring to Interpol.

"You said it correctly, 'used' to! That was a long time ago ..." She said.

They had issues pending to solve, so he said:

"Em, I know I was a jerk to you in the past… but I thought that it was only about sex from your part too ..."

She took a deep breath. She knew that one day they would have to have this conversation. She wanted to say to him that it was all about sex from her part too, but she knew that it wasn't. And now that she was starting a relationship with the love of her life, she knew that she had to definitely put a proper ending to things with Clyde, and not only avoid talking about it, because he had really hurt her in the past. All these issues were occupying too much space in her mental boxes. She needed to get rid of it, at least of a few of them. So, for his pleasant surprise, she said:

"Let's talk about this somewhere else..."

And she took him straight to her place.

Once there, she made another coffee, considering that the conversation would be difficult.

The cat growled to Clyde and stood right there. Serge didn't like to intrude himself in Emily's life, but strangely he wanted now to be part of this talk. He cuddled on the couch and stayed there, with both eyes on Clyde, as if to protect Emily.

"I don't know how I managed to live so far away from you during all these years ..." He said.

She was surprised hearing this, because he was not the kind of person to open up his feelings, not even a little. She said:

"You missed your chance…"

"Maybe… we can re-start from the point that we stopped…"

She laughed, nervously, a very bitter smile. But she could not deny that they did have a past together, a big past. She sarcastically said:

"If I remember correctly… the point that we stopped was you telling me to fuck Ian Doyle…"

And that sentence hurt him. Not in the past, but a lot now, as if he could only realize now how much he had hurt her. And she had been saving this to him. He said:

"You were really waiting to throw it on my face, huh ... yeah, go ahead…I deserve it..."

She gave a few steps, only thinking, as if it had a way that she could continue with her life without touching these hurtful wounds. But there was no way, she had to get rid of all of this, she had to try. Then, she said:

"Clyde… when I called you… saying that it was getting hard to get away from Ian… because he wanted to have sex with me… I was desperate… I had already handed to you a lot of information about him, information that would be enough to arrest him for a long time already… but you wanted more, and you didn't even think about me for a second...and about my feelings…and threw me in his arms… Do you remember that phone call? …On that day, I could see, I realized that I was no more than one object in your hands... that you could use…"

Emily had really saved all this hurt inside her. She had to work it out in anyway. She wanted to get rid of the mental box inside her head that was saving all this pain and deliver it exactly to whom it belonged to: Clyde

Clyde was getting nervous. He was never good in dealing with emotions or feelings. He didn't even know how to handle with it. At that moment, he got up from the couch and started to walk around the room, as if thinking. All the smiles had given place to huge worry lines. He was really nervous, he said:

"Why didn't you say anything? Why didn't tell me that you were in love with me? Why didn't say that you wanted protection? Why didn't tell me that you didn't want to do that job?"

She looked at him as if she could not believe that he was asking that. She said:

"Oh… Please ... do you really think that I'm the kind of woman who opens legs just for sex?"

"As far as I remember you used to open your legs very easy for me…"

Emily's mouth opened as hell now. Hearing this, she, instantly, slapped him on the face, and the woman was strong. But he was strong too, so he took only a while to recover. Then, he said:

"I'm sorry, Em… I'm sorry ... I do really apologize for the past… but I just do not know how to come back and fix all of that... And change my actions from the past…and say that I would do differently… but we still have the future…"

She approached him to say very slowly to his face:

"We don't have A.N.Y.T.H.I.N.G… unfortunately I cannot erase the past… but my future, I can choose, and I don't see any place for you there…"

All her issues now related to this were on him now, all the weight was on his backs now. Then of course, he wanted to end this conversation. He said:

"Okay… I was only wondering if you want to do this job…"

"I think we have nothing else to talk about Clyde...you can go now, please ... I'll call you when I have an answer…"

She waited until evening to see if Hotch would call her. But he did not. So she decided to make him a surprise at his place.

Once there, she rang the bell and waited. The door finally opened, and Emily stared at the person there in front of her: Beth.

Emily felt her heart breaking.

"Hi, Emily, Aaron is putting Jack to sleep…Come inside…"

Compartmentalize, compartmentalize, compartmentalize, compartmentalize, compartmentalize, compartmentalize, she was mentally reminding for herself.

"Oh… No... Thanks… I… I… I'll talk to him later… I was just in the neighborhood ... but I'll talk to him later..."

"Okay..." Beth said smiling.

Emily walked away and only turned to say:

"Beth, I'm really sorry for your mother ..."

"Aw, Thanks, Emily… Are you sure that you do not want to come in?"

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading…<strong>


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

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><p><strong>I own nothing<strong>

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><p>Emily had decided to make a visit surprise to Hotch, but, once there, it was her that got the surprise: nothing more, nothing less than a smiling Beth that answered the door.<p>

Emily felt her heart breaking.

"Hi, Emily, Aaron is putting Jack to sleep…Come inside…"

Compartmentalize, compartmentalize, compartmentalize, compartmentalize, compartmentalize, compartmentalize, she was mentally reminding for herself.

"Oh… No... Thanks… I… I… I'll talk to him later… I was just in the neighborhood ... but I'll talk to him later..."

"Okay..." Beth said smiling.

Emily walked away and only turned to say:

"Beth, I'm really sorry for your mother ..."

"Aw, Thanks, Emily… Are you sure that you do not want to come in?"

"Ah… Yeah… It is already too late…"

"Okay…"

Emily wanted to disappear from there.

Once in her car, driving back to her place, she was saying to herself:

"Fuck, Emily! Once there the tears! But you are not going to cry! You are not going cry because of man! I wish your mother was here to see it! She would screw you! I'm not going to cry for him… I'm not going to cry!"

But, in fact, she was already crying, all the way while driving.

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><p>Meanwhile, at Hotch's place, Beth waited for him to come back to the living room. She was sitting on the couch.<p>

After a few minutes, he came to talk to her. It was obvious that he was totally unhappy and discomforted with her presence there. She was sitting on the couch but Hotch did not even sit. He was standing as a polite invitation for her to 'fuck off'.

She was not a profiler, far from that, but his discomfort was so obvious that she noticed and said:

"…Aaron… I'm sorry once again for having come here ... but you know that when I'd go back home after work, she was always there waiting for me… and now I don't have her anymore… and today I was so sad that I did not want to go home… that's why I came here… but I know that is wrong…"

He kept his distant and cold way, and said:

"Look… Beth… I'm so sorry again… but there is nothing that I can do about it ..."

"…But you can hear me ..."

He wanted to tell her: 'I'm completely in love with another woman and I can not receive you here at home anymore…' But he couldn't tell her ... She was already too devastated because of her mother. He also had no idea that Emily had been there a few minutes ago. And of course that Beth would not tell him. He said:

"I can hear you… but my life is very complicated, my work, my schedule, but you will always be able to call me if you need..."

She was just crying and she said nothing. She had the most 'poor girl' face now.

Seeing that she was not saying anything or mentioning to go home, he said:

"Can I call you a cab?"

Of course that she was not expecting this so soon, but it was too damn obvious that he wanted her to leave, so she said:

"Sure…"

Immediately when he closed the door and Beth was gone, he called Emily. She was not even home yet. Her cell phone was on the passenger seat, and still driving she took a look who was calling on screen. She did not answer. She was hurt and pissed. Yeah: she was a very bad temper. He insisted but she never answered.

Emily finally got home, throwing herself on the couch for a while. She looked at Sergio who was lying on the couch, asleep. She wanted someone to talk but he was asleep. She thought about Morgan, of course, but she couldn't run for him anymore, not only after what had happened between her and Hotch.

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><p>The next day, she was the first one to arrive at BAU, except for Hotch that was already there, of course.<p>

Immediately when he saw that Emily was there, he called her to his office:

"Emily, my office, please…"

She didn't want to go, she was still pissed, but, there, at the BAU, he was the boss and the issue that he wanted to talk to her could be about work, so there was not way that she could refuse to go.

She entered his office and he locked the door and closed the curtains. He looked at her and said:

"…You have not answered my calls ..."

She had no excuse for it, so she stayed quiet, as she didn't want to play the 'jealous pre-girlfriend', but it was exactly what she was feeling. He insisted:

"Emily, I'm talking to you ..."

Finally, she said:

"I don't know what you want me to say…"

"How about starting by telling me why you are not answering my calls ..."

"I was upset ..."

"…With me?"

Emily was getting nervous, she thought: he thinks I'm an idiot.

"Emily, please, I don't have the time or age to play games... Tell me what's going on ..."

At that moment she looked at him, in the eyes, almost spitting the words, pointing the finger at his face:

"…**YOU** tell me what you were doing with your little girlfriend inside your house last night…"

This caught him totally by surprise because he had no idea that she knew about it, but he was Aaron Hotchner, he was always prepared for anything. He knew what to do with a woman in a middle of an acute crisis of jealousy in front of him. Then he said calmly:

"She's not my girlfriend… and I thought that I had been clear enough about that…"

"I went to make you a surprise! …And I got the surprise myself…a bitter one!"

From the high of his intelligence and balance, he said to her:

"Emily… Look at me…"

She was in front of him, with her arms crossed, she was reluctant to look at him, but she did. And he said to her, looking straight into her eyes:

"I love you… and you need to decide if you are going to believe and trust me or not… because otherwise… it will not work…"

Of course, an Emily Prentiss was not satisfied with that answer. But she knew it was an issue for later. He added:

"We have new cases… let's focus on work for now… but on the way back we can continue this talk and I can explain… and I also want to know about Clyde and what he wanted with you...if you want to say…"

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><p>JJ presented the case for the team and they would travel to a town in Texas. It was a case that bodies were being found on a river. For this case, specifically, Garcia traveled with the team.<p>

Hotch and Emily were totally focused at work now.

It had been three days that they were working on that case, but the UNSUB had stopped killing, so the tracks were getting scarce.

At the police station, Reid and Garcia were checking computer data, Morgan was getting a coffee for himself on the coffee machine, Hotch had gone somewhere with the delegate, and Emily, JJ and Rossi had gone to talk to the families of the victims.

The team was gathered at the police station again and it was already almost midnight and there were no new clues, no bodies, so Hotch sent to the team Hotel to rest. Everyone was there for days already without a proper sleep.

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><p>Once in the Hotel, Garcia was sharing a room with JJ, so Emily was alone on her bedroom, she was trying to sleep, but she was so tired and exhausted that it seems that she could not even sleep. She was wondering that even in her best dreams he would never show up in her bedroom. When she was thinking that, she heard someone knocking of the door. She was wearing only a T-shirt and panties. But as she was sure that it was Hotch on door, she didn't bother to change. She ran to open the door. And she opened the door to se: ...Morgan. She tried her best to hide the disappointment.<p>

"Hey…"

"I see that things are happening ..."

"I'm sorry?" She asked, pretending that she did not know what he was talking about.

"…It was obvious that you were expecting someone else Emily..." He said, while he was entering.

The first thing that he noticed was that she was wearing almost nothing. 'Oh, My God, these legs… as if I could desire her more…' He thought.

He was staring at her body, she said:

"Morgan, stop look at me, you've seen me in panties and bra before, then there is nothing new for you here…"

"It's been a long time we do not talk…" He said.

"I know…"

She sat on the bed, legs crossed and Morgan was on an armchair.

"So… how are things with Hotch?"

"Morgan…. please ..."

She did not want to hurt him.

"Come on, Emily, we're friends, you can open up yourself to me…"

"Why do you hurt yourself like this?"

"Oh… So you two are really..."

He cut off the sentence and looked down, while she was biting her lips. It broke his heart. But he could still say:

"I'm glad for you Emily…"

She just did not know what to say to him. For her luck, at that exact time, someone was knocking on the door. She immediately mentally prayed for it would not be Hotch.

Even that she had no idea about the "almost fuck" between them, he was Aaron Hotchner, no one never knew till gar he knew about things.

Morgan noticed that she was kind of panic, and said:

"We are studying the case, right?"

"…Right!"

She opened the door and it was Garcia. Emily said:

"Hi, Pen, come on in…" Emily said.

"Emily, I think I should apologize to you ..."

She stopped talking when she saw that Morgan was there.

She said:

"Oh…"

"Hi, baby girl… We are reviewing the case…"

"Okay, and I'm Britney Spears…"

Emily looked at Morgan and Morgan looked at Emily, both took a deep breath, as if 'Let's talk like adults'.

"Ok, I think I should go then… I have nothing to do with your life ..." Garcia said.

Emily didn't let her leave:

"Pen, look, there's nothing between us… just friendship…"

Emily was searching for words in her mind as she also did not want to hurt Morgan.

"I love Morgan the same way that I love you ..." Emily added.

"But he loves you differently…"Garcia said.

"Look, Pen, I can handle with it, okay? I'm a big boy…remember? Now, let's let Emily sleep… I'll take you to your room ..."

"Yeah… okay… can I give you a hug first?" She asked to Emily.

And the two women hugged each other.

* * *

><p>She was almost sleeping when her cell phone beeped with a message:<p>

_'I wish I could be there with you…'_

It was Hotch, her smile opened from ear to ear, and she finally got to sleep.

* * *

><p>On the next day, they managed to close the case and arrest the UNSUB<p>

* * *

><p>Back at BAU, it was a Friday, 10 pm, as Jack was with Jessica, Hotch took the opportunity to spend one more night out. He texted Emily:<p>

_'I am going to your place tonight, ok?'_

_'Okay'_ She replied.

Once at her home, she got dressed from him in the sexiest black bra and panties, that she had, and a cetin robe, also in black. She wanted him. She didn't want to know about Beth or anything. She just wanted him. She was in her bedroom finalizing getting ready, she was talking to Serge:

"Serge, Hotch is coming here tonight….be nice to him… okay…"

"Ok, since he does not keep talking in my head ..." The cat thought.

"He'll be your daddy, buddy…. I finally got you a daddy…"

"…As if I needed one! No! Thank you!" The cat thought.

"And… Guess what? He has a son! A child to play with you, buddy! Is not it awesome?"

Emily was feeling happy, and the cat, well, not so much:

"…A child? Who said that I want a child to play with me?" The cat thought.

"…His name is Jack ... He is adorable… I know you'll love him..."

"Oh this crazy woman… it is already too much for me to handle… now she comes with different guys here and now a child ..." The cat thought.

"…Soon, you will meet him, okay ... I promise ..."

"Oh no, please don't ..." The cat thought.

The cat was getting desperate. He jumped up and disappeared in the house.

"Serge, I'm talking to you… don't fade away while I'm speaking to you…"

Serge still had time to think before he vanishes:

"I'm starting to feel sorry for these two people..."

After a little while, Hotch was there at the door.

She looked in the peephole only to confirm it was him. And then she took off her robe. She was wearing only her sexy underwear now, a very small and sexy panties and a bra. She opened the door for him to enter and stayed there behind the door, and he entered walking quickly to the living room. Typical! He was thinking that he was there to talk and that Emily was still pissed and everything. Emily closed the door.

When he finally turned to look at her, he jumped, he did not have a habit the of opening his mouth, but this time his mouth opened wide, this, without mentioning the other parts of his body that was quickly responding to that marvelous vision. He stood there for a while, with his mouth opened, and it was a big invitation to Emily.

She grabbed him practically climbing his body, with both legs around his waist as he held her by the ass. And they fell into a passionate kiss: words for what?

They made love for the most part of the night. There, on the couch, then in bed.

After a long time, they were hugged under de duvets, recovering theirs breath from the last orgasm, Hotch started passing the fingers lightly on the clover scar, gift from Ian Doyle. He had already seen it, of course, but at the first time that he saw, he didn't want comment on anything to not embarrass her. He wanted to make it clear that it made no difference to him. But today he wanted to ask:

"…Does it hurt?"

"Just inside…" She said almost whispering.

He knew she was referring to the humiliation of being branded as if she was a property. But he didn't want to bring this subject. So, he said:

"Emily, we have to talk..."

"I know..."

"You want to start telling me what Easter wanted with you the other day..."

Emily sat on the bed facing Hotch, who also sat leaning against the bed headboard. They had to look at each other eyes to have that conversation. She took a deep breath before answering.

"He is looking for someone to run the London office..."

"Oh…wow… that's such a big deal"...

"Yeah..."

"…Are you considering it?"

"I don't know... I haven't even thinking about it yet."

"Emily, are you really thinking about considering it?"

"Aaron…What other choice do we have?"

"What do you mean?"

"I don't want to be hiding forever… I don't think we have age or time to spend…"

"…And do you think that the solution to that is to move to another continent?"

"What are the other options, Aaron?"

He thought for a moment and replied:

"Emily, there are certain moments in life that we have to make choices, prioritize things..."

"I don't follow…"

"…Choosing between the priorities of life…"

"I can not imagine you without BAU, and BAU does not function without you... So I'm the one that it will have to leave..."

"Leave to live in another country, another continent?"

"Well, I haven't given him an answer yet ..."

He was only thinking now. Then she said:

"If I'll go… would you support me?"

"I would you support you in everything, Emily, always… but if I want you to go, of course not…working with Easter… after everything that he put you through and your past with him…"

"What do you mean?"

"…You and Easter, you may not want to tell me… and I respect that, but I know you two were more than colleagues…"

There was no way for her to deny it now, and she also did not want to lie to him, but it was a delicate situation for her. She said:

"Yes… we were much more than only colleagues… I will not deny it… I will not lie to you… but I can't say that I loved him… he was just the right guy at the right time… but had never been in love with him… I liked being with him, I liked his company…I could even fall in love with him as I was almost there… but he killed that possibility giving me on a tray for Doyle with no consideration, without even thinking about my feelings… after the whole think with Doyle… I could not even look at him anymore…"

Hotch didn't want her to go, but he also didn't want to interfere in her decision.  
>He really wanted to ask her to stay and marry him, and help him raising Jack and maybe have a child with her. But he kept his wishes for him.<p>

Emily wanted so much that he asked her to stay, she wanted to help raise Jack. She was even totally ready to be a mother. Since Declan's time, she was ready to be a mother, but in Ian's conditions, no way, she couldn't. Just like Hotch, she also kept her wishes for herself.

And that way neither of them said what they really wanted from now on; and it was exactly the same thing what both of them wanted. If they were just honest to each other. It was the consequence of the choice of being a closed book. Both of them were like that. He said:

"When are you giving him an answer?"

"Soon…"

"Aaron… during my whole life…. the only person that I really loved… the only man to whom I really gave myself and loved me back, was Ian Doyle, sadly...I know… So I only focused at work, and almost all my life passed…I don't know how to deal with happiness in love… And I don't know if I can live without working... "

"…You don't have to live without working… I'm pretty sure that you can get any good work right here in DC…"

She thought for a while. Hotch then took both her hands in his and said, looking into her eyes:

"But I want you to know that I really love you… and I'll be right here for any decision you make, supporting you and loving you…"

He kissed her on the mouth, and without breaking the kiss, she said, "I love you too…"

* * *

><p>On the next morning Emily woke up, she made coffee for them, she gave the food to the cat, and she was imagining how it would be good to have a family, and take care of them and everything, and if possible including being a mother. Her period was already failing. It was normal for her to be with several months without her period, and the doctor had said that it was normal to fail because of her age, etc. But she would love to help raise Jack as her own son, and she also had Sergio too. She was happy with that.<p>

They were in the kitchen having breakfast and talking. She said:

"Aaron, what was Beth doing at your place the other night?"

"She was around, and she misses her mother...she just wanted someone to talk to..."

"Oh…" Emily said.

"But… I talked to her… and I think she will not look for me anymore... Emily, I want you to be sure about my love for you…"

After some time, he said:

"I really wanted to spend the entire weekend with you… but I need to go home… I need to be with Jack…. to go out with him… to help him with school stuff... in short: being a father…"

"Hmm, okay…I think I can understand that". She said jokingly.

She would have the entire weekend to think about Clyde's proposal.

* * *

><p>On Sunday night, Emily was on the couch, watching old stuff on TV, Sergio was there with her, very close to her. She said:<p>

"Serg, do you want to come here on my lap?"

The cat looked at her.

"Come on, Serg, come here ..."

She reached out her arms to him.

The cat miraculously went and snuggled on her lap. She was sitting cross-legged. The cat was on her lap, and Emily was caressing him on the head.

The cat was thinking: 'okay, I'm here, but you keep your mouth shut…'

"Serg, what am I gonna do?" She asked him.

'Oh no…' ... The cat thought.

"Serg… please… buddy…"

'…You ask me to sit on your lap to drive me total insane right? …or are you going to give me your usual emotional outburst with a lot of screaming and crying so loud that you will make me deaf since I am so close to you right now…'

"I don't want to stay away from Hotch… but…. it is a great opportunity for me… and I know I'll have to leave BAU somehow… I don't know what to do Serg… all that I know is that I love him and I want to be with him…..Serg...why when something so good happens...something bad has to happen as well? It is not fair… I don't want to be away from all my friends here… they are family to me ... I do not want to go to Clyde…. what am I gonna do?"

She started to drop a few tears on Sergio's head. The cat was not even a little patient. He was not sentimental either, but at this time he felt that he needed to help her, so he reached to lick the tears out of her face, as if he wanted to remove the tears.

Emily felt comforted by the cat. She said:

"Oh, thank you buddy, I promise that if I go to London, you're going with me…"

'Oh, my God… What?' The cat wondered.

* * *

><p>On that same Sunday night, Morgan was training at home, lifting weights, when the doorbell rang. He peered through the peephole and opened the door quickly:<p>

"Hi baby girl ... come on in ..."

And she entered by her usual walking style which was hurriedly, straight to the living room. He closed the door and went after her.

"Is everything okay, Penelope?"

She looked at him and dropped a bomb on Derek by saying:

"Derek… I am so tired of hiding my feelings for you as I have a pretty good idea how you see me a sister, or a family member but what I feel for you is way beyond that… Yes, I love you like a family member but it is not a sibling love… it is more like a family husband love... They say that friends make the best type of romantic relationship... We have been the best of friends for many years but we build this into something more if we try and that is why I am telling you this now even though this might come as a shock and surprise to you…"

Derek was now in total shock as his jaw fell on the ground.

* * *

><p>It had been two months since Emily and Aaron were together in a hidden mode still. Emily had not accepted the job at Interpol as she and Hotch had decided that they would work it out somehow, and they wanted to be together, near to each other as possible.<p>

* * *

><p>The team was working now on a case in San Francisco. Couples were being kidnapped and tortured to death. They were in the same town for about three days now. The whole team was very focused and concentrated on the case as always.<p>

It was about two AM in the morning. Emily and Morgan were at the police station waiting for the rest of the team that was in the field. They were in a small office, drinking some strong coffee to keep them awake, reviewing the case, and talking. They were really tired and exhausted. Emily said:

"I cannot even think or focus anymore…"

"I know… me neither…"

*Moments of silence*

Emily then asked:

"Derek, did something happen between you and Penelope? I noticed that you and her are… kind of… not joking around anymore as before…"

"Yeah…" He merely said.

Then, he added:

"I think you were right… she has feelings for me that I never considered before…"

"It was clear more than water…" Emily said.

Derek was really worried about it, quiet and thoughtful. Emily said:

"What are you gonna do?"

"I cannot do anything, Emily!"

"Why do not you at least try…. Give her a chance?"

"Are you kidding me, Emily?"

*Moments of silence*

Emily asked:

"What did you tell her?"

"It was not a good talk…"

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Emily asked.

"I need to talk to someone...otherwise I'll explode..."

"You know that you can always count on me, right?"

"I know Emily… Thank you ... But I don't wanna talk now, not here…"

"Just let me know when you want…"

"Okay... I will…"

*Moments of silence*

Morgan said:

"You know Emily… I think now I know how you feel about me ..."

"What do you mean?"

"When someone says that they are in love with you, but you don't feel the same way about the person ..."

"You should give her a chance, Derek, Penelope is the sweetest person on the planet… she loves you… she has a pure heart… I'm sure you'll easily fall in love with her ..."

Morgan let go a bitter smile and said:

"It is funny how it is so easy for you tell me to give her a chance… when you never even considered in giving me a chance...…giving us a chance…"

When Morgan was saying this last sentence (giving us a chance), a foot had stepped into the place, behind the door, and no need to say that he was not a type of a man that used to listening things behind the doors, but what Morgan was saying was too damn interesting so to speak for him to not keep listening to the conversation. Neither Morgan nor Emily had no idea that he was there. He could not help himself, and he continued to listen to what Emily was saying:

"Derek… please… let's not go back to this point ..."

Morgan now looked at her and said, and he had a kind of despair in his voice:

"Emily… you know how difficult it is for me to understand… I'm trying… but inside I'm suffering because I saw how much you wanted me… every time we kissed… I could feel the reactions on your body… I still can feel it… I can still feel your taste… I saw how jealous you got on that day at the Hotel… and I'm freaking out! What has changed two months ago to now?"

"Derek… I don't want to hurt you… but I already told you... It was just about sex... physical attraction…"

Hearing this, the man, Hotch just wanted to vanish from there as he didn't want to hear anything more. How come? Emily and Morgan? He could not believe it! But he was too focused on the case to think about it now.

* * *

><p>After the case was solved, they were in the plane getting back to Quantico, everyone was really tired. Hotch was in the chair in the back part of the plane and Emily went to talk to him as they had no time to talk during the case, etc.<p>

"Hi… is everything okay?"

"Yeah… You?"

"Yeah… well…tired ..."

"Same here…" He said without looking at her as he was reading some files.

"I was thinking about the weekend… we could take Jack to the zoo, and then ..."

He looked at her, a cold look, and said:

"No, Emily, thank you, but don't think it's time to involve Jack in our relationship…"

Emily was surprised by his answer, she frowned, and said only:

"Okay… I… I'm sorry…"

Hotch was pissed off, but he would never discuss with her there.

* * *

><p>The next day, it was a Friday, in the morning, before going to the BAU, Emily went to the doctor, for her periodic review for BAU. As the team had just came from days working in a row, they stayed in the office the whole day doing paper work.<p>

By the end of the day, she was at the BAU, at her desk, working with files, etc. her cell phone rang. She answered:

"Prentiss"

"Agent Prentiss?"

"Yeah… Can I help you?"

"Good afternoon, Agent Prentiss, I'm Susie, Doctor Sempton's secretary, he'd like to talk to you... I'll transfer the call…"

"Okay, thank you…"

"Hey, Emily, how are you?"

"The same way I left your office this morning ..." Emily joked. Then she added:

"Something wrong with my tests results?"

"Well, Emily, your health is more than perfect… it is only that… well…you can repeat the exams if you want to, but I am absolutely sure that the results will be the same… both blood and urine tests were positive for pregnancy… Congratulations, you're pregnant…"

Emily froze for a while, she frowned and it looked like that she was not herself anymore. She opened her mouth to talk but nothing came out.

"Emily? Emily?"

She could not talk.

"Emily? Are you there?"

"I... I... I'm here, Doctor Sempton…Erm… Thank you for calling me..."

It was the last stock of words that she had, the last things that she managed to say before hanging up the phone, because her voice was totally gone now. She had to coordinate the ideas now.

Of course that she was happy. But it was a complete surprise as she never was expecting for that anymore, she didn't even think that she could still have a baby. She had to tell Hotch, it was the first thing that she thought about.

As it was still about five PM, and she knew that Hotch would stay there at the BAU until at least eight, she took her purse and went straight to the doctor office to get the results.

Then, she bought a beautiful small white box, with a white lace on it, she rolled up the results, and placed inside the box, with a baby slipper, knitting, white.

She went back to the BAU, it was about seven-thirty, it was a Friday. Hotch was the only one that was still there, he was in his office. She knocked on the door.

"Come on in…"

Emily entered his office with the small box in her hands and a big smile on her face, and her heart seemed that had gain a new life now, so happy she was. Hotch only looked at her. She said, smiling at him:

"I have a gift for you!"

She said that and put the box on his desk right in front of him.

Still holding the pen, he looked at her, then, he looked at the box. He was still confused and angry because of the talk that he had heard between her and Morgan; so angry that he could not even confront her about it yet, and he was still hoping that Emily would tell him something about it.

He wasn't sure about what had happened, but he knew something had happened between them. But he was expecting that she would tell him. He felt betrayed. He didn't smile back at her seeing the small white box, he just stopped writing. He took the box in his hands and opened it. He took the papers that were inside that were that tests results and read them.

She stood there looking at him all the time, with a big smile on her face, only waiting to read the reactions on his face, but the reactions never came and she closed her smile like a flower wilting. By the time he finished reading the paper, she was really worried and she was not smiling anymore. He only looked at her and asked:

"Are you sure it's mine?"

* * *

><p><strong>Guys… thanks for reading and I'm sorry for the errors etc… I didn't have time to correct this chapter the way I wanted to. And please… leave your comments, opinions etc… thank you again…<strong>


	11. Chapter 11

**I own nothing**

* * *

><p>Emily was so happy inside Hotch's office, waiting for him to react about the news that they would have a baby. After reading the tests results, he only looked at her, totally ignoring the baby's booties, and said:<p>

"Are you sure it's mine?"

He wanted to make her feel that he knew about her and someone else called Morgan, after all, he was human! He had blood running through his veins, but, he had chosen the very worst way. He could not choose worst then this to confront her about Morgan. And he would now have to pay the consequences.

It entered like an arrow in Emily's heart, stealing all the air. She almost fell down her legs. She stayed totally paralyzed for a while. She frowned and opened her mouth, she was hurt, hurt in the soul.

She quickly grabbed the box and the tests and the baby's booties and walked away from there, so quickly that Hotch did not have time even to react. After she left he punched the table, cursing himself, but he would have to calm down a little to be able to go after her.

* * *

><p>She drove as fast as she could because she needed to do something before she could change her mind, while the tears were falling down her face, deliberately.<p>

Once she was at her place, she made a phone call:

"Clyde, it's me… do you still have the job?"

* * *

><p>Hotch had realized the huge, enormous mistake that he just had made. He broke a pencil with anger, and threw it away. He went after Emily to her place and he drove as fast as he could. He arrived there less than ten minutes after her. He banged desperately on the door, until she opened it.<p>

Emily was in the toilet, she had cried a lot, tears of rage, and she was trying to wash her face as if she could wash the tears and the pain she was feeling in her soul and heart now. She was hearing that someone was knocking desperately at her door, but she didn't bother to go check it out.

She was looking at her image reflected in the mirror. Her eyes was red and swollen. She looked deep into her own eyes and said to herself, wiping the tears: 'these were the last tears you shed because of a man! Remember your mother saying: Prentiss women do not cry, never! She left the toilet to open the door as she could notice that he would not give up, and it was better to face him soon, and end up with everything. She opened the door for him to enter. She only opened the door but she did not even look at him. He entered and said:

"Emily, I'm sorry ..."

She cut him off, facing him, and yelling at him as she was still very pissed off:

"I'm sorry? …You just ruined what would be probably the happiest moment of my life! …And like a chutzpah you come here with a simple 'I'm sorry?'... I don't wanna hear your excuses…. and taking the advantage that you are no longer my boss… GO FUCK YOURSELF… and get out of my house!"

Hotch didn't know what to do, the woman was out of control. He said:

"Emily… I'm sorry ... I don't know what to say ... I had heard the other day that..."

She cut him off again to yell at his face:

"I don't wanna hear anything... there's NO excuses for what you did… it's all clear to me now… let's pretend that nothing happened between us… just forget that I exist… I'm leaving BAU, I'm moving to London..."

"WHAT?" he was getting desperate now and his face was red in nervousness.

"…I've already decided… I just talked with Clyde and took the offer… this is what I want..."

"Emily… this is insane… this is my child too… you cannot move to another continent…"

"YOUR CHILD?" She laughed sarcastically. And added:

"This is NOT your child… this is MY child… only mine… this baby does not need you!"

Then Hotch went around the world to go over all his pride, to demean himself, to recognize his errors, which for him was not easy: an extreme controlled man. He was begging to her:

"Emily ... please ... calm down… let's talk... I can explain…"

With too much effort, an effort from another planet that even she did not know where it came from but she managed to control her emotions a little. Then, she took a deep breath and, emphasizing each syllable that she was saying, she uttered:

"No…..it's over Hotch… there is no chance for me to forget what you just did… I spent six years of my life by your side… loving you in silence… choking the love inside me… dreaming with you… hoping that….maybe….one day…the super, hyper, mega, ultra controlled and cold Aaron Hotchner would even notice me as a woman… and….. just like a miracle… that day came… and….. as a miracle even greater…. God blessed us with a child… when I didn't even expect being a mother anymore…. when I had already given up to not being a mother because I thought I didn't deserved this as a kind of punishment for my mistakes from the past… and you do what?... I was in heaven when I entered in your office…. Aaron… and you… you threw me, mercilessly, s-t-r-a-i-g-h-t t-o h-e-l-l…. You don't even let me enjoy the happiness to be carrying a baby…. because I saved this moment, this happiness to share and enjoy with you…I have no idea what your excuses are to think that I fall in the bed with other men… but just for you to know… I have not been with any man since I put my feet at BAU… since I laid my eyes on you..."

She made a pause and added, without looking at him:

"Now, go away…"

And she opened the door wide for him to leave. She was really hurt, deeply hurt that had stirred with her feelings. He still tried:

"Emily…."

She looked at him with her eyes that were even more black and said:

"Go away…."

And he had no choice but to go, hoping that they could work it out later or on another day, when she was calmer. He knew that she was right. But the in the line of emotional issues called "Men Will Never Understand Women", he was number one, the very first. It seemed that she was speaking in Greek.

He was driving and mentally praying that he could just wake up at anytime and all of this had been a nightmare, except for the child. But he that knew he would not wake up. It was real. But he heard her saying: 'it was just about sex...' To Morgan! He was not crazy. He knew that the child was his because he knew that Emily would never lie about this.

* * *

><p>She spent the whole weekend ignoring his calls and messages and she did everything that she needed to make her move to London. She went to the BAU on Saturday to get some belongings that were there. She left her badge and gun in her drawer, and she left a letter on Hotch's table for him.<p>

She sold her car for half of the price. She covered all the furniture with white sheets, she gave all the content of her fridge and pantry to her neighbor, she locked the apartment and left, leaving a copy of the key with Briana that would take care of the rest for her. She went to the airport by cab, carrying her bags, Sergio, and a lot of pain. She could not delay any longer as she had to go without thinking.

* * *

><p>Already in the airport as she was very emotional, she cried when she saw Sergio being placed in a little cage specific for animals' transportation in airplanes. She told him:<p>

"It will be just for a few hours, okay, buddy. Hold on ..."

'I always want to be left alone but not in a prison with strange people around… I take back all the bad things about you… saying I want to be alone and away from you… I need you with me now please do not leave me here…' The cat thought.

She got on the plane to London on Sunday, around six PM.

It was around eight PM when she arrived in London, because of the scales and etc. Clyde was already there waiting for her. He was leaning against a pillar, arms crossed, watching her from afar: she was pushing her cart with bags and a box with Sergio, and she hardly could be seen behind the cart. He only watched her for while then he decided to go to help her:

"You're lucky I'm in town ..." He said, approaching her.

"Hello to you too Clyde…"

Needless to say that she was in a bad mood. She had left DC without thinking, but she had around twelve hours to think, and it was impossible for her not to think about Morgan, Reid, JJ, Penelope, Rossi, they were a family to her. The only family that she had known, she had cried thinking how much she would miss them and how it was unfair to leave without saying a proper goodbye to all of them, again and this time by her own choice.

She thought a lot during the trip, and she was now a little afraid for having to take care of her own baby by herself alone, being so far away from its father, in a strange country, doing a dangerous job. But there was no looking back. After all, that had been a bit of his choice too.

"Did you book the hotel that I asked for?" She asked.

"No..." He said, while he was pushing the cart with her bags.

"No?" She asked, staring at him.

"You are staying at my place..." He said in a calm way, without looking at her.

"No way!" She practically yelled.

His share of patience was also very limited today, but he still knew how to tame her. He was good at it. He said:

"How many times have you passed in the stubbornness line before you were born, huh, Em?"

"I'm not staying at your place!" She screamed, and who saw from afar, could swear that they were a couple having an issue.

Emily was talking a lot non stop right now and Clyde was not processing even a single word that she was saying. He had already lived with her in past and he knew her very well. While she was still talking non stop, they approached the car, he opened the trunk of car, and put all her stuff inside, while she was holding only her purse and Sergio on her arms, as the cat was thinking: 'Oh my god ... What is happening in my life? Why I cannot be a normal cat 24 hours a day? Where is this crazy woman taking me?' Clyde, then, closed the trunk and said to her:

"Em, I'm never home… I only spend a few days and the rest of the year in the field around the world… There, you'll have the entire structure that you need in the beginning… a house with everything that you'll need… do you remember Mary, Tom, Frank? They are still with me… (They were Clyde's employees, housekeeper, driver, etc, as he lived in a mansion)…You stay there today and then you think about it and decide and you can get your own apartment if you want to… please..."

"Ok… but I will not live there…" She didn't stop talking, she wanted to talk, she was out of control, she still needed to vent, and somehow, Clyde had always been a private 'Punching Bag' for her, as she really never had forgave him.

"Okay, you'll stay until you find a place to live ..."

Clyde lived in a small mansion, very elegant and with rustic touches, with lots of trees around. The house had large windows in an upscale neighborhood of London. It was not the same house that Emily used to live with him in the past, but the employees were the same. As it was night, the employees were not there anymore.

Once at his place, they talked a little while and she said then:

"Clyde… just take me to my bedroom… I really need to rest… the trip was very tiring and stuff… I only need your wi-fi password… and also… tomorrow I have an important thing to tell you… but only tomorrow as I really need to rest…"

Clyde took her to a big guest bedroom suite. Both of them were tired so he just left her there, but before he could leave the room, she said:

"Clyde..."

He looked at her.

"Thank you..." She said.

He smiled a little at her and left.

Sergio was totally scared, he was thinking:

'This crazy woman, first, she stuck me in that box for hours and now brings me to this place that I don't even know where it is, with this weird guy, I WANT MY HOUSE, my couch…'

The cat growled, staring at her. She said, as if she was reading his thoughts:

"Serg, we'll be alright… I promise ... have I told you that will have a little brother or sister now ..."

She placed her hand on her belly, and her eyes were watering. She hadn't stopped to think about the pregnancy yet.

'Oh no. What? What? This crazy lady is going to have a baby? …a duplicate of her…it is bad enough I have to deal with her, now someone like her, this will be double trouble for me…' The cat was thinking, and he looked for a place in the bedroom where he could hide and sleep in peace.

Emily then logged onto her notebook as she had to say goodbye to her friends. At least leave an explanation and a proper good-bye. She knew that the first thing they did when they arrived at BAU was checking emails. She wrote:

My idol and dearest friend, David Rossi,

There are no words to describe how important you are in my life, how much I trust you, how much I'm going to miss you. Know that it was a great honor for me to have worked with you, my idol! You're the best. Humanity won a lot when you decided to return to the BAU. I would venture to say that you are the right hand man of God here on Earth. Don't forget, I'll be just some hours away, just a few minutes by phone, and neither second by thought. You live in my heart. I love you, Emily.

My sister in heart, JJ,

I love you so much, you're my porcelain doll… you are the sweetest person in the world. I learned a lot from you... I'm gonna miss you so much... I want to hear from you, Will and Henry. You taught me that I still had a heart… you taught me that I still can have a family and I never forget what you told me that you could see me as a mother… I'll never forget this... This is stuck in my heart… I think it was a kind of prophecy… I love you very much and certainly we'll keep in touch always.

Love, Emily.

My happiness in life, Pen,

There are so many things that I want to say to you… there are so many things left to be said… Know that I never wanted to hurt you on purpose, unfortunately, life surprises us… sometimes we are simply thrown into situations without knowing how to act… You are the purest heart I've ever met… I hope you can continue like this… Don't let the pitfalls of life interfere in your feelings… Morgan loves you, on his owns ways. And he deserves your love... I know that. He is sad that you have changed with him… And you know that we cannot choose who we fall in love with, so don't blame him… I am absolutely sure that if he could, he would choose you. I love you so very much. I'm gonna miss you, I'm gonna miss your smile that cheered me up even in the darkest days.

Love, Emily.

My boy genius,

This time I'm leaving because there are no more choices for me there. But this time I'm leaving my address, phone number, email and everything else that you can use to contact me whenever you want or need. My little boy, I love you so much. I have never been able to show you how much I love you, but I do! I thank heaven for the time I could live with you. I will keep praying that your headaches stop forever. Take care of yourself.

I love you. Emily.

Now it was him, Morgan, that person that even she could never figure out which were her feelings for him. She was just thinking about him and the words did not come. She just wanted to hug him. She wanted to hug him right now. She needed his strong and warm arms around her, saying that everything would be okay. And what before had felt so right (moving to London) became suddenly so wrong. She felt ungrounded. She was just wondering now how things would be if this baby was his.

One day before she was kidnapped by Doyle, Morgan had said those sweet words to her, among these words, he had said that 'no matter how awful, he'd promise that she would never be alone' ... and somehow, those words had touched her heart, and she decided to believe him. Since then, she trusted him with her life, and she knew that she would always have someone in this world who she could count on, and that someone called Derek Morgan. The only question was: how much far she had put herself from him? Morgan was her ground, but she was the one that had stepped out of his life, and now she was alone.

Among tears, she started to write:

My love, Derek,

I just wanted to say that this is not a goodbye...You're right here inside my heart forever. He was a wrong choice, and now I have to face the consequences by myself… and far away as I have to figure out a lot of things in my life now, but I know that our story is not over yet... I also know that it's unfair to ask you wait for me ... I never felt so loved by someone like I felt by you… I hope you can forgive me one day. And know that I LOVE YOU.

Emily.

* * *

><p>On the next morning, she went downstairs into the living room and she could hear that Clyde was talking on the phone in an office next to the room. He was saying that he could not travel today, maybe tomorrow, and everything.<p>

After a little while, he came to talk to her:

"Good morning, darling!"

"Morning ..."

"You sleep well?

She had not slept at all, but she replied:

"Yeah ..."

"I was waiting for you for breakfast."

She wasn't hungry, but she knew that she needed to eat because of the baby.

Then Clyde took her to the balcony, where it had a breakfast table mounted especially for her with flowers and everything. That was the advantage of having lots of employees available. She managed to eat a little. He said during the breakfast:

"Emily ... this morning, I'll take you to the Interpol office..."

She cut him off to say:

"Clyde, I have something important to say ... before everything…"

"Okay, go ahead..."

"I'm pregnant…"

Clyde felt a sting in his heart, he could not identify what this feeling was, but he also didn't want to identify it because that would mean problems, feelings and etc and he just could not handle it. He stopped chewing what he was eating and looked at her.

"Oh, Emily ... you should have told me ..."

"I'm telling now….This will be a problem?"

"Not for me ... I mean… the work is internal… as a chief, etc, but it doesn't mean you will not take risks…"

"Well, I was thinking of getting acquainted with the work until the baby is born..."

"Yeah! This sounds great… at least I'll have someone competent and reliable to coordinate the internal work while I'm on the field… Since you had not accepted the work already started by various people over but no one responded with what we needed... I really appreciated you for accepting..."

"Thank you…. And… Clyde…. before we go to the INTERPOL office, I need to see a doctor, to know everything about the baby, I need exams, know the time of pregnancy, I don't know anything yet….. I….I… kind…. of ran away from… DC…"

"Emily, we have an excellent medical staff right there at Interpol…"

"Okay…"

"Is it just me or you accepting the job has to do with the escape from the father of this child?"

She sighed, and said:

"I don't wanna talk about it, Clyde, sorry…"

"Okay…"

"Somehow I knew that one day I'd have to take care of you ..." He said sarcastically.

"You? Take care of me? When did you take care of me, Clyde?"

"Oh... don't be so unfair darling ... many times…"

"Last time, while my team was looking for me, and chasing Doyle, as far as I know, you were running away with a bag full of money…" She said with a large portion of venom in her voice.

"Well, I did help your team ... Aaron Hotcher convinced me….It did hurt me to see pain in his eyes...he almost was humbled asking for my help...to save you…" He grinned proudly.

Well, from there, she wanted to change the subject.

* * *

><p><strong>Quantico – BAU:<strong>

Hotch, as always, was the first to arrive at BAU. He went to his office, put the folder on the table and saw Emily's letter. He opened the letter. It was nothing more than her resignation. And he thought that he had already had his quota of suffering for a lifetime.

He was then paralyzed, with the paper in hand, when the wise David Rossi went into his office also holding a paper in his hand. It was time to clarify things between friends. It was the email from Emily in Rossi's hands. He shut the door behind him and asked:

"What does that mean?" He showed the email.

"What makes you think I know something?" Hotch asked.

"Come on, Aaron, please...to me, just tell me, we're friends ... It's me, Rossi ..."

Hotch thought for a while and said:

"She's pregnant ..."

He didn't even know why he said this, it had nothing to do with the moment, but it was the thing that was most pounding in his head, so he just spat. Rossi was a little surprised but not much.

"Okay… Congratulations to you both ... but this email left the impression that she has moved to Mars… What happened?"

"We argued, she didn't want to listen, I didn't know she wouldn't ever come here again... I just found out now…"

And he showed Emily's resignation to Rossi.

"And you'll stand there? Is that it? Will you do nothing about it? What was the discussion about?"

"I had my reasons, Dave..."

"And your reasons are sufficient to give up the woman you love carrying your child?"

The two men were there, arguing, and Rossi didn't know what to say to the man that had complete lack of experience with women. Hotch definitely had no experience with women. Haley had been his only one and Beth did not even count. He didn't know how to act or what to do with a very tough temper of an Emily Prentiss. He told to Rossi:

"When Haley, that was my wife, left me, taking Jack, I accepted, I didn't go after her..."

"Well, maybe because you didn't love her anymore ..." Rossi said firmly.

At that exact moment, a very strong and pissed person just broke into the place, with a crumpled paper in his hands. He had fire in his eyes. He practically threw the paper on Hotch, yelling:

"What did you do to her?"

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks for reading and pliss comment…<strong>


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

* * *

><p><strong>I OWN NOTHING<strong>

* * *

><p>BAU - Monday morning<p>

"What did you do to her?"

Morgan had asked, breaking into Hotch's office, with blood in his eyes. Right now, Rossi really wished that he were a little younger and stronger to be able to get the two men apart, just in case they resorted to blows. Hotch quickly got up from his chair, as if he was actually ready for a fight, and said to Morgan, facing him, also with blood in his eyes:

"I don't have to explain my personal life to you! Get out of my office..."

But Morgan was not giving up, he was really angry by the fact that Emily was gone, and by her email, he could see that Hotch was the only one responsible for her decision. So, he then approach even more closer to Hotch's face and yelled:

"Since it involves Emily, I do! What the fuck you did to her?"

For a millisecond that was missing for them to have a big fight right there, JJ broke into the office in a hurry with some files in hands and said:

"Guys, sorry, thirty children were abducted from a nursery…notes are being sent saying they will kill one child a day… three have already been killed ..."

David Rossi never, never thought that one day in his life he would thank for having a new case. This discussion between the two men would have to wait.

* * *

><p><strong>London:<strong>

Emily had been presented to everybody at her new job, Interpol, and she had made her admission examinations. She was completely clean and able for work.

She was now in the waiting room of an obstetrician doctor to do tests related to the baby. She was trying to concentrate on the 'magazine decorating baby room' that she had in hands, but it was impossible since every woman that entered the place was with the husband or boyfriend or something. Only she was alone. She remained on the same page of the magazine for all the time that she was there, till she heard someone calling her name. It was the receptionist:

"Miss Prentiss?"

"Hey…" Emily got up and approached the counter.

"It's your turn now… here is all your tests… the doctor is waiting for you…"

"Ah, oh, okay… thank you…"

With the results of the tests in hands she made her path to the doctor's office. Once there, he reached for her, saying:

"Hi, I'm Dr. William Benton… you can call me William, please…"

"Hi, Emily… Prentiss…"

"Please, have a seat…"

The doctor spent a few minutes reading the results from some tests that the nurses had already done on Emily, and he said:

"Is this your first pregnancy, Emily?"

"Yes…I mean… I had an abortion in a very distant past…"

"Oh, I see… well… I can see here that your health is more than perfect…"

Emily only smiled at him as he was still reading the files with her data. He said:

"I need to know all the details because as you know you being pregnant at this very mature age… there are more risks for your baby… the baby is prone for more diseases and disabilities… I do not want to scare you… I just want you to know the facts because there is still good chance everything will be pretty normal, especially considering your excellent health… and plus all the modern technology and options are available to make sure your child will live a happy and normal life…"

"Oh, thank you…I… I was not even expecting this anymore…" She had a sorrow in her voice that made the doctor now stop reading to look at her. He asked:

"So, this was not a planned child?"

Emily didn't know what to say, she was wondering if she actually had to open up her life to the doctor, a stranger. As if he was reading her mind, he said:

"You know, Miss Prentiss…"

"Emily, please…"

"You know, Emily… our clinic has a different approach… we don't take care of only the physical part of your baby… we see the baby as a whole thing… so, we do our best to make sure it will come to the world very well not only physically, but also mentally and emotionally… from the moment the baby is conceived, it is already a person… a human being… so, that's why I need to ask some kind of questions…to try to help and lead you to the best way of take care of it…"

"Well… answering your question… not in the beginning… like I said… I never thought that I could still be a mother… so, no, it was not planned… but I'm very happy now that God gave me one more chance to do the right thing… and yes… my baby is already deeply loved by me…"

"…And… What about the father?"

"I would rather not talk about him but the info you might need is that the father is in good physical shape, no health issues as his job demands that he keeps is in good physical shape at all times…"

"That's good… that's excellent… where is he now? I ask because it is a practice here in our clinic that the fathers are always together during all the process so the baby can really feel loved and desired and start since the very beginning to build a strong emotional bond as a family…"

"The father is in America… we don't live together… our relationship was a mistake and I can raise my baby on my own...I really appreciate all your concerns but let's just do the ultrasound and check if everything is okay, please, as I really need to go back to work…"

By the tests, she got the news that she had exactly six weeks of pregnancy.

* * *

><p>At night, Clyde and Emily were arriving home. She had agreed to stay at his house until the baby is born. She didn't want to be alone during this period. She could need help. Besides, Clyde was never there.<p>

"Good evening, Miss Emily, we could not talk before but I want to say that it's really great to see you again after so many years…"

"Come on, Mary, you can call me just Emily ... and I'm really happy to see you again as well…"

Clyde always imposes a certain distance to the employees, but Emily was a sweet thing to all of them.

Clyde went to his bedroom, to pack up his things that he would need to the work trip that he would do the next day, and Emily went to her bedroom, to take a bath as she was really exhausted, more mentally than physically.

After the shower, she was still in her bathrobe, and she was using a towel to dry her hair and everything, when she came out of the bedroom and yelled from the mezzanine:

"Mary, please, have you seen Sergio? He is not in the bedroom ..."

"Yes, I did… but... it's been a while since I saw him…."

Coming quickly down the stairs, she was getting nervous, she was saying:

"Oh no! Please, Mary, help me find him, please, I can not lose him… he does not know the house… he is going to get lost...Oh my God…"

Emily got into an utter despair and, suddenly, everyone on the house were looking for Sergio: the gardener, driver, Mary and Emily were desperately looking for the cat and Clyde was talking on the phone right there near the living room, as he noticed that Emily was crying in despair, she could not stop crying. Clyde was paralyzed seeing that. He said to the other person on the phone:

"Hold on a second…"

Then, he asked to Emily:

"Hey, Em, what's going on?"

"SERGIO IS GONE" ... She yelled in despair.

Clyde froze in place. He couldn't believe that she was acting like, that as she was crying her brain out, just because of a cat. He went into his office and closed the door, without saying anything that he knew that she could even kill him now, and closed the door.

Emily's hormones were screaming and she cried rivers.

"Emily… you have to think about the baby… please… just stay here… they are looking for Sergio…"

Mary said while she was holding Emily by the arm as if trying to make her sit on the couch. But Emily didn't. She said:

"Mary… please, Sergio means everything to me… he is the only one I have… please… he does not know this place…. Oh my God… how could I have let this happen? ...this is all my fault…"

After about one hour the cat showed up in the living room. She said:

"Oh, baby, where were you? Do not do this to mommy ever again, please, Sergio… I can not live without you ... I love you so much…where have you been?"

The cat had gone for a walk by the huge garden, but he decided to return to the house when he found Clyde's hungry dogs in the kennel.

Emily kept talking to the cat for a while and caressing him on her lap, and declaring all her love for the cat, etc, and even the employees were thinking that a little weird, while the cat was wondering:

"I am not in a jail here… even though this stupid new place feels like one…. I miss my old home…. I am free to go where I want and I was just gone for a second…. Can you blame me for wanting to leave you for a minute… you always so crazy like you are acting now…. Geez… give me a break…."

* * *

><p>After dinner, when she was in her bedroom to sleep, and Sergio was there in the bed curled to sleep, she decided that it was time to talk to her baby for the first time. She was caressing her belly and she started to say:<p>

"Hi… I'm Emily… I'm your mother… (She let out a nervous smile)… that word… "mother" still sounds a little weird to me… and being a mom sounds even more weird… but I promise that I'll try to do my best possible and impossible...to be a good mother to you… I know that God has sent you to me… and it is a big responsibility… but one thing I can promise to you….you'll be the most desired and loved baby in the entire world… and I know you'll also be smart, polite and healthy child in the whole world… I'm sorry that we have not spoken before… but so many things had happened, that I just couldn't, and it has to do with your father…. But, baby, I think it will be just you and me… but we will do well… okay, I promise... Know that I love you very, very much already…"

Well, now she was crying rivers again. It seemed that the promise she had made about not crying anymore had been forgotten in DC. She was even thinking about calling her mother and asking her to teach her again, how to not to cry. She had learned it in the past but she had completely forgotten. She needed a crash course with Elizabeth Prentiss again. Suddenly, she heard someone knocking on the door. She wiped the tears and said:

"Come on in…"

It was Clyde. Showing only his head inside the bedroom, he said:

"Will you give me some minutes?"

But he realized that she had been crying. Then he entered the bedroom and said:

"Oh, Em, are you crying?"

In a rare moment of tenderness, Clyde sat beside her on the bed and hugged her. After a little, he looked her in the eyes and said:

"Emily, are you sure you want this job?"

She thought for a while and said:

"I am... I have to... This whole thing will pass… I will correspond to all your expectations…"

"I have no doubt about it, Em… Right now, I'm just worried about you and your well being..."

"I'll be okay… I think it is only because it is all too recent…"

"Okay… but … if anything changes… just let me know… I'll always be here for you… and whenever you need to talk…"

"Thank you…"

* * *

><p><strong>United States:<strong>

It was the third day that they were working on that case. Hotch was at the police station right now, with the team, delivering the profile to the all the people around.

Out of a sudden, a man entered the police station and asked to speak to him. The man was desperate and crying a lot. He was saying:

"You have to save my child!"

Hotch then approached the man and said, trying to stay calm:

"We are doing everything that is possible, Sir..."

"Please...I just know my son only from photos...I wasn't there during the pregnancy… I wasn't there when he was born… and now he is almost two and I only know him by photos… there is nothing I can do about my past but I'd like to believe that I can do everything for him in the future… I'd like to have this chance…"

'Oops, this hood fit me perfectly!' Hotch thought, immediately. Then, he said:

"Sir, we just published the profile… and I believe that we are close to get him, but I cannot promise anything…"

* * *

><p>Two more days the team managed to stop the bandit and arrest him. In the plane back to Quantico, the mood among them was strange. Everyone knew that something was happening, and that it had to do with Emily's departure. Working on the case, they were quite capable of going through any personal feud, the work was of enormous responsibility, it was an oath for a life, they knew the importance of this. That case has served to decentralize the team from their own problems and try to see things from others perspectives.<p>

* * *

><p>Arriving at the BAU, around five o'clock pm, none of them was talking to anyone. They were all sad because of Emily and because of the last case, in which five small children had died. That fact made their own problems become much, much smaller.<p>

Morgan was walking down the hall towards Garcia's office when he heard from Hotch:

"My office…"

This could not wait till other day. It had to be solved now. Rossi only observed the men entering Hotch's office, and he thought:

'I think they will not kill each other, but just in case, I'm staying here...'

* * *

><p><strong>London<strong>

Thursday night, Emily was home after work, Clyde was travelling. She had seen that Penelope, JJ and Rossi had emailed her back, but she had not read them yet. She did not want to cry, not now that she was starting to feel better and everything.

Reid and Morgan have not responded back to her email. She knew Reid didn't like computer and Morgan, well, she had an idea how he would be angry, pissed and sad.

She was now there in the bedroom only thinking. Sergio was sleeping. He looked like a small ball on the little mattress that Emily had bought for him.

She decided to make a phone call:

"Mother? ..."

"Hi Emily, just a second… I'll hang up the other call…"

"Okay..."

Emily listened when her mother was saying goodbye to someone that she was talking to on another call.

"Okay, Em, I can talk now..."

"Mother…if you're busy… I can call you another moment..."

"No… Emily, we can talk now. How have you been?"

"I'm…Fine… and you? Dad?"

"We're also fine…"

*Moments of silence*

Then, Emily said:

"Mother…I… I have some news…I'd like to talk in person but I am too far from DC right now ...at the moment..."

"Hmm… Far?… …Some case?"

"No… I…Hmm… Actually, I... I...moved from DC…"

"What do you mean, you moved?"

"I moved to London…"

Emily had inherited many things from her mother including the 'open mouth' habit. Elizabeth Prentiss opened her mouth a little now. Then, she said:

"Well, that is a significant change, Emily..."

"Yeah, it sure is…"

"And why is that? …Any particular reason?"

"I actually got a very good job offer in London, at Interpol ..."

"What? Interpol? Are you working for Interpol again? Are you crazy, Emily? After all that they made you going through?"

'Oh no, critics are the last thing that I need now'. Emily thought. Then, she said:

"Mom… I'm calling you just to let you know… and not to ask for opinions… I've made my decision already... And I'm not working in the field anymore… I'm running the Interpol London office…"

"Well, it's still hard for me to congratulate you for that…"

"It has always been hard for you to congratulate me for anything, hasn't it mother?"

*Moments of silence*

"Anyways… I'm not done yet… there's one more thing that I want to tell you, you and Dad ..."

As much as Emily fought against it, she always needed her mother approval.

"I'm all ears, Emily, I'm listening…"

"I'm pregnant ..."

Elizabeth opened her mouth wide now, and Emily could almost see her mother expression as she knew her mother very well. As Ambassador said nothing, Emily ratified, adding:

"You'll be a grandma… congratulations, mother…"

It took a while for the woman to respond, so Emily started to call her:

"Mother?"

"I…I'm here ... Oh… Emily ...Oh… congratulations!"

"…And am I supposed to ask who the father is… or if you two are getting married or not?"

"No, mother… for now... ...the only thing that I have to say is that some more Prentiss is on the way now…"

"Oh… Emily… this is a big shock for me… but… congratulations again and everything that you need… you can count on me…"

"Thanks, Mother…"

"Emily, give me your address by email so I can go and visit…"

Emily hung up the phone and started to caress her belly, saying:

"Hi, baby, I just talk to your Grandma… well… she is a little tough… but I know how to deal with her… and deep down, she care about us… and I'll always be here to protect you, okay, baby, always!... Maybe next week… during the exams I get to find out if you're little girl or a little boy…. do you wanna tell me it now baby?"

Sergio was curled on himself, only looking at her talking to someone that he could not figure out, but he knew that it was not to him, and he had listened she talking about a baby and etc, he was only wondering who she was talking to. Emily looked at him and said:

"Ohhhhh Serg…. do not be jealous, sweetie… I love you ..."

He closed his eyes as if he was sleeping, and thought: 'You can keep talking to the baby or something...'

The cat was beginning to like the idea to have little brother or sister. At least she would have someone else to talk to and she would leave him in peace.

Emily was feeling a little more confident and calm so she decided to read the emails from her friends.

* * *

><p>Well, the phone call had been easier than Emily was thinking. But she knew her mother was still in shock with the news. Of course that Elizabeth Prentiss never imagined that her only child being a single mother, even at age 40. She wanted her daughter to get married like she had always dreamed for Emily with a big party, with all the pomp and gala, with the all high society of the world. But at this point, it was clear that would not happen. And she had already accepted, and a baby is always very welcome.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>BAU<strong>

Morgan and Hotch entered into Hotch's office. Hotch sat down and said a cold 'have to seat' to Morgan.

Hotch said:

"Morgan… our personal lives should remain outside of the work environment… We should not bring personal problems here for the BAU… where we already have plenty to worry about..."

"I apologize for the way I walked into your office that day. You're the boss and I know there is a hierarchy that should be respected, and I promise that it won't happen again ..." Morgan said.

"No, it won't!" Hotch ratified.

"I needed to know what happened that made her took that drastic decision to move to another country…" Morgan said.

"It was her decision… it's her personal life..." Hotch said.

"So… you just let her go? Doing nothing? I mean, professionally, she is one of best agents BAU has..."

"I cannot interfere in her choices…I just want to make sure that you'll continue 100% focused on the job…"

"You shouldn't even ask me this Hotch… but I'll answer anyways: work… unlike for you… do not come first for me, but come together with other sectors of my life; because I am human and my relationships make me a better person... so I feel more and more desire to make the world a better place to live in… You should think about it..."

Without looking at Morgan, he said:

"You can go now…"

* * *

><p>As soon as Morgan left, Hotch stood there only thinking about Emily and everything. He knew that it had to be that way, she had made her choice and he did have his reasons for doing what he did. He had an important post at the BAU, he had an oath to honor. His dedication to work had to be more important than all others parts of his life. The team was his responsibility, because behind the team, he had an entire humanity to save, at least, to try. It had been his choice for life. He already gave up a family once for it. He knew the price, and he paid for it. And it was his choice to continue that dedication to saving humanity. He was really in love with Emily, and he was living a hell in the Earth knowing that she was carrying his baby, and he knew that he would have to deal with it, but since the beginning, somehow, he knew that things would not be anywhere near easy. Emily was not a kind of a woman that he was used to, since Haley was only a lovely housewife.<p>

Morgan came out Hotch's office and he went straight to Garcia's to talk to her. He opened the door. She was standing, turning off the computers to go home. He said:

"Alright, Penelope, you'll not leave this room until we talk and settle things between us ..."

"Morgan, please ..."

"Please ... nothing! I can not stand it anymore ... one day you go to my place… and say a lot of beautiful things and the other day we don't talk anymore..."

"And you made me wanting to run… and you said that you would never give me a chance..."

"Of course, Penelope…. I would never do that to you! You are very precious to me… but I can not just use you... I see you as a little sister… and I cannot do anything about it… Pen, you know that these things are not choices…"

"I know Derek… I'm sorry for going to your place and ruin things between us like that… I know about your feelings for Emily and I respect that… and I think that what I did had more to do with the fact that she rejected you than about my feelings for you…"

"I can handle it, Penelope…but I cannot just be without your smiles and jokes around me all the time again… please…"

And they hugged each other.

* * *

><p><strong>London<strong>

A few days later:

Emily was sitting on her bed, reading the emails from the team:

Hi, Emily…

'What a sad surprise you prepared for us! We are all devastated. How come? What happened this time? I hope that someday you can come back! Where are you anyways? I really hope that whatever are your reasons, you're happy, and know that you can count on me. I love you, too, Emily!

JJ

Emily…again?

You, getting out of our lives? Again? Damn it! I can not believe it! Please, come back, we can fix everything that happened. I just can not be without you. I'm going to miss you so much. But wherever you are, and whatever you're doing, you can count on me always, you'll never be alone because I'm here for you. Love you!

Penelope

Dear, Emily,

What can I say? Life takes us to paths unknown for reasons that we're not even sure about. I hope that in the midst of it all, there will be a right time where the reins are taken, because life is half chances but half choices. I'll always be here for you.

PS: Congratulations!

Dave

Rossi was the only one from the team that knew about the pregnancy as Hotch had told him.

Reid hated computers so he didn't answer the email, he would call her as soon as he knew about where she was, and when he knew what her new phone numbers were. Hotch had not told the team where she was and where she was working.

* * *

><p><strong>One month later<strong>

Emily was at the obstetrician clinic to do the exams and try to find out if the baby was a boy or a girl.

"Miss Emily, we are going to do the ultrasound but first I need to ask you a few questions, okay?"

"Sure…"

Emily had been emotionally better, but today was the day that she would find out the sex of the baby, it was impossible for her to not miss Hotch not being there with her, since he was the father. It would be a magic and glorious moment for them. He was supposed to be there with her. But he wasn't, and she would have to face it alone, like she always did in her whole life, like Morgan had said to her in the past that 'every time that she tried to count on someone, they let her down, so she always go it alone', she took a deep breath and looked at the doctor in front of her:

"Are you feeling anything different? …Nauseas? …Vomiting? …Problems to sleep? …Tiredness?"

"Well… As I used to drink too much coffee in the past, my stomach was always complaining… ...Feeling too sleepy and tiredness is normal for me...… due to my work… and now… the only new thing is the morning sickness which I think that is pretty normal…"

"Yes, and unfortunately… there is nothing that we can do about it…"

"Are you feeling some kind of pain?"

Emily wanted to laugh now, a lot! It was all the she was feeling since Hotch had spat that fateful question, making her turning into a pain herself. But she knew that the doctor was referring only to physical pain, so she said:

"So far, no… and I hope that it continues like that…"

"Well, in the future, at the last months of pregnancy, you'll probably feel a discomfort since the baby can compress the other internal organs and also a back pain, because of the weight… but those are pretty normal stuff…"

Emily said nothing.

"Are you eating a proper amount of fruits and vegetables per day?"

"Well, I'm trying to eat correctly…"

"I am going to prescribe a diet for you to follow... From now on… you have to think not only about you… but about that person who is growing inside you…"

Automatically, Emily opened her eyes wide for the doctor as if, wow, the penny has dropped just now. Noticing that Emily had just freaked out, de doctor said:

"Yeah, Emily, you have a person growing inside of you… And, from now on, until the next 18 years, you are responsible for making the right choices for this little person...along with the father if that is the case…"

Emily swallowed, she could not even respond to that. 'Was that real? Was it really happening? Are there really someone inside me?' She thought.

The doctor now got up from his chair and said to her:

"Now, I need you to go in there and change your clothes and dress this medical examination apron and lie there on that stretcher… I come back in a few minutes…"

A few minutes later, during the exam, the doctor was saying to Emily:

"Can you see there in the screen, Emily… your baby is still forming… we can only see those strange shapes… but very soon we are going to be able to see the shape of a baby, your baby…"

The doctor was talking to Emily while he had the part of the machine touching her belly that had gel in it, and they were looking at the screen of the ultrasound machine. Emily was thrilled, of course. Suddenly, the doctor said to her:

"Are you listening to it, Emily? The Baby's heart..."

She had tears in her eyes. She could not even speak. Suddenly, the doctor frowned and said:

"Wait ..." He wanted to hear more, as if paying double attention. He had the stethoscope on his ears and the other part on Emily's belly.

Noticing that the doctor was frowning even more, and saying nothing to her, she started to panic:

"What? Is there something wrong with my baby?"

He was just listening to the sound of the baby's heart.

"Doctor, please, is there something wrong with my baby?"

"Emily, I'm pretty sure that it seems that we have more than one baby in here… it is still too soon to confirm from the images, but I'm pretty sure…"

She opened her mouth wide and frowned more than ever.

"Emily, definitely, you are going to have twins! Congratulations!"

Emily was in shock. She said:

"A...A...Are you sure?"

"I cannot be sure about the sex of the babies right now but I am pretty sure that they are two babies…Probably during the next exam, about one month or so, we'll be able to find out the sex…but I'm sure there are two babies on the way... Are there any cases of twins in your family, or in the family of the father?"

Emily was still in shock. She said:

"I...I...don't know... I mean... not that I know..."

* * *

><p><strong>One month later:<strong>

A little more than one month had passed since Emily knew she was going to have twins, and she also already knew that she was going to have a boy and a girl. She was trying hard to follow straightly all that the doctor had prescribed to her. She was also doing very well at work. She was always chatting by emails and phone with JJ, Reid, Rossi and Penelope, but she never told about the pregnancy, since it involved Hotch and he, being a boss, could get in trouble having impregnated a subordinate. She would wait to surprise the team, and she was thinking that depending on the way things would go, she would never tell, if Hotch never look for her again. But she was very sad also because she never heard from Morgan again, and she knew that she had no right to bother him.

Hotch had also not looked for her. It was painful for her too. But she knew that he was cold and controlled. And she also knew that his scale of priorities in his life was: work, work, work, work, work, work (zillion times work), then, Jack, leaving a very little space for the rest, the other things, where she fitted within.

* * *

><p><strong>Another month later:<strong>

She was entering the fifth month of pregnancy now, and she was already showing the beautiful pregnant belly.

Clyde had returned home after nearly two months out. He arrived home around 3 pm, on a Saturday. Emily was resting in the rocking chair on the balcony. Sergio was lying beside her, and she was feeling good. Before he joined her, he just watched her from afar, then he decided to joke with her, by saying:

"How nice to come back home to my wife and baby ..."

"Keep dreaming ..." She mocked.

"Hello, darling ..." He planted a kiss on her forehead, and sat in an armchair next to her.

"Wow…I see that my big boy has grown!" He said, looking at her belly.

"Clyde ..." She said softly but in a reproachive tone.

"What's wrong? I bet this baby will love me!"

She laughed:

"You're so pretentious…"

"Oh, Em, I bet he will love me… he'll enjoy going to rock concerts with me… we'll go watch soccer on Sundays… and I will teach him how to tame the female beasts as well like I did with you ..."

Emily smiled at him as if what he was saying was a big joke, and she gently placed her hand on her belly and said:

"Please do not listen to this, babies..."

"BABIES?" He asked, frowning.

Emily let out a shy smile and said:

"There are two babies in here ..."

Clyde smiled happily surprised at her and got up to hug her, saying:

"Oh, Em,... Congratulations!"

Then he looked at her in the eyes and added:

"I'm very happy for you!"

"Thank you…" She said smiling.

"Have you told to the father?"

Emily looked at down and took a deep breath, then, after a while, she said, still looking down:

"No..."

*Moments of silence*

Showing that she did not want to talk about this, she said, looking at him now:

"Clyde, are you okay with this? I mean… with me staying here... even if we... never... ever going back to be a couple again? … I need to be completely sure about it ... Because I'm really going to need help now ..."

"Emily….You already know me well… and you should already know that I never make personal plans for the future… I just live the life that it is now… and just let it go… And now you're here with me… I love your company no matter what… I love to be by your side… But if it makes you calmer, okay… I do not expect anything from you… romantically speaking… I know I do not deserve anything from you… just as I know your heart is all committed to the father of these babies..."

* * *

><p><strong>Quantico<strong>

The whole team was working intensively for the last few months, almost without a break, including weekends. So, Strauss gave them a few days off to rest.

Morgan was at home, packing a few things. He would make a trip.

Hotch was at home, packing a few things. He would take a trip.

* * *

><p><strong>London<strong>

Emily was at home, Clyde had traveled again for work. It was around 8 pm of a Monday.

She had finished dinner and she was in now in Clyde's office, reviewing a very difficult Interpol case, when Mary knocked on the door. Emily said, without even looking:

"Come on in…"

Mary said:

"Emily, excuse me, there is a man at the gate… he's looking for you ..."

Emily now looked at Mary, and said:

"…A man? What's his name?"

* * *

><p><strong>So, who is there to make Emily a visit? Stay tuned to find out and please, leave a comment… Thank you.<strong>


	13. Chapter 13

**I own nothing**

* * *

><p><strong>Quantico<strong>

The whole team was working intensively for the last few months, almost without a break, including weekends. So, Strauss gave them a few days off to rest.

* * *

><p><strong>London<strong>

Emily was at home, Clyde had traveled again for work. It was around 8 pm of a Monday.

She had finished dinner and she was in now in Clyde's office, reviewing a very difficult Interpol case, when Mary knocked on the door. Emily said, without even looking:

"Come on in…"

Mary said:

"Emily, excuse me, there is a man at the gate… he's looking for you ..."

Emily now looked at Mary, and said:

"…A man? What's his name?"

"It's Mr. Hotchcher…"

Emily froze. She opened her mouth just a little and she was fighting against the physical evidences that he still was there, in her heart. After a little while, she confirmed:

"Hotchner?"

"Yeah, it's something like that..." Mary said.

She was thinking that as he had traveled this far, there was no way that she could not talk to him. Besides, three months had passed already. She was calmer and she was trying to move on without him. Well, in parts, because she had two big reasons inside her that would make sure that she would have an eternal bond with him: her two babies.

"You... you…can... bring... him... here, please..." She said slowly.

"Okay..."

There was no way that she could concentrate now in what she was doing about work. She got up from the chair and started to walk slowly around the huge office, only thinking, breathing slowly, trying to calm her heart. She was wearing a comfortable red dress that was showing perfectly the curves of her five months twins' pregnant belly.

She had her backs to the door when she heard his voice saying 'thank you' to Mary, since she had brought him there, and Mary closed the door. She took a few seconds to turn to face him.

He saw her in her backs, and he only waited for her to turn to talk to her. Then, she turned to face him, to face the situation that she was most fearing but that she was sure that it would happen sooner or later. But for Hotch that was the most beautiful vision that he had ever seen in his whole life. He had already seen a woman pregnant with his baby before, but with Haley was a different feeling.

Now, seeing Emily and her beautiful belly with his baby, wow, it was like fire, he felt a heat all over his body, he could almost feel his blood running faster through his veins as if he was alive for the first time, really feeling the life. He first looked at her belly and then he stared into her eyes: 'Oh no, please don't give me this intense look, no please '... she was thinking while she barely could look at him.

* * *

><p><strong>Chicago:<strong>

After lunch with his mother and sisters, Fran was washing dishes while her two daughters had to come back to work and Derek was at the balcony, on the rocking chair.

After washing dishes, Fran joined him, sitting on another chair there in the balcony. Derek only looked at his mother and smiled at her, sooner breaking the eyes contact, and looking down again. Fran then said:

"Is there something that you want to tell me?"

Derek smiled again, not looking at her this time, but it was a bitter smile, of that ones as if he could not hide anything from her. He said:

"Mom, lucky me you have no interest at working at BAU as a profiler… otherwise they would substitute me for you without even thinking…"

"Derek, I know you all your life… I can not only see things in your eyes but I have this maternal instinct that something is eating you up deep in your soul and heart… you look so restless that I could notice since the moment I put my eyes on you this morning…"

"Yeah, Mom, there is something but… I can handle… I don't want to worry you…"

"Well… that is already too late for that… my heart is already aching for you… you want to tell me what it is… because you know I am always here for you and you know that I am a very good listener… I know your visit is not by per chance and coincidence…"

"Mama… I know I cannot fool you... It is normal for a son to miss his mother and just wants to visit without any reason but you know me too well... anyways…Yes, there is something that is bothering me and I need to tell someone… especially someone that I love dearly like you… It is my heart, Mama, someone owns it and she broke it as it is only a one way love as she loves someone else… I do not know how to rescue my heart from this total heart break damage I feel right now…"

"Oh, God, Derek… who is this stupid girl?"

Derek only smiled, bitterly. Fran said:

"Does this person know about your love for her?"

"I did pour my heart out to her, Mama, but she only feels a deep affection for me… not like the way I feel for her…"

Fran was trying to do her best to comfort her son:

"Derek… sometimes when we are ready to find love and settle… sometimes the other person is not in the same tune and the whole things get lost… are you sure in the past that you and her… maybe … well… that… absolutely nothing showed that you and her could work?"

"In a very distant past, Mom… a friend of us told me that she could be the right one for me… and I did not listen to him… I only said that I could not change my player ways… not even for her… and now I see how stupid I was…"

"But if in the past she was interested in you… so… maybe you can try then… are you sure that it is the end for you two?"

"Well… she told me… even though her kisses tell me a different story… she told me with all the letters that she is in love with other person…"

"Derek… Look… I can only listen to you… and I could say a lot to you… trying to help you and stuff… but the thing is that only you can find the answer for you… you have to search deep in your soul and heart and the answer will be there… you just have to do this and see if there is still a chance for you and her… because when someone loves us… if it is true love… we can feel it… so, if deep in your soul, you find something that you can feel that you still have a chance… so do your best and try… but if don't, Derek, please… don't lose your dignity, go only until the limit of your own self esteem…"

"I am so confused, Mom, that I cannot even focus and realize anything right now…"

"This girl must worth because you're the most precious man in the world… how stupid she is… wow!"

Derek smiled and said:

"She worth, Mom… she worth everything…"

* * *

><p><strong>London:<strong>

Hotch and Emily were at opposite sides of the room. After a long time only looking at each other eyes, Hotch said:

"Hi…"

"Hi…"

"How have you been? How's the baby?" He asked.

"We're fine ... Thanks…"

*Awkward moments of silence.*

"How's Jack?"

"He's great… Thank you…"

*Awkward moments of silence.*

"Have a seat…" Emily said, pointing to the couch.

Hotch sat on a small couch and Emily sat on the other couch.

Emily felt the air becoming dense inside her as if she could not let it go. Breathing was getting difficult. Hotch said:

"Emily… I came here to see if now that it has been three months you can hear me and maybe forgive me for what I said ..."

Emily let out a short bitter laugh, and said:

"Even if I lived a thousand years… as I said before: there is NO excuses for what you said…"

"Okay… I understand that… but…At least, can I explain?"

"There is no explanation for that at all either, Aaron… but since you came here… go ahead ..."

"…I had heard you talking to Morgan… at the police station ..."

Emily struggled with herself to remember which conversation he was talking about. But she remained quiet. It was not a good thing open up things that maybe he even did not know. Hotch kept talking:

"I heard you say that what happened between you and him was just sex ..."

She sent a withering look at him hearing this. Hotch kept talking:

"What did you want me to think hearing this?"

She was pissed now, she said:

"You should have A-S-K-E-D me before you concluding anything with your dirty mind…"

"I know that now… I was totally stupid… But do you have any idea how I felt? That conversation that you had to him made it clear that something was happening between you and him... or that something had happened…"

"What I meant was that what I felt for him was just physical attraction… that's what I meant when I said it was all about sex..."

"But I heard him say that he felt the reactions of YOUR body! Again: what did you want me to think hearing this?"

Emily closed her eyes for a moment, she bit her lip, she took a deep breath and thought to herself: 'OK, I owe him a little explanation', she said, then:

"…Since I came back from...death... Morgan and I have become very close, really close… so I think he's just confused about his feelings...he thinks he's in love with me... and right before things start between me and you… he went to my place and he said he was in love with and I was so needy and tired of being alone that things ended happened few days after and stuff… but they were only KISSES…. and it was BEFORE you...and I tell you… from the bottom of my heart… and I am being totally honest here, Aaron…if I could just choose, I'd fall in love for him without even thinking... because he deserves my love…"

*Awkward moments of silence.*

That last statement had hurt Hotch a lot. Emily kept saying:

"Hotch, what did you think? You really thought that I could push a child to you without having sure that it was yours? How old do you think I am? …Fifteen?"

"From the time you told me, I knew it was mine, from the very first moment, but I just wanted you to know that I knew about Morgan... and I chose the worst way possible…"

"Well, you really hurt me…"

"I know, Emily… I'd do whatever it takes for you to forgive me…"

"Yes… I can forgive what you did to me… but it is difficult to forgive what you did to yourself and to this baby..."

She said that, because in the current situation, he would not be next to her during the pregnancy, perhaps even the birth, much less see the child growing up, etc.

Hotch got up and sat on the same couch as her now. He looked, for a few moments, into her eyes, then, he asked:

"Can I touch it?"

He was referring to her belly. She looked at him in the eyes and she made a huge effort to think about how it would be good for her child because she was still very pissed and hurt with him. She said, without look at him as she was looking down:

"Yes…"

Hotch, then, gently placed his hand on her belly, and started to caress it, very slowly, and then started talking to the baby:

"Hey, little one…it's me… your father..."

Emily swallowed hard, she was still looking down. Hotch was talking to the baby:

"…I'm sorry for the first time we met… I was rude and I said wrong things about you… but know that I already love you… and you're very welcome in our family… and you have a big brother… he is pretty happy that he is going to have a little brother or sister..."

At this time, Emily looked at Hotch and said:

"Have you told Jack about the baby?"

Hotch stared at her, his usual intense look, and said:

"Of course I did… I could not just come up with a baby at home saying that it is his brother or sister..."

They just changed an intense look again until Emily break the eye contact. Hotch asked:

"You already know if it's a boy or a girl?"

Emily looked at him and said:

"Yes..."

Hotch was looking at her in the eyes, waiting for the answer. She said:

"…It's... a boy… and... a girl..."

Hotch instantly smiled at her. His eyes were glowing. He felt his whole body shiver. He was totally speechless, just looking at her in amazement. His face lit up. After a few seconds, he said:

"Emily…Can I give you a hug?"

She immediately thought: 'Damn. How many times have you entered inside me… and now… asks me if can give a hug'.

A little embarrassed, she said:

"Sure ..."

And he hugged her as they were still sat on the couch. During the hug, he stuck his fingers through her hair, and whispered in her ear:

"I miss you so much"...

Her whole body instantly responded to what he said, but before she could start to show it, she got up from the couch very quickly as her heart seemed that could come out of her mouth anytime and her mouth was getting dry, and started to walking around the room again. That had to stop, and had to stop now, she thought. Noticing all her restlessness, still sitting, he asked:

"Emily, come back with me to Quantico…"

She stopped and looked at him. She gave a bitter smile and said:

"It is not that simple…"

As if he had not listened to her, he said, approaching her again now:

"We can start over…"

In front of him but without looking at him, she said:

"I can't just drop everything here..."

"Come on Emily, think…pregnant with twins… how much longer do you think you will still be able to work?"

"I intend to work until the last day of pregnancy…"

"You're are going to need help and I want to be around when you need…"

"Thank you so much… but I am being very well cared here… Clyde let me stay here at his place… and I have all kinds of employees here…"

Hotch was very pissed now hearing about Clyde but he did not want to show it. As if to provoke even more, she said:

"He's actually being very regardful, really…"

"He has to live a thousand years serving you... just to pay for what he put you through in the past... anyways… promise that you will at least think?"

She thought for a while and said:

"That I think I can do…but… Aaron… if one I decide to go back to America… it will be for my children… because I don't want them to grow up without a father… like myself that only used to see my parents on big partier where they need to show me…"

Hotch knew that it would still a battle win the woman back and he knew that he could not even have her back. But, he was kind of relieved because at least he had clarified things with her. Of course that he had not liked even a little the fact of 'his' Emily had changed saliva with Derek Morgan, but he could handle it. He said:

"I'll be in town until the Wednesday… Can we go out for a dinner tomorrow?"

Emily bit her lip as if she was thinking. Then, she said:

"Aaron… I don't think that is a good idea… I mean… I want keep things clear that you ruined any possibility of as future as a couple for us… I know we'll have an eternal bond because of our babies… but… it is only because of them…"

"Emily… please, it is just a dinner…"

"… okay… but… as the father of my children…. Then, I think there is no problem if we go out for a dinner..."

"…And you are the mother of my children and..."

He made a long pause and kept saying:

"… The love of my life…" He said giving her that intense look that could kill any woman.

Emily immediately mentally prayed:

'God, please don't give me that look… I'm able to break into a thousand pieces right here, right now…'

She again broke the eye contact otherwise she could be rolling in bed with him in a few seconds. And, fearing that she could surrender anytime, she said to him:

"It is getting late for me, already… I really need to take some rest… these two here wow… I still have four months ahead until they born but I'm already feeling like my backs and legs are carrying to little Hippos…"

Hotch then approached her again and he tried to look at her in the eyes, but she did not look at him. Then, he said:

"Look at me…"

She did. He said:

"Emily… I have no idea if one day you will be able to forgive me… and I understand that and I was totally wrong… and it was all my fault… but I want you to know that I love you… and I'm going fight for you… until the day I feel in my heart that you don't love me anymore… until I have at least 1% of sure that we can be a happy family along with Jack and our babies…"

She was only looking at him, she said nothing and she was afraid that her look was telling him more than she wanted. She said:

"I… I really need to rest now…"

He took a deep breath and said:

"Okay…"

He gave her a prolonged kiss on the forehead.

* * *

><p>That night, now lying in her bed, trying to sleep, Emily was remembering every word that he had said to her, but the fateful phrase was the thing that was still screaming loudly in her mind.<p>

She knew that they could have a future together, full of love. But she still carried a big pain within her chest.

Torn between the hurt and pain of what he had done for her, and the doubt and uncertainty to give him another chance or not, she knew that she could not let time run down her hands, she had to allow a little happiness for herself.

Shedding a few tears on the pillow, she said to herself:

"I hate that I love you…"

And thinking about Morgan's smile, she fall asleep.

* * *

><p>ON the next nigh, Hotch went to pick her up for the dinner. He took her to a Italian restaurant in London. He had also rented a car.<p>

Emily's thoughts when she was entering the car were something like: 'God, help me not do anything stupid'.

He said:

"You look beautiful as always…"

Trying to maintain a certain distance, she said only:

"Thank you…"

The dinner was nice, they talked about BAU and Interpol and things about the babies, and she told everything about the tests with the babies, etc. During the dinner, he asked:

"Have you thought about my proposal?"

She took a deep breath and broke the eye contact. He insisted:

"Come back to Quantico with me, Emily…"

"The only thing that I can say to you right now is that ... I don't feel like returning… not now… I can't say about tomorrow, or next week or month ... or when the babies are born… as the expression says: 'We plan things and God laugh…' …Cause we know that, actually, His plans for us always prevail… but right now… I don't want to go… I feel like things are not settle yet between us… I'm still deeply hurt and this time here… far from everything and everyone is being very useful for me to figure out a lot of things in my life… and I know that there are a lot of things that I still have to heal and only then move on… with you or not… I have no idea right now… that is why I need to be totally sure before making any decision…"

It fell like a bucket of cold water on the Hotch's head. But he could still see the light at the end of the tunnel. He said:

"We both know that children in the womb already have full knowledge of the outside world and can feel everything… I would not want them to develop knowing that their father is far away… I mean… not feeling the my constant presence around them…"

Emily gave a bitter smile and said:

"You should have thought about this before ..."

"Don't you care about them, Emily?"

"Of course I care about them! I go to the doctor every two weeks… I'm eating correctly more than I did in my entire life… I avoid the most risks at work ...I talk to them every day…"

"I would like to have this opportunity too ..."

"Again, you should have thought about this before rejecting them ..."

"Emily, this is not about me or you, it is about them ..."

"Aaron, I'm not going back with you... I'm not saying I won't go back at all ever again… that I don't know yet… but right now, I'm staying in London…"

'Alright: The woman was irreducible…' Hotch thought. He said:

"I'm going back to Quantico tomorrow… I want you to let me know if you need anything, anytime… please, I want you to know and don't forget this even for a second that I'm here for you…"

He touched her hands on the table and kept saying:

"…and I love you so much…"

Looking at him in the eyes now and seeing that all that he was saying was truth had softened her heart. She was thinking: 'My God… I could grab him by the neck right now and not let him go ever again…'

She had learned a lot from her mother, but the things that she had most learned and practiced was never, ever let be guided by emotions. Elizabeth Prentiss had done a good job in this sector. Then, Emily only said:

"You can rest assured, Aaron… anything that we do need I'll call you…"

* * *

><p>Parked in front Clyde's house, he got out of the car and opened the door for her as a real gentleman that he was. She was wearing a beige dress, with a shawl on the shoulders, as it was getting cold. Hotch fixed the shawl that was showing a little her naked shoulder. She then said:<p>

"I should enter now…"

Took that his hands were already on her, he hugged her very gently in the beginning then he tightened the hug as if the world would end now. He took the opportunity to smell her skin and hair. Still hugging he faced her, looking at her in the eyes. She opened mouth a little to breathe. He looked at her mouth, and he motioned to try to kiss her, but she immediately pulled back her face, whispering:

"No..."

It was not convincing 'no'. Actually, it was the 'no' more 'yes' that he had ever heard, but he decided to respect her.

* * *

><p>For the next month, Emily and Hotch were talking almost every day, mostly about the babies and about how she was feeling, etc. They both were using this excuse, not that he did not want to know about his children but he also was missing her like hell and he wanted to talk to her all the time. She had asked to him to not tell anyone from the Team about the pregnancy, because she knew that it would hurt Morgan and she wanted to tell him herself, and if the team knew about it, they would let Morgan know and she did not want that. Only Rossi knew.<p>

* * *

><p>Around one month later, Emily was six months pregnant now.<p>

Clyde and Emily were at Interpol, inside Emily's fancy office, they were discussing about some new strategy for a difficult case, when a person simply invaded the office without even beating, since the door was only ajar. They instantly looked at the person and Emily opened her mouth and eyes and said:

"…Mother?"

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks for reading...<strong>


	14. Chapter 14

**I OWN NOTHING**

* * *

><p>Ambassador Prentiss had just broke into Emily's Interpol office, interrupting a meeting that Emily was having with Clyde about a difficult operation that Interpol would have to organize. Emily said:<p>

"Mother?"

Holding her purse, Ambassador just looked at Clyde and said:

"Could you excuse us? I need to talk to my daughter ..."

"Mother! …You can not just break into my office like that… we're busy here…" Emily said.

"I'm sorry, dear, but I can not waste my precious time in a 'waiting room'…"

"That's okay… Em, we can finish this later... let me know when you're free…"

Clyde said it picking up some papers that were on Emily's table. He definitely did not want to hear this conversation.

Elizabeth Prentiss was an unbearable person for Clyde. He even bothered to greet her. But also for Ambassador, Clyde's presence was unbearable. They didn't like each other and they just ignored each other. As soon as Clyde left, Emily said:

"What do you want, mother?"

"Aw… Hello to you too, Emily…"

Ambassador said, sitting on a chair in front Emily's table. She said:

"Can't I visit my daughter? Who is living in another country and almost about to giving birth?

"Sure you can, mother, but you cannot just break into my office like that…we're discussing a very important operation... and I'm only six months now… I'm not giving birth anytime soon…"

"Well… three months pass faster than a rocket… sooner than you think you'll be holding an original Prentiss in your hands… and that is why I am here… I hope this man is not the father…."

She was referring to Clyde.

Emily was kind of pissed now. She did not want to answer to this because she knew where this talk would lead, and also she always hated this invasive way of her mother. But also, she knew that her mother could be a very, very tough cookie and that she would not give up easily. So she had to say something. She said:

"Mother… can we talk about this later… I'll ask Mary to prepare a special dinner for us… so we can talk at home at night, okay? Cause…I'm really busy right now..."

Ambassador knew that Emily was trying to get escape from answering her questions, she said:

"Okay, Emily, give me the address and I'll be there at 8pm… and … well… I can open an exception for you because you are my daughter and wait a few hours to have my answer…"

She was referring to the answer about the father of the baby. Emily only looked at her mother while she was leaving the office. Before Ambassador leaves, she still looked at Emily and said:

"…You look very well and… beautiful…"

"Thank you, mother…."

After Ambassador left, Emily called the secretary to ask to Clyde come back so they could continue the meeting. But after about fifteen minutes, he was not there yet so Emily decided to go to his office.

She opened the door and he was on the phone with his backs to the door, looking out through the window. He did not even notice that she was there. The room was large. Still on his backs, he said to the person on the other side of the window:

"Ohhh, honey, of course that I want to see you… but I'm working hard… and I'm traveling again next week… I told you that it would not be an easy task to hold a sneaky cat like me…"

He was kind of smiling while he was talking. Emily was planted there listening to everything, with her arms crossed. Clyde was still on the phone, near the window.

"I promise that when things calm down at work… I'll call you so we can retake those hot nights and make wild sex until dawn..."

"Okay…Julie… I have to go now… I'm in the middle of an important meeting…"

"Oh… Susie… yeah… Susie… Oh no, I'm sorry… Hello? Hello?"

The woman had already hung up, but Clyde did not even care, he turned around, and for his surprise, he come face to face with Emily Prentiss, snorting, standing there, arms crossed, glaring at him, fuming as if she was waiting for an explanation.

She looked nervous but, honestly, he did not understand the reason. But he was a charmer: an expert in the art of conquest, and he knew a lot about women, and a lesson that he had learned was: never, ever talk to a woman in front of another. In the best puppy dog face, he asked:

"What?"

"WWWWWhat? Didn't you hear yourself?" She was almost yelling.

"Em… I was talking to a ... well… I guess this is a private matter…"

"…A private matter? You didn't even know the woman's name! What a shame! You are still the same son of a bitch as ever… using women as if they did not have any feelings…"

"It is not my fault if all the other women are not as hot as you..."

Right now, he wanted to provoke her, and it worked. Oh, it worked! She opened her mouth wide, and frowned and snorted, and she stomped out from there going back to her office and he went immediately after her.

Entering her office and he after her, he said, while she was closing the door:

"I hope all this anger was because of the conversation with your mother… because if don't… I can swear that you just had a crisis of jealousy..."

As if she had been aware only now about her strange behavior, she said:

"What?"

"Emily…. There is no reason for you to act like this…"

And he was right, so she said:

"I… I'm sorry ... I'm really sorry ..."

And then they resumed the meeting. Of course that she didn't love Clyde, but she was feeling so lonely, and plus all the body changes and the hormones, that somehow she wanted him only for her. She knew this was pure selfishness, but she could not help herself.

Emily was feeling tired, emotionally shaken, the children seemed to play soccer every day inside her. She was missing Hotch. She was missing Morgan. She was missing the team. She was missing home. She was feeling alone. She was feeling pain in the legs and backs. She was having difficulty to breathe.

* * *

><p>At that same day, at night, at home, Emily was in her bedroom getting ready for the dinner with her mother. She was wondering with the cat, while she was getting dressed:<p>

"Serg, buddy, what am I gonna do with two babies screaming here in this bedroom, all alone by myself?"

'Two babies screaming! Is it that what I really heard? I think I'll live with the dogs in the kennel … it must be less dangerous…' The cat thought.

Suddenly, Emily heard a knock on the door. She said:

"Come on in..."

It was Clyde. He entered the room and said:

"Hey, Em, would you mind if I did not have dinner with you and your … mother?"

She thought for a while and said:

"I'd like you to stay… but I can not blame you if you don't want to…"

"Is everything okay?" He asked.

She was kind feeling particular worried this evening but she did not want to break in front of her mother, she rather to break in front of Clyde. She said:

"I'm afraid…"

"…Afraid of what?"

She sat on the bed and continued:

"…Of not being a good mother… of failing… of not knowing how to take care of them by myself… of if they don't like me..."

He sat beside her on bed and said:

"Oh…Em, of course you will be a good mother! You already are a good mother! And you will not be alone at all, not even for a second… Mary can help you with the babies all the time… also, we can hire a nanny, or a nurse… you'll be never alone… I promise ... and… of course that they will love you... it is impossible not to love you, Emily…"

She looked at him and she was already fighting back tears. He hugged her and the tears fell. He said:

"Cry, Emily… sometimes is good… you need to vent… it is not good for you and the babies to hold bad feelings… let them all go away with the tears…"

He was making circles with the palm of his hand on her backs. She was calming down. After a little while, he said, kissing her on the forehead:

"I'll be at dinner with you, okay ... What I would not do for you ..."

"Thank you ..."

* * *

><p>During the dinner:<p>

"So… Do you two intend to get married?"

Ambassador was referring to her and Clyde. She thought that it would be a way of her getting the answers she wanted. And it kind of worked. Emily was pissed now, she said:

"Mother, Clyde has nothing to do with this! I'm just staying here... He's being only a good friend…"

"So my conclusions were right…"

"What are you talking about?"

"Well, since he will not be part of the family… I prefer to talk about this privately with you…"

After a little while, Clyde finished eating and said:

"Well, ladies, if you'll excuse me... I have an important meeting with my TV and with the sports channel of my TV cable…"

Before leaving, he approached Emily's chair and whispered to her, but in tone of voice that Ambassador could hear:

"If you need anything: ear protection, or bulletproof vest, just call me, okay…"

"Okay… thank you…." Emily smiled.

"Cheeky!" Elizabeth said angrily.

"Mother… let's talk in the office and get over with it… I need to rest…"

At Clyde's office:

"Emily… what are you thinking? Where do you intend to go with this madness? …of living here in London… working for Interpol... How far do you intend to go with that?"

"Mother… I'm sorry but I don't have to explain my life to you..."

"Emily, this is not about us, me and you… but about the babies ... I am thinking of the welfare of the babies ...you are not being a good mother? Where is the father of these babies?"

Emily could not believe that. She got up from the couch and started to walk around the room slowly while she was thinking. Then, still standing up, she looked at her mother and said:

"How could you say to me that I am not being a good mother? Just you, mother?"

"Yes… you should be in America with the father of you baby! A baby should be born within a family… with a mother and father… and as I can see… your poor baby will come to the world and a bastard… with a father… how could you do this, Emily?"

Emily was really pissed now. She said, facing her mother:

"Why that sounds so crazy to me? Why are you worried about my babies when, in fact, you never worried about me, mother? Have you ever thought about me when I had to change of school every time that I made a new friend? Have you ever thought about me when I could not make friends because of that I was always the weird one of the whole school? Do you have any idea how much it has made me a cold and closed person? I could never truly love or trust anyone, mother…. for fear of losing them ... and how I had to close myself in my own world and build concrete walls around me to protect me… and how it made me the loneliest person in the world... Did you ever, just one time in your whole life, think about me? I can answer this for you, mother: you were only worried about the external appearance… yes… I born within a structured family, with father and mother… but not because you were worried about me… but because you were concerned about what people would think and etc… so you have to show our perfect family… but when the door of our mansion closed, I felt the loneliest person in the world… and I can say that I never knew what was like having a mother and father… a real family… even if it was only to have seat with me during the homework… and mother… I have no idea how the things will work with the father of my baby… but one thing I can promise you: my babies will be the most loved children in the entire universe and I will make sure that they know about this every single day of their lives…"

"…Babies?"

"I'm having twins…"

Ambassador now got up smiling as if nothing that Emily had said, had hit her. She was the master supreme of the compartmentalization. She said to Emily:

"Oh, Em, congratulations…"

"Thank you…" Emily said but she was kind of pissed.

She was also good with the compartmentalization thing but like her mother, wow, she had never seen. Then, Ambassador decided that it was time to talk. She said to Emily:

"I messed up my whole life with you, Emily, I know that and I can not fix it… I know that I have no right to be here saying these things… But I know you very well ... answer me honestly: did you stop, just one second, to think about what you were doing when you left Quantico to escape from the father of your children? Tell me, Emily… did you stop to think about your children?"

Emily did not answer. Ambassador kept saying:

"... So, I'm here to try to avoid that you make the same mistakes that I made...Yes, my whole life, I only thought of myself and my posts and politics… I always put my career above of everything… unfortunately including you… but, what about you? You do not have to answer me out loud… just think… Are you taking the right decisions for these children? You told me that this man (she was referring to Clyde) out there is offering you all the comfort and everything you need ... But tell me: I did it for you my whole life… I covered you with gold, and all the most expensive schools and courses and clothes, and jewelry, and everything that you wanted… and was it enough for you?...You had everything that you wanted, Emily, the best toys, clothes, since a baby you always had a driver available only for you… employees… you studied at the best schools, you learned several languages… but all of that was not enough… even with your father being at home… much more than me…and I know that my absence in your life caused irreparable damages... Therefore, now think and reflect about what you are choosing for your children…"

There was no way Emily disagrees with her mother. But she remained quiet. She was sitting on the couch as she was tired and her legs and backs were in pain. Elizabeth then sat down beside her and said:

"Emily… I'm not going to apologize to you for my mistakes... I know I gave you the world but in what you needed most… which was a hug from your Mom… I failed… But know that I love you, and I've always have…"

Emily looked at her mother. She wanted to hug her, but the abyss between them was still huge. She could not. But she managed to speak:

"I love you too, mother..."

* * *

><p><strong>One month later:<strong>

Emily was seven month pregnant now. She was always talking to Penelope and JJ by phone and email, but she never told them about the pregnancy. And to Hotch as well. But she was missing Morgan like hell now. She was worried about him. Part of her wanted to listen from him that he was not in love with her anymore, and that he had moved on with someone else. But the other part still want to hear that he was still in love with her and that he still wanted her so badly just as before. She had this strong feel that she had would have this eternal unfinished business with him. And he was afraid that this second part was bigger than the first.

* * *

><p><strong>BAU<strong>

Morgan was entering JJ's office when he heard:

"Oh, C'mon, Emily… you have to come to visit us… you know I cannot go there… I have Henry and Will… plus the BAU schedules always so strict…"

Morgan entered JJ's office and sat on a chair in front of her desk. He wanted to hear the talk. Oblivious to the whole Morgan-Prentiss-Hotch triangle, JJ, innocently said to Emily on the phone:

"Morgan is here…"

Her heart became restless and of course that it had something there. She could not say anything at the beginning. Then, still holding the call with Emily, JJ said to Morgan:

"It's Emily…"

He felt the same thing in his heart, and he also could not say anything. Being a good profiler now, of course that JJ realized that there was something in there. In their relationship that had changed. When she was about to ask something, she heard Emily saying:

"Hey, JJ, say that I miss him… and… and… I could not call him… and he knows that reason…"

Listening to Emily on the other side of the line and seeing Morgan in person right there in front of her, she could notice a pain in his eyes. She said to Emily:

"Okay… Emily… I will… take care… I have to hang up now…"

"Say that she can call me anytime, JJ…" Morgan said.

"Emily… Morgan is asking you to call him…" JJ said.

JJ was really confused because she had not said to Morgan what Emily had asked her, but his answer was as if he knew what she had said. She was really confused now.

"Oh… okay… I will…" Emily said.

As soon as the two women hung up the phone, JJ said to Morgan:

"Do you want to tell what is going on?"

"Yeah… I can tell you… nothing… unfortunately nothing is going on…" Morgan said, sadly.

With this answer he was leaving JJ's office, saying:

"Hotch wants us to…"

Well, they would have a meeting to discuss a new case.

* * *

><p><strong>London – few days later:<strong>

It was a Saturday, around 4 a.m. Emily woke up from a dream. She was sweating and her heart was racing fast. She had dreamed about the day that she slept in Derek's arms but in the dream, she had never stopped him.

Making some mental math, she realized that in Quantico it was only 10 p.m. and he would probably be woken. She needed to talk to him, she could not continue to ignore that huge lump inside her throat that sometimes made her feel like she would have triples and not twins.

She decided to call him, five months without any kind of contact. She picked up the phone and dialed.

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks for reading…<strong>


	15. Chapter 15

Hi guys... I'm sorry... this is not a chapter.

This is only an explanation...

First l want to thank you for reading this story and comment, means a lot to me...

Then... I need to say that you guys must be all confused about with who Emily will get in the end, Hotch or Morgan...

As the summary says, this is a triangle... she thinks she loves Hotch as she has a strong feeling for him that she thinks it's love... but she also has strong feelings for Morgan (who wouldn't?)...

Said that, i want to say that everything can happen! For those who read the first version, she was torn between them until the day of her wedding, and it was just for a millisecond the she just does not run away from the wedding to go to meet Morgan and stay with him... as l was really intending to do that.

So... about me: I love both Hotly and Demily... on the show, l think she loves Hotch.. but her connection with Morgan is always soooo... like a connection of souls...

About this story: someone asked me if it will be a demily... and the answer is: I don't know! Everything can happen. I know that l will disappoint Hotlys if she gets with Morgan in the end; just like l will disappoint the entire demily team if she gets with Hotch. But I'm being honest: I still haven't decided, and you can help me with suggestions and comments and etc.

Thank you...


	16. Chapter 16

**London – few days later:**

It was a Saturday, around 4 a.m. Emily woke up from a dream. She was sweating and her heart was racing fast. She had dreamed about the day that she slept in Derek's arms but in the dream, she had never stopped him.

Making some mental math, she realized that in Quantico it was only 10 p.m. and he would probably be woken. She needed to talk to him, she could not continue to ignore that huge lump inside her throat that sometimes made her feel like she would have triples and not twins.

She decided to call him, five months without any kind of contact. She picked up the phone and dialed.

* * *

><p>Morgan was at home making out with on the sofa with some bitch that he could not even remember the name when his phone started to ring. At first, he decided to ignore, but since the person on the other side was insisting too much, he decided to answer it. He said to the girl still between hot kisses:<p>

"Sorry, babe… I really have to answer it… it can be from my work…"

He took the phone and didn't recognize the number. He said:

"Morgan…"

The other person didn't answer, and he tried again:

"Hello? …Anybody there?"

Felling a big restlessness on her heart, Emily finally managed to answer. She said:

"Hey… Derek… it's me…" Her voice was cracking and she wondered where all the connection between them had gone since she seemed so nervous only by a phone call that she was making to him.

On the other side, while holding the phone, Derek took the other hand on his head as if he could not believe that it was her. He looked to the gorgeous woman that was almost naked on the sofa, waiting for him, he swallowed, and he said, trying to avoid that Emily listened to it:

"I'm sorry… I really need to answer to this…"

He went to his bedroom to talk in private to Emily. Once there he said:

"Hey, Emily… wow… I'm finally listening from you… I was not expecting this anymore…"

"Derek… I'm sorry if you're busy… I just wanted to… to…"

She could not complete the sentence as neither she was sure about the reason that she was calling him. He said:

"No, Emily… I… I'm not busy at all…"

*Awkward moments of silence*

Emily then said:

"Derek…I am so sorry that I have not talked to you for such a long time… even though I missed you so much during all this time… I was avoiding you because I did not want to hurt you even more… but…I… I miss you… and that there was not even a day that I did not think about you…"

Lately, her hormones have been all over the place and very actives, she was more emotional than ever. Derek then said slowly and softly:

"Emily… Please… I am so tired of this situation… and I appreciate that you called me… but I'm going to ask you: don't say that you miss me unless you show me this... don't say that there was not even a day that you didn't think about me if you are not in love with me... because it is getting really difficult for me to understand that… when your actions do not correspond to your words…"

"I… I… I'm sorry… Derek… I'm really sorry for everything…"

She was already apologizing for not telling him that she was pregnant with Hotch's babies! And she just could not tell now. She didn't have the strength for that. Derek then said:

"Emily, I know that Hotch hurt you… and that is the reason why you go so far away around the world to London…. I do not know the details of what happened between you two… but … Please… come back where you belong…I'm trying to move on without you but we can always be friends… I promise… and one day if you think that there are no more chances with him… I'm gonna always be here for you… I promise…"

"Oh… Derek… Thank you… I… I… I just do not know what to say… I just wanted to hear you voice but I know that I should not be calling you…"

At the moment, the hot girl that Derek was about to fuck entered his bedroom looking for him. She was very sensual. Derek just looked at her and he was still on the phone with Emily. While he was talking to Emily, the girl hugged him from behind and started to bit his earlobe provoking him.

"… You can call me anytime…" Derek said.

"Yeah… but this person definitely chose the wrong time… bad, bad timing…" The hot girl said very closed to the phone so Emily could hear it. She said:

"Oh, Derek… you should have told me that you were… oh… I'm sorry… bye…"

Emily hung up the phone quickly before Derek could say something. She thought:

"Oh, my God… he is with someone…"

And she felt that all the love that Morgan had once declared for her was gone. She felt empty now, needy. She knew that she had no right of anything related to Derek, since she had always dumped him. But now, knowing that he was with a girl had really hurt her.

* * *

><p>A few days later:<p>

On the morning, even before she could get out of bed, her cell phone rang:

"Hey ..."

"Hi, Emily, how have you been?"

"Oh, I'm so tired and afraid..."

"…Afraid of what?"

"Of not being a good mother… and … a lot of things…"

"You already are a good mother… Everything will be alright…you will do just fine… I'm sure of it ..."

"I'm not so sure, Aaron…"

"Put the phone…. I want to talk to them…"

Emily placed the phone on her belly. Hotch said to the babies:

"Hi… you two little ones… it's me… daddy… I've said it a million times… but I'll say it again: the fact that I'm away from you guys doesn't mean that I don't care… it's just because of work… but I love you two so much already and I want to ask the help of you two… please… don't tired Mom too much okay… and I promise that I will do my best for us to be a happy family ..."

When he said 'for us to be a happy family', Emily had already placed the phone back on her ear. She said:

"Do you think you'll be here for the birth?"

"BAU has stack of cases that we are not having weekends anymore… but I really want to and I'll do my best..."

"I really appreciate it…" She said.

"Have you thought about names?" He asked.

"Ah, a few… but I can use your help on this…" She said.

"I have a lot of names in my head already…" He said.

"Me too… let's do like this then: you choose the name of the girl… and I choose the name of the girl, okay?" She said.

"Sounds perfect to me, Emily…" He said.

"Okay then… but…I do have to agree…" She said.

He smiled and said: "Sure…"

"…And we're gonna to do that when we look at their faces..."

"Yes…we can do that…"

"Aaron, we better get ready for work now otherwise we both will get late… I have a really busy day today…Give my love to Jack…"

"Okay… I will… and I hope to see you soon…and take care…" He said.

"Yes… I will… so do you… in the field… don't forget that you have two more reasons to live for now which are your babies…" She said.

"I'd say three more reasons…" He said, referring to her as well.

She said nothing but she had liked to listen to it. He said:

"Bye, Emily…I love you…"

"Bye, bye…" She said.

* * *

><p>The next few months were the same talks on the phone with Hotch since he wanted to know about the birth and that if he could be there for the day, etc.<p>

* * *

><p>She was now almost nine months pregnant. It was two in the morning, when Emily broke into Clyde's bedroom yelling:<p>

"CLYDE… I'm in pain…Clyde…get up this fucking bed…"

She could barely stand so much pain she was feeling now.

Clyde's first reaction was to open his eyes to check if she was really screaming inside his bedroom or if it was a nightmare. But it was not. It was real. He quickly got up from the bed only in his underwear and dressed a jeans and a tee. She was in her cetin robe. Clyde took the baby bag on his shoulders and took Emily on his arms and placed her on the SUV in the back seat, and rushed to the Hospital.

* * *

><p><strong>America: <strong>

It was 8 p.m. The whole BAU team was working on a difficult case in New York City. They were there for two days now. They were gathered in police station delivering the profile, when Hotch's cell phone rang. Hotch, Rossi, Morgan and JJ were delivering the profile to a lot of policemen, researchers and delegates. Hotch then took the cell phone from his pocket and saw Emily's picture on the screen. He had to answer, so he said, more to himself:

"Excuse me…"

He only stepped back to answer to the phone so everyone could see it. He answered the phone:

"Emily… is everything okay?"

He knew that was dawn in London, so he instantly got very worried.

She could barely talk so much pain she was feeling now as she was having too much difficulty to breathe. She said:

"Aaron ... (breath, breath)….. it's me… I… I'm in pain ... Clyde... is ouchhhhhhhhhhhhhh (she screamed a lot in pain) taking me to… to the… ouchhhhhhhhhhhhhh... the hospital…"

Realizing that she could not even talk anymore, Hotch said:

"Okay… okay… I got it…"

Emily still said:

"…if you don't hurry... you're... gonna... miss ...the birth ...of ...your children... ouchhhhhhhhhhhhhh…"

"...okay… okay… try to remain calm… I'm on my way…"

Emily wanted to ask him to go to hell or fuck himself when he heard him asking her to remain calm when she seemed that she would explode anytime, but she was too much in pain to even think about something. They hung up the phone and Hotch looked at Rossi and said only:

"Dave…"

Hotch was now the personification of despair. His face expression could be defined by only one word: panic.

Of course that the master profiler David Rossi could 'read' the entire situation straight, he only said:

"Go, go ... I'll take care of everything…"

Everybody saw, but nobody understood anything.

* * *

><p><strong>London:<strong>

She was having too much hard time even to breathe. She was screaming in pain like crazy in the backseat of the car, while Clyde was driving like crazy to the hospital. He had dealt with the worst types of people, terrorists, drug dealers, killers, in his entire life, but nothing was compared to this.

* * *

><p><strong>America:<strong>

Hotch was absolutely not sure if he would arrive in time in London, but he had to try, it was the less that he could do. During his lifetime, the work had always come first for him, but now he knew that as much as his work was important to the humanity, and that the sensation of saving lives was highly rewarding for the comfort of his soul, he knew that real happiness could not come only from work, but from a family with real bonds built with love, and particularly for this moment, he knew that his happiness was in the sound of his babies crying coming into the world.

He allowed himself to think about him at least once in his lifetime. Hotch took the next available flight New York - London. It'd be the longest hours of his life.

* * *

><p>At the police station, after Hotch was gone:<p>

The rest of the team finished delivering the profile and then Morgan approach Rossi and asked:

"What is going on?"

"Is there something wrong?" JJ also asked to Rossi.

Rossi and his typical poker face, only said:

"He had a personal problem…"

Well, that, both JJ and Morgan could realize. But it was clear that Rossi would not say anything else. But they focused again on the case.

* * *

><p><strong>London:<strong>

Emily was being carried on a stretcher through the corridors of the hospital, while she was screaming a lot in pain as she was strongly holding Clyde by his tee with too much force, almost tearing it, she was almost choking him, and he was almost falling as he could barely walk along the stretcher. He said:

"Em, Em, p….please ... my tee ..."

"Fuck your tee…"

Actually, he was not worried about the T-shirt, but with the fact that he was almost falling on her, stumbling on the stretcher wheels. But then he chose to remain in silent, better not poke ounce. The woman was totally out of control, and that was totally understandable.

She dropped his T-shirt and grabbed him by the arm, poor thing: she held him so strong that he though that she could pierce his arms. Lucky him that she didn't had big nails now because she was digging her fingers on his skin, searching a way of try to relieve pain, besides the screams, of course.

Clyde was scared about that situation. It was all new for him. He thought: 'What a situation! I didn't even enjoy the best part that was making these children…'

Although Emily had made clear just now who the father was, when she called him from the car, deep down, Clyde, already had an idea that it was Hotch.

Emily was taken to an emergency room for the first checkups, to check the dilatation, etc. A nurse asked to Clyde:

"Are you the father? I am asking because only the father can stay here now…"

Before he could open his mouth to answer, Emily said:

"He is…" Emily said as no way she would be alone now. Besides, she had to have someone to relief all her pain.

During the tests, the pains were giving a break between them now. Emily asked:

"I want my doctor…"

"We already called him and he is on his way… it's past two thirty in the morning. We'll do some testing, meanwhile, okay?"

"What are my other choices?"

Clyde was observing everything from afar. He didn't dare open his mouth not even for a second.

The nurse said then said to Emily:

"Well, you have only two centimeters of dilatation… We have to wait for the doctor to see if he'll do a caesarean… or if he'll wait to see if it will dilate more…"

Emily was having only a feeble pain now, but she was panicking because she knew that it could return anytime. She was talking deep breathes.

The nurse said to her:

"I'll be right there in the infirmary… anything… just pressed that button there…"

"Okay…" Emily said.

The nurse left the room. Emily was lying on a stretcher, already dressed in hospital clothes. Clyde approached her. He held her hand and squeezed it, and with the other hand he wiped the sweat that had formed on her forehead, as if caressing her. After a little while, she said:

"Thanks for being here…"

"You don't need to thank me, Em…"

*Moments of silence*

"So...Hotch?" Clyde asked her as he was referring to the father of the babies.

She bit her lip and said nothing.

Emily was in the infirmary, the pains were alternating between strong and weak, she was doing well with the dilatations, so the doctor had opted for normal birth. At least, they would try.

Emily was getting totally out of energy. She was there for a few hours already, always in pain. Or she was screaming in pain or she was trying to take deep breathes. She said:

"Doctor… I don't know if I can take it anymore… how much longer will it take?"

"Emily, as I said before, the normal is to dilate one centimeter per hour… and it's necessary about ten centimeters of dilatation to make a normal delivery… you have now five centimeters of dilatation… you're having have twins… so we still need a couple of hours… but these kind of things can vary… I'll be observing you all the time… and we can make a cesarean anytime… okay? The dilatation is going well… You think you can hold out a little longer?"

"I'll try my limit..."

* * *

><p>Hotch had managed to catch the flight New York – London, at 8:50 p.m. Thanks to the BAU, he had always his passport in hands. The expected arrival at London Airport was around 3:50. He estimated to reach the hospital at 4:30 in the morning. He prayed that Emily was fine and that children would wait for him to get there.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>London:<strong>

Only Emily and Clyde were at the room now. The pains were getting unbearable for her now, she managed to ask:

"Clyde, what time is it?"

"3:40…"

Knowing what Emily was talking about, Clyde added:

"…He should be landed any time…"

He knew that this was exactly what she wanted to know. Let's not, then, upset a woman who is already having her quota of suffering for many generations. Emily said:

"Do you think he'll make it…?"

"I think so…"

Clyde suddenly was kind of sad now, he was there for her the whole time, and now she wanted the man, the man that he knew that was not only the father of her babies, but the man she was in love with. He had no idea what had happened that made her leave him, even being pregnant with his babies, but he knew that she was in love with the man like since forever. But Clyde also had very clear in his mind that he was only a good friend for her that she had no feelings for him, and he blamed himself for it. It was really his fault. Just take it them, he thought. But he would not leave her, not now. No way.

Emily was now extremely exhausted, sweating profusely, and it was passed another hour, it was 4:40 now; but, during the last half hour, she was screaming nonstop, and the dilation was increasing dramatically and the contractions were violent now. The doctor decided that it was time to take her to the operating room.

Emily was on the stretcher, being taken by a few nurses to the surgical center. They had already giving the correct clothes for Clyde to be able to enter with her and be with her all the time. He was holding her hand strong all the time. They were walking through the corridors of the hospital. Emily was screaming in pain.

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks for reading.<strong>

For the Demilys readers, I'm writing a sequel of my story "A Big Surprise From the Past", a new story called: **"Second Changes?"** It you want to take a look…

And… will Hotch arrive on time?


	17. Chapter 17

**I own nothing...**

* * *

><p>The nurses were taking Emily to the surgery room, on the stretcher, Clyde was walking near the stretcher all the way, holding her hand strongly. They were walking through the halls of the hospital on the way to the surgery room in a rush as she was almost giving birth and of course that she was screaming a lot in pain. They would turn the last corner which would give access to the large door of the operating room when they almost ran into someone: Hotch.<p>

He was like crazy looking for her and he finally had found. He immediately approached the stretcher. He gave a 'one second' mortal stare at Clyde, as if: 'fuck off!', and he held Emily's hands. Emily was in so much pain she could not even react to significant change of man who was standing beside her, not that Clyde meant nothing for her, but Hotch, well, it was Hotch: the father of her children, the man that she was totally in love with, the man who had traveled an ocean to be with her at that moment.

The doctor and nurses didn't understand anything, but there was no time for figure out anything right now.

* * *

><p>Inside the surgical center:<p>

Emily was sweating from every pore of her body as she was making an enormous effort. With one hand, she was holding the iron bar of the stretcher, and with the other hand she was holding hands with Hotch, in a way that it seemed that their hands were only one thing, so glued they were. The doctor was saying to Emily:

"Push, Emily… just push… almost there… I can see the head… push…"

Of course that Emily was screaming a lot in pain. She could not even think, much less talk. Hotch said:

"C'mon, Emily… you can do it… push, babe…just push… you're brave and strong… C'mon…"

Emily had now tears mixing with the sweat that was trickling down her face, she made another huge effort, pushing hard now, within few seconds and they listened to one of the babies crying. Hotch could not believe in that vision of seeing his son being snatched from inside her. He took deep breathes in order to not faint right there. It was a totally magical moment for him. He had happy tears forming in his eyes. But, there was still another baby to come out. So, Hotch kept holding her hand, strongly as he could and supporting her the way he could:

"C'mon, Emily… you're almost there… just push again… push hard, dear…"

Emily then took a deep breathe and she made another huge, enormous effort and they finally listened to the other baby crying coming out of her. She finally relaxed all her body as she was almost fainting and she felt a little dizzy as well. She was exhausted, extremely tired, breathless, powerless, she couldn't even think. The nurses then brought both babies for her to see them, and she was crying in happiness, seeing her babies for the first time.

She was holding the boy and Hotch the baby girl.

"Did you choose her name already?" She asked to him.

"Yes..." Hotch said.

He had tears in her eyes, staring at his daughter in his arms. Then, he looked at Emily and said:

"Valerie… Do you like this name?"

Emily smiled and said:

"Yeah…I like it…"

Emily looked at face of her son, in her arms, then she looked back at Hotch and said:

"What about Thomas for him? Do you like Thomas?"

Hotch smiled and said:

"I love that name…"

He bent down a little to give her a kiss on her lips, and still with their mouths connected, he said:

"I love you…"

She didn't say it back, but he knew that she loved him as well, so, that was okay and enough for him.

* * *

><p>A few hours later, Emily had already left the operating room. She was now in a room, still in the hospital. They had to make some tests on the babies to check their health so they could leave the hospital.<p>

It was eleven a.m. in London and she had just had breakfast. The babies were in cribs beside her all the time. Hotch had called Rossi to tell about babies and to know about the case, etc. He also called Jessica and talked to Jack to tell him about the babies, Valerie and Thomas.

Hotch was now standing staring at his babies. Emily was in bed. She asked him:

"Where's Clyde?"

Of course that the man, Hotch, did not like to hear that. He said:

"I have no idea… Wish he was in Mars…"

"Aaron, he is being so caring and patient with me… please give it a break..."

Hotch approached her to say:

"I don't like him... I don't like the fact you are at his place…"

At that moment, the same nurse that was all the time with Emily entered the room to make a few tests on the babies and Emily asked her:

"Where is the man that came with me?"

"He's in the hallway…"

"Could you ask him to come here, please?"

"Yeah, sure… I will just make the Guthrie test on the babies and I'll call him…"

"Okay… thank you…"

Hotch then said to Emily:

"Well… I'll take then this time to register the babies as I saw that they have a notary's office here in the Hospital…"

And he kissed her on the forehead. She said:

"Okay…"

He looked at her and said, as if to confirm the names:

"Thomas Hotchner and Valerie Hotchner?"

"Sounds perfect…" She said, smiling.

Hotch and the nurse came out of the room almost at the same time. And the nurse asked Clyde to enter the room

Clyde entered and he approached Emily and kissed her on the forehead. He asked:

"How are you feeling?"

"Like if a truck had ran over me and taken out all my internal organs…" She said, joking, then, she added:

"But I'd do it all over again and again and again…"

Clyde smiled at her and approached the cribs to see the babies. He said:

"Hey… big boy, so, it's with you that I'll spend the afternoons of soccer, and teach how to win the most gorgeous girls, huh…? And you… pretty girl… beautiful like your Mom… I'll run after the boys that mess with you and that is a promise, huh, darling…"

Of course that Emily knew that would never happen. They both knew that he was just playing. Then, Emily said:

"Clyde… I really want to thank you for everything… for being here with me, for being so patient when I know that your patience quote is almost zero… and I promise buy you a new tee…"

He approached her and said:

"Em, again, you do not have to thank me for anything… you bring so much color and lightness to my life and we both know that I have an eternal debt with you..."

Emily looked down, the lest thing that she wanted to remember now was Ian Doyle and all the whole thing again, as she was feeling so happy. Clyde said:

"I'm going to Interpol now… I'm not coming back here the hospital for obvious reasons… but I'll wait for the three of at home… Anything, you call me anytime, okay?"

"Okay… thank you again…"

He was leaving the room and he almost bumped to Hotch that was entering the room again. He showed the documents to her, the register of the babies. Then he approached the babies, they were peacefully sleeping. He looked to Emily and asked:

"You're coming to DC with me, right?"

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks for reading... it's a short chapter but as always I'll update very soon...<strong>


	18. Chapter 18

**I OWN NOTHING**

Still in the Hospital, Hotch asked to Emily:

"…You're coming to DC with me, right?"

Before Emily could answer, the doctor entered the room and answered for her:

"No…"

Emily and Hotch looked at him, and he added:

"I'm sorry to intrude myself in a family matter, but the babies cannot make such long trip… at least a month…"

"Oh my God! Why not? Is there something wrong with them?" Emily asked nervously.

"No, Miss Prentiss… your babies are healthy… but it is highly recommended that they only travel by plane after the first two months of life… when they have received a huge package of vaccines already…. Until this age, babies are totally unsecured immunity against anything… Especially if it's a trip by plane and during so much time... With the pressure of the flight, the secretion of the throat can climb the tube that connects the ear nose and throat… Babies can feel a terrible pain at the moment and then an infection can arise... As you can see, the risk is high, but the final decision is yours, it is up to me, though, warn you both…"

Emily and Hotch remained silent only paying attention to what the doctor was saying.

"Well, we will make the lasts exams on the babies and probably tomorrow morning you all can go home… Now in the afternoon, the nurses will help you with the first babies bath… it is advisable that the father participates too, since they are twins and two baths… and they will also teach how to breastfeeding..."

The Doctor said everything that he had to say and left the room. Hotch then approach Emily and said:

"Emily, then, if we'll have to wait two months for you to get back to DC… so, I want to rent a place for you to stay… I can hire a nanny, a nurse so they can help you… I really wanted to be able to stay here with you… but you know that I can't leave... "

Emily cut him off:

"I'm staying at Clyde's… There is no reason to rent another place… he has a lot of employees available… I already bought the cribs… Clyde is always traveling. There is no reason for me to stay in another place…"

Of course that Hotch had not liked it, but he remained quiet. Emily still added:

"…And you're talking as if you were absolutely sure that I'm coming back…"

"I'm just assuming that you'll want to do the best to our babies… that is having their family together… their mother and their father…"

He took a deep breath and sat on the bed beside her. Emily was sitting up against the headboard.

He looked straight in her eyes. He took her hands and asked:

"Do you still love me?"

Emily was able to look at him for a while but then she broke the eye contact as if to avoid that he could see something in her eyes. Then, she said:

"Hotch… it is not that easy… I'm still hurt… what you said to me was horrible… heartless… I never expected that… and I had not done anything wrong… you just assumed wrong things about me… and the fact that you said it only to hurt me and let me know that you knew about something that did not even existed… this hurt me even more…"

"Emily, I said I'm sorry… it was wrong, I know, I recognize and I regret this with every fiber of my being… I know you love me… and I love you… please…"

It was getting difficult for her. This look of him from afar was already difficult to resist. Imagine so close how they were now. Wow. She felt naked, as if he could see her soul. She said:

"I'll think…"

Hotch first kissed her hands that were on his, then he kissed her lips, gently, one, two, three times and in the third time, he kept pressing the kiss until she give in, and he kissed her passionately.

Before coming back to DC, Hotch took many pictures of the babies and Emily to show to Jack. He also took Emily and the babies to Clyde's.

**About 20 days later:**

Hotch and Emily were talking almost every day by phone, and she put the phone on the babies' ears for them to hear their father's voice.

It was a Saturday and Hotch finally had a day off. He left their apartment very early in the morning talking Jack with him. They were in the car on the way to somewhere that Jack didn't know where it was, so he asked:

"Where are we going, Daddy?"

"It's a surprise, buddy… but I think you'll like it…"

"We could go swimming, Daddy!"

"Do you want to swim, buddy? …How about a playground and a soccer field?"

"Wow, Daddy, that would be awesome!"

"…And how what about having some dogs and an aquarium full of fishes?"

"Wowww, Daddy, I always wanted to have a dog! Can we have a very big one?"

"We can have the dog you want, buddy..."

"Wow, Daddy, that's awesome! But Daddy… how the dog will run with me into the apartment, there is no space…"

"Well, we can fix that..."

"…Can we? How?"

"We can move to a place where you have plenty of space for you and your little brother and sister, and a dog, and fish, and a pool, and a playground and a soccer field, and everything you want buddy…"

The man was really happy, and how many years that he did not feel like that. He finally parked the car in front of a beautiful house inside a very secure condo that had a plaque written 'for sale' on it. Jack yelled:

"We're buying a house!?"

"Yeah… buddy, we're buying a house!"

Hotch looked in the rearview mirror to see the happiness on the face of his son, who was in the back seat.

"…And Thomas and Valerie will play with me daddy?"

"Well, they are still babies… you'll have to wait a little bit ..."

"I want to meet them, Daddy…"

"They still cannot travel… but in about one month… I'll go get them…"

"Okay, daddy… Can I go too?"

"We'll see buddy..."

Of all the houses that Hotch had seen by internet during the week, he had liked that one the most, so he had dealt with the broker to meet him there to talk about the price and etc.

The place was safer. It had a quiet neighborhood, a big garden and backyard for the children, a swimming pool, a small soccer field, and some trees. It would be a surprise for her.

After walking inside the house and seeing that the house was practically new, Hotch was talking to the broker and Jack was running around the new house. Hotch said:

"I'll buy that one… When do you think we can move in?"

"I believe that the documents will be ready for the next week… So think next weekend you can already move in here… You made an excellent choice Mr. Hotchner, there was a lot of people interest in that house…"

"I liked it very much, it is perfect for my family…and I believe that my future wife will love it as well…"

"I bet she will…"

At that moment, Jack came running to Hotch, saying:

"Daddy, Daddy, there is a kennel in the backyard and a wooden house on top of the tree!"

"Oh! That's great, buddy!"

"Can I go play in there?"

"Daddy is still buying the house, Jack… but you will have a lot time to play up there, okay ..."

"Come see it daddy… come on…"

Hotch went with Jack to the backyard, and the broker remained filling out paperwork.

"Look daddy, there is a little house on top of the tree… I always wanted a tree house, Daddy ..."

Jack was saying and pointing to the house on the top of the three. He was really happy. And Hotch was also happy in seeing his son so happy after so much tragedy that he had suffered. He said:

"Now you have, Jack… We just need to fix that stairs... Then you can go play up there..."

"The babies will be able to play with me, Daddy?"

"Well… like I said… only when they grow up a little more, okay…"

"…And if their mom doesn't allow them?" Jack said, a little sad.

"Oh, Of course she'll allow…I bet she will..."

*Moments of silence*

"Miss Emily will also be my mom, Daddy?"

Hotch bent down in order to face his son. He said:

"Look, Jack, you already have a mother… she is now in heaven now as you now… with Jesus and God, taking care of you from there, remember?"

Jack nodded.

"…And I can bet that she would be pleased to have another Mom to help me to take care of you until you grow up… and be a big man… and I bet she'd be even happier if this person was Emily… So, buddy, if you want, Emily will be another Mom for you… She loves you... Do you want it?"

Jack nodded, smiling shyly.

Hotch, now, looked deep into his son eyes and said:

"Good... And, Jack... Daddy wants you to know that… no matter what… I love you and I always will..."

"I know…I love you, too, Daddy..."

Jack gave a big hug on his Daddy.

**London**

A few weeks later, Emily was in her bedroom, she was breastfeeding Thomas, while Valerie was already sleeping on the crib. Lucky for Emily they were nice babies.

As the door was ajar, Clyde entered the bedroom without knocking. He said:

"Ops, I'm sorry, Em…"

"That's ok… Clyde… it is not as if you had never seen my boobs before…"

"Not like this ..." He replied smiling.

"They are really nice…" She said, while she put a cloth diaper to cover while she was breastfeeding Thomas.

"Yes, they are…. Well, I just wanted to let you know that I'm home…"

"Okay… that's good… I… I want to talk to you later…"

"Okay… Anytime…"

"I'll just finish up here..."

"Okay…I'll wait for you in the office..."

"Okay…I won't be long… he's almost sleeping…"

Suddenly, a strange feeling of fear gripped Clyde. His heart broke a little as if he could foresee something. He was an expert in foreseeing things, but this time, he was praying that his intuition could be mistaken.

He went to the office and prepared a whiskey for himself and stood there waiting for her, only thinking.

After about half an hour, she went to talk to him. Emily had asked Mary to be with the twins while she was talking to Clyde.

She entered the office. Clyde was sitting on a chair, head down, savoring his drinking. Emily only sat on the couch next to him, but even before she could say something, he said, without looking at her:

"Are you leaving, aren't you?"

She took a deep breath and said:

"Clyde… I really want to apologize… I'm really sorry... I... I really wanted this job when I accepted it… but I didn't realize how intense all this situation would be… I spent the last month only thinking… and I just can't… I mean… there is no way that I can raise my children too far from theirs father… it is not fair with them… This will be impossible for me… I have to think about them now over all my own wishes… I don't want that it sounds like irresponsibility just quit the job now and leave… I want you to understand that they are priority for me right now... Yes… I knew I was pregnant when I left there… yeah… I knew… but I left there without thinking…. and I want to do the right things for my children now, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry…"

Clyde was just listening to her, he wasn't actually worried about the job, but about how the life would be now without her again, when he come back home and not find her there anymore, because every little piece of the house would reminded her now, even that they were only friends, he would miss her like hell.

But he could not ask anything from her. She had not promised him anything, on the contrary: she always made it very clear that there would never be anything between them, and that their past was well buried. Seeing that he was only thinking, she said:

"Say something…"

"Everything will be okay with the work, Em… I mean, it is big loss to Interpol… it is really hard to find someone competent to this important post… but I agree with you… you have to think about your babies above everything now…"

"…And I also want to thank you for what you have done for me during all these months… for all your patience with me… It meant a lot to me…"

Only now he looked at her and asked:

"You think you can forgive me now… for my mistakes from the past?"

She looked at him and took a deep breath and said:

"I don't know, Clyde… That whole thing left me many scars in my soul… they will not ever go away… and I'm not referring to the clover scar or on my belly… But I can tell that it was a start… Only I know how I felt when I had to go to bed with that scary man for the first time… I fell for him, yes, somehow I fell in love with him… but it was a long process… And that love brought me nothing but pain… because it hurt me as lot when I had to betray him and delivery him in a tray for the Interpol… and also knowing that little boy had no one for him…anyways… there were too many sorrows…"

Clyde the put the drink on the coffee table in front of them and he sat on the same couch as her now. He started to caress her in the hair, which made her instinctively back off a bit. He looked deeply into her eyes and said:

"…I never said 'I love you' to anyone… not even to my parents when they were alive… much less to any woman… But if I had to tell this to someone… it would be you… because as you know I never was a sentimental type of guy… but I have feelings… and I'm pretty sure that what comes close to love is what I feel for you…"

Emily's heart broke a little for him now. She knew that it was his way of confess his love for her.

He tried to kiss her on the lips as they were so close now, but she step back now, saying:

"Clyde… I'm sorry… I can't… That won't be good for me neither for you…"

*Moments of silence*

"When do you leave?"

"I still have to talk to Hotch… but I think no more two weeks days..."

**After two weeks**

Hotch was back in London to help Emily to move back to America. The twins were now two months. He went by cab to Clyde's and he was putting the package she had in the trunk of the cab. She was taking only a few of her personal things and clothes and of the babies as well. She had left a lot of things for donation. Mary would take care of it. The bags, the cat were already in the cab. Thomas and Valerie were still on the double stroller that would stay for donation. They were outside the house. Clyde was in his office. Hotch and Emily were ready to go, she said to him:

"I'll be back in a minute…I have to say goodbye to Clyde…"

Hotch did not like, he was dying to get off taking Emily from there with him. He only looked at her and she entered the house. She knocked the door of Clyde's office, then, she opened the door and said to him:

"I'm... going now… I ...just wanted to say... goodbye ..."

He looked up to face her, holding a glass of whiskey. He put the glass down the table, and approached her, coming very close to her. He gently held her face with both hands. He looked deeply into her eyes for a moment, and then he pulled her into a big hug, a long very tight hug, a hug of a definitive Goodbye.

Emily broke the hug and she could swear that he had tears in eyes and knowing him, he would be really angry if someone someday realized that he was crying, so she kept quiet. She only kissed him on then cheek and left.

Once Emily left his office, and closed the door, he threw the glass of whiskey against the wall with full force. His wish was to go after her and beg for her to stay, but he knew that he couldn't. He knew that he did have his chance many, many years ago and he wasted it. But he had learned his lesson in the hard way: 'Do not play with the heart of a woman.'

Emily could hear the glass breaking. For a moment, she include considered to go back there, but she didn't. She knew that there was no way back. She said good bye to Mary and the other employees that were all outside. She took Valerie in his arms and Hotch took Thomas. He said:

"Is everything all right?"

"Yeah…" She merely said.

The trip was nice for all of them. They arrived in DC around 4 pm on Tuesday. They were a little tired and babies cried a little, which was pretty normal. The cat was also stressed. Hotch had left his SUV at the airport. He put everything in the car and they left the airport.

Hotch had already provided suitable accommodations for the babies, on the backseat of the car. The babies were sleeping, Sergio was lying also on the backseat, tied by a leash, Hotch was driving, Emily was beside him, only observing the streets, and it seemed like she had never left. She was in complete silence now.

Suddenly, tears started to fall from her eyes. Hotch was paying attention to traffic of course, but he could not help but noticing that she was crying. He said:

"What is it, Emily? Why are you crying?"

She thought for a while and said:

"I don't know… I'm afraid ..."

"Afraid of what?"

"Those two kids, totally dependent on me… I don't know ...if I fail… if I'm not a good mother…"

"Emily, you're not alone… I am here… I'm not going anywhere ..."

"... Until the next case..."

For this, he had no answer.

After a little while, he said:

"Emily, I have everything well planned… we'll talk about it… we'll find a way to make it work… I promise that everything will be alright..."

Hotch was driving for a little more and Emily was not recognizing the place, or the neighborhood. Of course that from London she had made some contacts to get back her old apartment so she could stay with the babies there. She was completely sure that Hotch was taking them to her old apartment. As she was not recognizing the place that they were now, she asked:

"Where are we going?"

He only said:

"We're almost there…"

After more five minutes, they were inside the condo of beautiful houses, and he parked the SUV in front of the house that he had bought for them. Emily looked at the house and looked at him. He only smiled at her, waiting for her reaction.

**Hmm… how will Emily react to this?**

**Thanks for reading…**


	19. Chapter 19

**I own nothing**

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Hotch had parked the car in front of the house that he had bought for him and his family. Emily was looking at the big house and she could not believe in what her eyes were seeing. It was a big surprise for her. In her mind they were no longer together, but Hotch was acting as if they were a married couple.

Seeing that Emily was hesitant, he said to her:

"Emily… I know that what I said in the past was wrong and seeing our two beautiful babies now, I'll regret for the rest of my life for what I have said but I always knew they were my children... Please, give our family a chance to be happy together… they deserve this… we deserve this… This is OUR place… this is our new beginning…"

She was speechless. She smiled at him only. He said:

"That's our house… I bought it for our family... I'm sorry that I did not wait for you to choose it… but I really wanted to do this surprise for you and I wanted a place to bring our family as soon as you were back…"

"Come on… Let's go inside… I have already bought some furniture… but I left for you to decorate it..."

"Aaron… I… I… don't know what to say…"

Hotch got out of the car and opened the door for her. He reached out the hand for her and said:

"This is our home now… Emily… I promise that I will do my best for you and our family now…"

She got out of the car and hugged him. He said, during the hug:

"I love you…"

She felt totally comforted by him and she only relaxed now, as if she was living the moment. Hotch took the double stroller and they took the babies out of the car; leaving Sergio there as Emily did not want him to vanish.

The house was really beautiful and comfortable and big, it had everything that a family needed. It had four big bedrooms and one big suite that were upstairs, and downstairs it had a large living room, a large kitchen, a large dining room, and an office along with a library, not so large. It also had a beautiful garden in front of the house and a big backyard with high protective walls, a swimming pool, a small soccer field, some trees and a house of wood in one of the trees.

Emily saw the whole house and she was amazed. They were now in the living room. There was an enormous couch there, still with the plastic wrapping around it, because the store had just delivered it in a few days ago. The twins were sleeping in the stroller. Hotch hugged her again and asked:

"Did you like it?"

"Oh… Aaron… I… I loved it…"

"So why do I see these insecurity in your eyes?"

She rolled her eyes and said:

"Profiles….it is that I… I've never had such a lot of happiness like this…I mean… my life was never that perfect… I'm scared…"

Still hugging her, he said:

"Just relax, Emily, I know that everything seems new… for both of us… and it really is a new beginning but I truly strongly believe that it will be only happiness and when things do not seem well… our love… the love of our family will make things work always good… that's why we need to be together… I also myself don't feel so happy like now since long time ago… Everything will be alright…you'll see…"

After a little while, she asked:

"Where's Jack…"

"I'll get him… He's dying to see you and the twins…"

Hotch kissed her on the lips and left. Emily stood there, in the house, she sat on the couch and she was only thinking about everything that she needed to arrange to finish decorating the house. Sergio was also there now and he seemed a little restless. Emily said to him:

"I know, buddy…. I know that it's all new for you as well… this is our new house… and I promise that I'll do whatever it takes for this is our house for the rest of our lives… so you will not have to adapt once again at a new place…"

The cat climbed the couch and lay down beside her. Emily was now caressing him on the head.

After about half an hour, Emily was standing, looking out the window, waiting for Hotch and Jack when she saw him parking the car. The twins were in stroller, sleeping still. Hotch opened the door, Emily approached them and she looked at Jack. The boy gave a shy smile at her. He was holding his father by his pants. Emily reached out her arms and bent down to talk to him and said:

"Come here…"

She hugged him then she pulled back just a bit to be able to look at him. She said:

"How are you?"

"I'm okay…"

"I missed you so much, Jack… I am so sorry the way I moved overseas… but I am back now… with your siblings…okay?"

Jack nodded, smiling, still a little shy.

"Where are they?"

Emily took Jack by the hand to see the babies.

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It was almost night time now so Hotch went to buy something for them to eat as the pantry was still empty and he also bought diapers for the babies. They would sleep there at the house for the first time.

Few hours later:

Jack was already sleeping in his bedroom. Emily put the babies to sleep in the double stroller in her bedroom near her side of the bed. There was no way that she would sleep far away from them.

Leaving the bathroom of the suite, in his pajamas, Hotch asked:

"Are they going to sleep here?"

"Oh… of course they'll…"

Hotch was disappointed. Of course that he wanted to be alone with her, after so much time being totally apart: a whole year. He suggested:

"Emily… they can sleep in their bedroom… we can use the Baby Monitor..."

"Are you crazy? They are two months old only! No way I'll leave them alone…"

"They will not be alone… they'll be in the next bedroom… and Emily...you know the same as me, that the sooner they get used to sleeping in their own bedroom, it'll be better for all of us…"

Emily was now visibly upset and sad. He asked:

"What's wrong?"

"I've never been away from them… since the minute they were born… Never... They are still so young and fragile… and I have to wake up during the night to breastfeed them… so they being here will ease things for me, as well…"

The hope that Hotch had of having her that night went downhill now. He knew he would have to wait. Emily saw his disappointment and said:

"I miss you too… but they are priority for me now…"

"Also for me, Emily… but I don't see anything wrong in them sleeping in their own bedroom… but that's okay… I don't want to upset you in our first night together…"

They lay down facing each other, hugging each other tightly under the covers. Hotch kissed her deeply, slowly, as savoring her mouth, lips, tongue and everything.

Things where getting very hot under the covers, hands everywhere. He had his hands almost in the heaven now when she stopped him whispering:

"No…" It was almost a groan.

"Please…" He whispered back.

"No…Not in front of them…. And… I… I want it to be special…"

Hotch now was trying to think about the murderers, rapists, torturers, maniacs that he had already caught. He wanted her so badly now. But he also had some help from Thomas to break the moment who woke crying a lot for his Mom. It was time to breastfeed the babies. Hotch was only watching the whole scene totally amazed.

While she was breastfeeding Thomas, she said:

"Aaron… we need to choose the godparents…"

"Do you have someone in mind?" He asked.

"…You know I do…" She said.

"I suppose they are more or less the same people as me…" He said.

"Who are you thinking about?" She said.

"You first…" He said.

"Well, I was thinking about…. (She bit her lips before saying what she said next)… Derek and Pen… to Thomas… and JJ and Reid to Valerie… but… (She bit her lips again)… as I think Derek would not accept… we can ask Pen and Rossi… to Thomas…"

"I think we should ask Rossi…. Of course that Morgan would not accept and even if he accepted… it would not be a good idea…"

"…Why not?"

"Oh, Emily… you know… you two have a past which I am not happy about… but I know this is a new beginning for us and I really want to leave the past in the past only…"

"Derek is my friend… my partner… he'll always be… I care deeply for him…"

"…Do you miss him?"

Emily thought it was at least weird so to speak him asking her this question as she knew that Hotch was not the jealous or insecure type. She said:

"I don't see my friends of BAU for almost a year… I miss all of them…If you mean that I miss my friend Derek… yes… I miss him… very much…"

*Moments of silence*

They could only hear the sound of the baby breastfeeding. After a few minutes, he said:

"Do you want to ask them?"

"You can do it, Aaron… since you're with them all the time…"

"Okay… I think I'll offer a dinner so I can use the excuse to show the new house and they will have the pleasant surprise that you're back and with our babies… what do you think?"

"Seems nice…"

That night, Emily closed her eyes to sleep and the only thing that she could think was Derek's reaction to all that.

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For the next week, Hotch was always traveling in cases, and Emily was taking care of the babies and Jack and Hotch had bought a car for her and the decoration of the house was ready now, including the babies' bedroom. But they were still sleeping in Emily and Hotch's bedroom. He was not happy with it, not that he didn't love his children, but he wanted some privacy with his wife.

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It was Thursday when they were returning to the BAU. They were on the BAU jet now, including Garcia. Hotch took the opportunity to talk to them. He said:

"Well…Since we're all here I want to invite you all to a dinner at my new house… I'm thinking about Saturday… if it's okay for you all…"

Everyone looked at him a bit surprised, a pleasant surprise so to speak as Hotch was always so serious, of course that they quickly accepted, except for Morgan who remained in silence. Realizing that Morgan hadn't answered, Hotch asked:

"Morgan?"

Morgan only looked at his boss, saying nothing, but he took off the headphone from one of his ear. Hotch said:

"I really want you to go… Morgan… I'm starting a new stage in my life… I wish you were there…"

Hotch said it, but deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep down, he knew that it was not a good idea. But he felt that he should insist because of Emily. And also he really wanted to settle things between them. They've never been like best friends, but there was always a sincere friendship between them, besides the partnership in work.

"Okay…I'm in…" Morgan replied, but he didn't know if he would actually go.

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**Saturday, the day of the dinner:**

Emily was dealing with the babies' bath. The twins were now three months. Jack was already ready. He was helping his father to finish things for the dinner. They had hired a buffet as Emily was always busy with the babies.

Garcia had asked Morgan to take her to Hotch's. It was a way that she found to be sure that he would go. JJ went with Will and Henry, Rossi and Reid went by themselves.

Reid was the first one to arrive there. He was always on time. Hotch was finishing setting the table for the dinner. He opened the door for Reid to enter. As soon as Reid entered the place, he looked around the huge living room and said:

"Statistics show when a man buy a house this size a very giant size house with everything….not only he plans on having a large increase of family living here but this man plans on living here with said family for the rest of their lives…"

Hotch only smiled to him, forming his cute dimples.

Suddenly, Reid hears a familiar voice coming from upstairs that he was not expecting at all:

"Aaron… could you please help me to take the stroller downstairs?"

Reid frowned and shook his head as if he had lost the reality for a moment. He looked at Hotch who only smiled and went upstairs. Reid looked at Jack, who said, happily:

"I have two siblings, now!"

"You do?" Reid asked as if Jack was in some kind of joke.

Hotch came back downstairs with the double stroller and went upstairs again. Reid was only watching as he was really curious. Looking at the top of the stairs he saw Emily coming down with a baby in her arms and Hotch had another baby in his arms.

"Whoa! Oh, Emily!... wow…" Reid's face was of total astonishment.

.

"Reid! I missed you so much…" Emily said trying to hug him as she had Thomas in her arms.

"Emily, oh… wow… that is a big change of life… you have two babies… wow…!"

"Yeah…"

After the initial shock, Reid was happy that both Emily and Hotch were now happy and starting a family together as they had suffered a lot already in their lives.

In a few minutes, Rossi was already there but it was not a surprise for him, since he already knew about them and the babies.

Rossi was bringing a beautiful bouquet of flowers for Emily. She said:

"Ohh Thank you so much, Dave!"

"Congratulations for the beautiful children! Welcome back, Emily!"

"Thank you, Dave ..."

She hugged him as the babies were in the stroller now.

Not long after that, JJ was also there with her family. JJ entered the large living room. She also took a big shock seeing Emily and the two babies. She could not believe. Her face was of total astonishment now. She said:

"I can not believe it! Emily!"

The two friends hugged, they were totally thrilled. Emily said:

"I am sorry that I did not tell you… but everything happened so fast…"

"Oh… Emily, no need to apologize for anything…I'm so happy for you!"

After a few minutes, they were totally comfortable, Henry and Jack were already running around everywhere in the backyard, playing together. They were talking animatedly. Emily was a bit apprehensive and now she was mentally praying that Derek would not come, but she was managing to hide her worries.

Reid and Rossi and Hotch and Will were downstairs talking and drinking something. The children were playing. Emily had gone with JJ to her bedroom to change diapers of Thomas and talk a bit only the two women. Valerie was crying a lot now, so Hotch took her from the stroller and he was trying to calm her down.

At that exact moment, Garcia and Morgan arrived at the place. Rossi went to open the door for them to enter as Hotch was busy with his baby girl. Penelope and Morgan stepped into the living room. They both frowned seeing Hotch with a baby in his arm, but they thought that the baby could be a distant relative of his. But what they saw next made both of them have extremely opposite reactions, as much Penelope was happily surprised, Morgan was totally devastated and angry and upset and sad and pissed as his heart broke into zillions pieces: Emily and JJ coming downstairs and Emily had another baby in her arms. She almost fell down the stair when she saw Morgan looking at her and she could see and feel his pain. She froze when their eyes met and for a millisecond it was as if it was only them there.

Derek's breath started to accelerate as if he would explode in so much anger. So, before this could happen, he stepped out of the house in a rush.

Emily then quickly put the baby on JJ's arms. She walked by Penelope and said:

"Sorry, Pen, I talk to you in a minute…"

And then she ran into the garden behind a very furious Derek Morgan, leaving an ultra competent team of profilers behind watching everything.

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**What will Emily say to Derek? Will she be able to explain everything to him as he is in totally shock and in anger as well? Can she be able to get him back into the house? Please stay tuned to this same channel to find out what happens next and please tell me what you think with your suggestions, comments and ideas. Thank you very much, love you all…**


	20. Chapter 20

**I own nothing**

Emily was running after Morgan, while he was making his way back to his car, which was parked in front of the house. The problem was that the garden was too big.

"Derek…. Derek…" She was calling as he was walking much faster than her.

Morgan was so pissed now. Yes, she had never promise anything. But knowing how much he was in love with her and she throwing everything on his face like that, it was too much for him to take. He was fuming. Walking fast, without even looking back, at her, he said:

"I don't want to hear a word! …Go back to your happy family!"

At that moment, Emily tried to hold him by his arm, but he pulled it away very fast and continued walking faster than ever. Emily was right after him, walking so fast too as she didn't see a rock that was on the sidewalk. She stumbled and fell down her knees on the sidewalk. Derek, who was already opening the door of his car, instantly, gave a break in his anger and returned to help her to get up. He reached out for her. She took his hand and stood up.

"You okay?" He asked.

"If you mean physically, yes, but if you mean internally, emotionally: no!"

Morgan rolled his eyes and went back to his car. But before he could enter it, Emily said:

"Derek, please: listen to me…"

Very angry, he said:

"Listen to what? There is nothing here to listen to, Emily ... I've already SEEN all I had to see..."

"…Derek, none of this was planned... Everything happened so fast… so suddenly that I myself am still getting used to… I went to London, to Interpol as you know… and I really didn't know if I would come back or not… I was so confused… Please… just give me a chance to explain..."

"You don't owe me any explanation, Emily…. First, you vanish, without a proper goodbye…. and now you reappear with two babies… a family… and practically married! … And you have the nerve to tell me that? And you expect me to believe that everything happened… suddenly? How old do you think I am? Two?"

"But it was, Derek…"

Her voice was fading.

"…I sent you an email and you never answered me…" She added.

He was pissed now, even more. He said:

"Oh, Please! …An email? After all that we have been through together…after all these years together…. you really think an email would be enough? What high consideration you have for me….. Thanks, Emily! …Do you want me to do a silver plate or a billboard in your honor? "

He was being very sarcastic here.

Emily was feeling sad and sorry as she knew that he was kind of right in what he was saying. She had been avoiding keeping him aware of the happenings, but it was always to protect him, but she also knew that this day would come. So, it had been better if she had been honest since the beginning.

But for now, she still had some arrows, and it was time to start using them, and would be now. She knew that it would be a dangerous shot, but she had to take the risk. She said:

"What about you Derek? …What considerations do you have with people, huh? While you're ALL worried about your ego… and about your heart and the feeling that you say that you feel for me… you dropped a wonderful woman in the middle of the living room… who came with you… who has strong feelings for you… in front of everyone… and you came out without even thinking about her… Did you stop for a fucking second to think about her feelings, Derek Morgan? And how she must have felt humiliated… seeing your reaction in front of e-v-e-r-y-o-n-e… when in fact everyone knows how much she loves you? And all of this… not mentioning our friends that are all in there… not mentioning the kids…and… not mentioning my babies that you didn't even care to look at them..."

She was fighting back tears now. She kept saying:

"Have you ever stopped to think about anything but yourself, Derek ? No! Of course not… because you only care about your fucking huge ego! And about 'not knowing how to deal with the fact of failing to take me to your bed'…"

She emphasized the quotation marks with her fingers, and she kept saying:

"…I'm so tired of it, Derek…"

She took a break now to breathe properly and to control herself. Then, she said:

"Do me a favor… Derek… I'm going inside now…"

She pointed with her forefinger to the house, and kept saying:

"…and I'll hope that you'll come after me... But if you don't… know that I'll be eternally grateful for all you did for me… know that I do love you and I will always do… but you can consider our friendship ended here…"

Before she could make her path to the house, he said:

"You ended our friendship when you decided to go away… Just tell everyone that I'm feeling sick… which is not a lie as I am going home to vomit…"

"Derek… if it was not for him… I would be madly in love with you and those babies would have been yours… I am sorry, Derek…"

She was thinking that this would make him feel little better, but it did make him feel even worst. Before he left, she still said:

"I love you… Derek… but not the way you deserve…"

Morgan said nothing. He entered the car, quickly starting it and burning out with the car. Okay, it was not her fault that she did not love him back the way that he wanted her to, but one thing he could choose and he did not have to be a part of all this. Emily was now watching him enter his car and driving away, she was feeling totally helpless now, shedding a few tears.

And so, Emily made her way back to the house without looking back, fighting back tears still because she did not want people, especially Hotch, realized that she had been crying. She really wanted to settle things with Morgan in order to things work out well with Hotch. She knew that Derek would have to become eventually nothing more than a brother for her. And this had to be left clear for him.

Hotch was waiting for her at the door. She passed by him and he asked:

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah… Everything is fine… we… we talk later about this if you want to…"

She went straight to hug Penelope, who was holding Valerie, while Thomas was in JJ's arms.

Looking at the baby in her arms, Penelope said to Emily:

"Oh Emily, you were able to make this little one just like yourself, I'm so speechless… she is a carbon copy of you…"

"Ah Pen… She is prettier than me!"

"Oh…No….she's just like you... She is a miniature Emily… so cute…" Penelope insisted.

"…And this little one here…is just like his father!" JJ said as she was holding Thomas.

"Oh… and we have plenty to talk about, huh..." Penelope said, jokingly.

Emily just smiled.

"Well, while you two are taking care of my precious babies… I'll check the dinner…"

Everybody was acting as if nothing had happened and no one talked about Morgan or about his reason for having left or about Emily going in a rush after him. They were having a really great time, except for Sergio because Jack and Henry were chasing the cat everywhere. Sergio was only thinking:

"Those two little brats… if they catch me I have no idea what they are going to do to me… they might put me in the barbecue for dinner for all I know… I better not let them catch me…"

**During the dinner:**

Everyone was sitting at the table. The babies were sleeping peacefully in their strollers somewhere near there. Suddenly, Hotch took Emily's hand on his and said:

"Emily and I want to ask you guys something…"

"First… I want to say that I am very happy to be here with you all that are like a family to me… I want to say that a since a long time ago… I don't feel so happy like now… with the woman that I love…"

He looked at Emily now and kept saying:

"…and with my three children... I really did not believe that it was possible for me to be this happy anymore… Thank you for everyone for being here and being a part of such special moment for us… So, after saying all this...Emily and I would like to ask you guys something….we'd like to invite you to baptize our children…"

"…And you all can help us to choose who you want to baptize…" Emily said.

"Ohhhhhhhh ... I fell in love with Valerie… the mini Em… She is so sweet ..." Penelope said.

"I'll do a fair division…" Rossi said.

"Penelope and Reid can baptize this cute beautiful baby girl Valerie… and… Will and JJ can baptize Thomas… If it's okay with them…"

Everybody did not even hesitate to agree.

"What about you, Dave?" Hotch asked.

Rossi thought for a while and said:

"Well… I already feel myself like a super "godgrandfather" to all these children in here..."

Everyone laughed and they made a toast.

"Leveraging the toast… I want to say something else… to my beautiful Emily…" Hotch added.

Everybody looked at him, but he was looking only at Emily. She was surprise as she had no idea what was coming next. He said to everybody but looking only at her:

"Since I believe I have found the woman of my life… after have been fighting this feeling for years… and since all my best friends are here…"

He reached the pocket of his pants and got a small velvet box and opened it showing a huge diamond ring, and he said:

"Emily Prentiss, will you marry me?"

Emily shivered from head to toe at the moment, and of course: she opened her mouth wide, as her heart was pounding fast now. She including took a few second to believe that this was actually happening, after all, she had been dreaming about this man, her former boss, since always. She was totally speechless, looking at that big diamond and at Hotch's face, smiling, showing his dimples, with that intense look so typical of him.

"Yes…" She said, and she finally was able to breathe again.

Hotch then put the ring on her finger and he kissed her on the lips. They toasted again and everybody congratulate them, etc. The rest of the dinner and the evening were pretty special for all of them, as they were all very happy, except for Morgan who should be probably alone at home and for Emily that was worried about him.

**After the dinner:**

Everybody had gone now. Emily was putting Jack to sleep now. The boy was really tired. He was on bed and Emily was sitting on the edge of the bed, fixing the blanket on him. He said to her:

"Emily… since you will marry my Daddy… will you be my Mommy?"

She knew that Jack was a very special kid, but she was not expecting that at all. She was thrilled. She said:

"…You want me to be your Mom?"

"Mhm…" Jack nodded.

Emily opened a beautiful smile to the boy and said:

"…Then I'll be the happiest mother in the world to have you as a son ..."

She finished covering him with the blanket and kissed him on the forehead and said:

"I love you ..."

The boy only smiled.

In the babies' bedroom, the twins were in their own cribs. It was the first time ever that they were going to sleep there. Emily said to them:

"Mommy will be here in the next door, okay… but I'll come to check on you okay… my two treasures… Mommy loves you both very much…"

She kissed each one of the babies and left the bedroom with the Baby Monitor in hands. She went to her bedroom for a shower.

Hotch was still downstairs as he was still talking to Rossi about something related to the BAU. After Rossi left, he was locking the gates, the doors, turning on the alarms, etc. And he spent a long time only searching for the cat. He knew that Emily would make a scandal if the cat was not there inside the house and he knew that she was going to ask about him.

Sergio had found a place for him to stay hidden, since Jack and Henry were chasing him all the time during the dinner. Finally, Hotch found him in the tree house. 'What I wouldn't do for you, Emily…' He thought.

Finally, he went to his bedroom door, and the first thing that he noticed was that the strollers were not there. He looked at her and she smiled at him. It would be their first night together alone after so much time, after since she had found out that she was pregnant.

On the other side of the town, Derek was sitting at the counter of a bar. He was taking his tenth drink. He was drinking his pain out while his boss was fucking the woman he was in love with.

**Thanks for reading and please leave a message… thank you…**


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